Big Question For Gay Men??????????

[twardmo]

I chose other because i dont know

 

[TopThruster]

I was born gay but just didn't know until I grew up.
Always looked at men and wanted them, just didn't understand what that feeling was.

 

[dynk]

I was also born gay, and was caught by mom at age 5 playing with my little brother's cock. I told her I just wanted him to see how nice it felt also. I still remember 50 years later, cause I got a beating for it. I kept going back though.

 

[januaryguy]

Born gay and enjoyed looking at cocks in the swimming club locker room when dad took us swimming..

 

[tx_doc]

born gay. my first "gay" memory was telling my mother that I wanted to marry Harrison Ford when I saw him in Star Wars. I was always playing with the other boys in the neighborhood. They would want to play with my toys and I would allow them only if they would kiss me or let me play doctor with them.

 

[versa39]

i got sucked into it

 

[jamie_01930]

born gay, just didn't accept it until later in life

always thought I had done something wrong b/c I loved looking at guys

 

[metta]

When religion loses its credibility By Oliver "Buzz" Thomas
Mon Nov 20, 6:40 AM ET



What if Christian leaders are wrong about homosexuality? I suppose, much as a newspaper maintains its credibility by setting the record straight, church leaders would need to do the same:


Correction: Despite what you might have read, heard or been taught throughout your churchgoing life, homosexuality is, in fact, determined at birth and is not to be condemned by God's followers.


Based on a few recent headlines, we won't be seeing that admission anytime soon. Last week, U.S. Roman Catholic bishops took the position that homosexual attractions are "disordered" and that gays should live closeted lives of chastity. At the same time, North Carolina's Baptist State Convention was preparing to investigate churches that are too gay-friendly. Even the more liberal Presbyterian Church (USA) had been planning to put a minister on trial for conducting a marriage ceremony for two women before the charges were dismissed on a technicality. All this brings me back to the question: What if we're wrong?


Religion's only real commodity, after all, is its moral authority. Lose that, and we lose our credibility. Lose credibility, and we might as well close up shop.


It's happened to Christianity before, most famously when we dug in our heels over Galileo's challenge to the biblical view that the Earth, rather than the sun, was at the center of our solar system. You know the story. Galileo was persecuted for what turned out to be incontrovertibly true. For many, especially in the scientific community, Christianity never recovered.


This time, Christianity is in danger of squandering its moral authority by continuing its pattern of discrimination against gays and lesbians in the face of mounting scientific evidence that sexual orientation has little or nothing to do with choice. To the contrary, whether sexual orientation arises as a result of the mother's hormones or the child's brain structure or DNA, it is almost certainly an accident of birth. The point is this: Without choice, there can be no moral culpability.


Answer in Scriptures


So, why are so many church leaders (not to mention Orthodox Jewish and Muslim leaders) persisting in their view that homosexuality is wrong despite a growing stream of scientific evidence that is likely to become a torrent in the coming years? The answer is found in Leviticus 18. "You shall not lie with a man as with a woman; it is an abomination."


As a former "the Bible says it, I believe it, that settles it" kind of guy, I am sympathetic with any Christian who accepts the Bible at face value. But here's the catch. Leviticus is filled with laws imposing the death penalty for everything from eating catfish to sassing your parents. If you accept one as the absolute, unequivocal word of God, you must accept them all.


For many of gay America's loudest critics, the results are unthinkable. First, no more football. At least not without gloves. Handling a pig skin is an abomination. Second, no more Saturday games even if you can get a new ball. Violating the Sabbath is a capital offense according to Leviticus. For the over-40 crowd, approaching the altar of God with a defect in your sight is taboo, but you'll have plenty of company because those menstruating or with disabilities are also barred.


The truth is that mainstream religion has moved beyond animal sacrifice, slavery and the host of primitive rituals described in Leviticus centuries ago. Selectively hanging onto these ancient proscriptions for gays and lesbians exclusively is unfair according to anybody's standard of ethics. We lawyers call it "selective enforcement," and in civil affairs it's illegal.


A better reading of Scripture starts with the book of Genesis and the grand pronouncement about the world God created and all those who dwelled in it. "And, the Lord saw that it was good." If God created us and if everything he created is good, how can a gay person be guilty of being anything more than what God created him or her to be?


Turning to the New Testament, the writings of the Apostle Paul at first lend credence to the notion that homosexuality is a sin, until you consider that Paul most likely is referring to the Roman practice of pederasty, a form of pedophilia common in the ancient world. Successful older men often took boys into their homes as concubines, lovers or sexual slaves. Today, such sexual exploitation of minors is no longer tolerated. The point is that the sort of long-term, committed, same-sex relationships that are being debated today are not addressed in the New Testament. It distorts the biblical witness to apply verses written in one historical context (i.e. sexual exploitation of children) to contemporary situations between two monogamous partners of the same sex. Sexual promiscuity is condemned by the Bible whether it's between gays or straights. Sexual fidelity is not.


What would Jesus do?


For those who have lingering doubts, dust off your Bibles and take a few hours to reacquaint yourself with the teachings of Jesus. You won't find a single reference to homosexuality. There are teachings on money, lust, revenge, divorce, fasting and a thousand other subjects, but there is nothing on homosexuality. Strange, don't you think, if being gay were such a moral threat?


On the other hand, Jesus spent a lot of time talking about how we should treat others. First, he made clear it is not our role to judge. It is God's. ("Judge not lest you be judged." Matthew 7:1) And, second, he commanded us to love other people as we love ourselves.


So, I ask you. Would you want to be discriminated against? Would you want to lose your job, housing or benefits because of something over which you had no control? Better yet, would you like it if society told you that you couldn't visit your lifelong partner in the hospital or file a claim on his behalf if he were murdered?


The suffering that gay and lesbian people have endured at the hands of religion is incalculable, but they can look expectantly to the future for vindication. Scientific facts, after all, are a stubborn thing. Even our religious beliefs must finally yield to them as the church in its battle with Galileo ultimately realized. But for religion, the future might be ominous. Watching the growing conflict between medical science and religion over homosexuality is like watching a train wreck from a distance. You can see it coming for miles and sense the inevitable conclusion, but you're powerless to stop it. The more church leaders dig in their heels, the worse it's likely to be.

Oliver "Buzz" Thomas is a Baptist minister and author of an upcoming book, 10 Things Your Minister Wants to Tell You (But Can't Because He Needs the Job).

http://news.yahoo.com/s/usatoday/20061120/cm_usatoday/whenreligionlosesitscredibility

 

[1st love ron]

Born gay, I am 100% sure. I knew since the 8th grade. Learing at my male classmates felt like the most natural and normal thing to do.

 

[dunno260]

Whether I was born gay or became gay, I knew it an early age. I would lean towards being born, but who knows. I felt something was a little different by 6th grade and knew by 8th grade.

 

[smile86]

I was born gay but just didn't know until I grew up.
Always looked at men and wanted them, just didn't understand what that feeling was.

i would say exactly the same. i feel it's something that was always there but when i hit puberty i started to discover it.

 

[3nipples]

I remember having sexual fantasies involving some of my classmates when I was in fourth grade. Of course I didn't know about gay or straight in those days.

 

[Theyoungman]

I was born this way and knew it since I was a kid.

 

[RenaissanceMan]

If you accept one as the absolute, unequivocal word of God, you must accept them all.

This is probably the best thing to say to Christian people who think homosexual acts are immoral...especially Catholics. This is quite central to what they preach (you hear it all the time, or at least I do) though they put more of an emphasis on following their teachings on things like abortion, contraception and premarital sex (most of which aren't mentionned or even thought of in the Bible). There are still things in there that ARE true. I don't think anyone will decide the Bible is wrong about "do not kill", but it's definitely time to let go of treating it as "God's (ever-correct) word."

Anyway, I voted "born gay and knew it". There was a whole lot of confusion since I was 6 years old, but I always knew I liked guys, and still remember my first (non-sexual) crush. I think I went through the usual phases of a) not noticing I'm different b) noticing I'm different c) realizing HOW I'm different d) trying to label myself e) switching labels f) switching labels again...but I always knew there was no giving up the guys.

And being born gay doesn't necessarily mean having something in your genes...(unless of course we're talking about my pants...)

The only thing we actually choose is deciding to try to be happy with being gay and/or acting on our urges/desires.

 

[eddielee]

I was born gay and new that I liked men from a very early age. The poll results are very interesting.

 

[seven_sins]

I had no control over it whatsoever. I remember looking at other boys in early grade school. I was fascinated looking at them but was not sexually attracted to them until puberty. I don't think I even knew what gay meant until I heard someone refer to an older guy being "queer." I had a sinking feeling in my stomach when I heard it, because I knew that I was one. I didn't really accept it until college.

 

[Leidian]

I was born gay, just didn't know until I was a teenager, and didn't accept it until I grew up. Looking back I can certainly put a gay spin on TONS of experiences and choices, but I didn't think I was gay at the time. I chose #2 - it seemed to fit better.

 

[The_Reaper]

Does realizing at 13 still count as being a kid?


Although there were general hints from before then...

Friends with more girls then boys, liked playing with their Barbie dolls..And a rather someone amusing thought back in gr. 4 that made no sense to young little ole me...

Oh well, I'm counting it.

 

[elmatador_adrian]

I really didn't know I was gay or was attracted to guys until maybe 15, told my self that I was admiring guys because I was attracted to them but because I wanted to copy them or be like them. I didn't really accept the whole thing until I was 19 and didn't come out until 21. I eventually figured it all out, but not as a little kid.

 

[NedNickerson]

I don't like the term "born gay" since that implies there was no choice in the matter...

I think I am a product of conditioning - bad experiences, positive experiences, behavioral modification, etc... I often think that if I had been born in a different family, a different neighborhood, or a different era, I wouldn't have been gay...