Bi-Sexuals, Do you have a preference ?

[MissAnne]

While coming to terms with my bisexuality, I am starting to notice that I do have a preference. While I admire women that are feminine, pretty and soft.....I also admire men that are masculine, handsome and strong. I feel an urge to be with men more often than I do with women. It does confuse me at times. My preference for men, makes me feel more straight than anything else. Do any other bi people here feel that confusion (that is if you have a preference ?)

 

[joshbloggs]

I found it confusing to start off with too, and have only recently come to terms with it. There is some reading out there if you get your google machine on. For me, I have always been sexually attracted to men, not so much about the sex with woman, but about love.
I lust after a hot guy, but I long for my soul mate (a woman)

Its hard to explain, and someone might think that I'm full of sh*t but it is truly how I feel.
I have never been in love with a guy, I'm not sure that I can or want to.

It was difficult for a long time, I wished I was gay or straight not somewhere in between, because I could just do the whole "coming out" thing and get on with my life.

Sexuality is a complex thing, but I have come to believe it is more like a continuum, with homo at one end and hetero at the other - and a whole lot of grey in between. It is certainly not one or the other, black and white.

 

[Str8Top14701]

I LOVE women! With guys it's just sex with zero romantic or relationship interest. In total agreement with what you seek in woman vs men. I like a feminine women and a guy that's a guy, and preferably in shape. I'm way more flexible in what kind of body a woman has, not minding a few curves on her. But when it comes to men, they have to be in decent shape.

 

[Telstra]

I LOVE women! With guys it's just sex with zero romantic or relationship interest. In total agreement with what you seek in woman vs men. I like a feminine women and a guy that's a guy, and preferably in shape. I'm way more flexible in what kind of body a woman has, not minding a few curves on her. But when it comes to men, they have to be in decent shape.

so men have to be fit but woman don't need to be fit ?

 

[MissAnne]

Thanks for the feedback. Yeah, I suppose that I have always thought that being bi-sexual meant that you equally liked both. Im realizing that I dont have to be that way.

 

[curtsil]

Amen to that I know exactly how you feel Joshbloggs its always been the same for me. I wanted kids and a wife you know the American dream. I got it but I've ways been attracted to guys more.. you just have to find a middle ground that you can be comfortable with and live your life.

 

[MissAnne]

Amen to that I know exactly how you feel Joshbloggs its always been the same for me. I wanted kids and a wife you know the American dream. I got it but I've ways been attracted to guys more.. you just have to find a middle ground that you can be comfortable with and live your life.

Do you think that you could be comfortable married to a man and have children that way ?

 

[Benvolio]

Thanks for the feedback. Yeah, I suppose that I have always thought that being bi-sexual meant that you equally liked both. Im realizing that I dont have to be that way.

When young, many can perform with either sex and find them attractive. But as they grow older they find that they are more attracted to one sex. Many men find them selves married and with children but wishing the were free. A person should find his or her orientation before marrying. It is unfair to the spouse and children to marry when are not sure.

 

[jjonn3]

Thanks for the feedback. Yeah, I suppose that I have always thought that being bi-sexual meant that you equally liked both. Im realizing that I dont have to be that way.

I think of it as a sliding scale from 1 to 100 where 1 is TOTALLY gay and 100 is TOTALLY straight.

And all of us are somewhere in the scale but which end we are closer to varies. I doubt too many are at 50, exactly in the middle preferring both equally.

 

[aberro21]

Lately I've been much more attracted to men then women.

 

[sumyungguy]

Amen to that I know exactly how you feel Joshbloggs its always been the same for me. I wanted kids and a wife you know the American dream. I got it but I've ways been attracted to guys more.. you just have to find a middle ground that you can be comfortable with and live your life.

Do you think that you could be comfortable married to a man and have children that way ?

I guess it's comfortable for some, but marriage isn't something to take lightly, which is where I think alot of people make the mistake. They think that it's just something you HAVE to do in your lifetime and you haven't lived if you haven't. That's BULL. You really have to be serious about your relationship if you want to be married and you want it to last for the long haul. If you can't be completely honest about your feelings, despite what society dictates, then maybe you should strongly reconsider who you want to be with for the rest of your life. If someone can't understand how you feel then tell them to f*(k off and move on to someone who cares about what you feel.

 

[TXSunsetEagle]

I can definitely relate. While I'm still in the "curious" stage I constantly think of the future and see myself married with kids while in the current moment I'll be crushing after some hot guy. Not to sound like a broken record but you just gotta find whats comfortable for YOU and live comfortably in that zone. As time continues who knows what lies ahead...

 

[Str8Top14701]

So much of it depends on what you find attractive. Some cultures promote the idea thick women, or bushy eyebrows, or whatever. And one is attracted to what one is attracted to, for whatever reason.

Personally, I find women of various body types attractive, not minding a few curves, but not into obese, either. That's just me.

A lot depends on their attitude, regardless of their sex, as most of us probably know someone "hot" that's unattractive because they have bad attitude. A lot of us probably know a "butterface" where "their body is good, but their face..." Just as we all know a few solid "5"s that might be Plain Janes on the surface, but they such a great person we see beyond it.

There's a girl I knew that was bi but drove me nuts with "I'm XX% gay" and then 2 days later it was "I'm XX straight". I got sick of it and told her to quite trying to define her sexual identity with a number and just go with the flow, she'll be a much happier person and I won't want to cuff her up side the head.

 

[Inverted]

So essentially most of you are actually much more attracted to men, but only want to have romantic relationships with women (probably because they're easier and more acceptable by society)? Is that really being bi? With that criteria, I can call myself "bi" too lol.

 

[Str8Top14701]

I am soooo not much more attracted to men. I don't check them out, whereas I've walked into things checking out a hot woman. But, like I said, that's me. What it is for you or anyone else is an individual thing. That's where people get into so much trouble, they start thinking that what they think/feel/do us how it must be, or should be, for everyone. It's like gays that think we bi people are just lying to ourselves, that a person is either straight or gay, and there's nothing in between.

 

[MissAnne]

When young, many can perform with either sex and find them attractive. But as they grow older they find that they are more attracted to one sex. Many men find them selves married and with children but wishing the were free. A person should find his or her orientation before marrying. It is unfair to the spouse and children to marry when are not sure.

True, but I think that goes more for people who claim to be bi, but are actually gay.

 

[Collegedude69]

If I had to choose, probably a woman... I really do enjoy when guys suck my cock or rim my ass, though.. And I have liked getting anal from a guy... But I also love giving anal to a woman or a guy... I guess I am bi...two women eating each others pussy or licking each others butt holes is fucking hot...that gives me a very hard cock! Being with a guy is like fulfilling a fantasy...Sorry, probably didn't answer your question!

 

[cyberdolphnow]

When young, many can perform with either sex and find them attractive. But as they grow older they find that they are more attracted to one sex. Many men find them selves married and with children but wishing the were free. A person should find his or her orientation before marrying. It is unfair to the spouse and children to marry when are not sure.

"Many men find them selves married and with children but wishing the were free."

That goes for heterosexuals and committed gay/lesbians also!

The issue you identify is not bi or straight but closed or open marriage and then add the sexual preference.

Best to be honest up front with your partner- bi preference first (usually bigger issue than open marriage) and then open relationship second.

Figure it this way- some people are great amateur singers- so should that person have to marry a great singer also? No- but the other partner usually encourages the singer to be happy in a choir, small band, etc.

Other people are honest and truthful and can commit emotionally to one person but are not single person sexual relationship able- it just won't happen. So should that person have to marry another of similar constitution? Unfortunately yes because of what society ingrains (marriage is a sexual relationship only between two people) and when "jealousy" raises its head.

People do have differences in sex drives and gender preference ranges just as they have differences in singing abilities. That should be recognized and appreciated but is not in 99.5% of relationships.

And I am in one of the 0.5% of those relationships. And I am probably in 0.5% of that 0.5% as my wife and I are both bi and allow each other the freedom to be ourselves sexually with others.

 

[snakeeater1]

I’m a married bi guy and I’m much more attracted to men! Women are great, BUT they don’t have a nice big cock! And I’m a dedicated cock sucker!….

 

[cumlover91]

This is something that I thought a lot about when I was younger. Where i am at today in my life, I have realized that i like dick a lot more than pussy and I enjoy sex with men more than woman but I do enjoy looking at a woman's ass more than a mans ass. Thats not to say that i don't love men's butts because i do but i do find a woman's ass to be sexier than a man's ass. If i ever got in to a relationship with a woman again, her ass would probably be the initial attraction.