Bottom Guides

[soulseeker]

Hi,

Although I don't feel like like I am an exclusively bottom, I do feel like I am on the receiving end. Hence, the dilemma. I don't like much work but don't like penetration either. It hurts like hell. Too tight. Any advice. As I feel the torpedo coming in, the pain is excruciating.

Any advice would help,

Thanks

P.S.: Can intimacy include no ?

 

[BINOWGAYLATER]

i'm hardly qualified to give adivce on this topic - but i do think No means no - and yes - in 'intimate' situations certainly - I think there are lots of guys who draw a line in the sand there - and their partners just have to work with that.. or take a hike.

Others will tell you there are progressive "tools" for improving function - so that's certainly a choice/option.

Just wear the keys around your neck and if anybody asks for them - just say - no- the back door is closed and LOCKED - and you ain't getting the keys. so there......

 

[fetaby]

Hmmm. there is a catch all anal sex thread over in Health and Wellbeing that can probably answer your questions, but you'll have to read it... as for intimacy with no sex? It is possible, you just have to define what you think is intimate... good luck.

 

[Seasoned]

Contray to how some seem to think sex includes all acts that involve arousal. It's up to you and your partner(s) to define it and to be happy and satisfied with it.

 

[Lpool101]

Have a few drinks beforehand, have some poppers as this relaxes the anal muscles. Try your partner fingering you beforehand up to 5 fingers (if possible) then when he uses his cock it won't hurt at all.

If it is STILL sore, then buy some lube with lidocaine in it, that will numb your arse a bit so you won't feel the pain

 

[braex27]

Intimacy can exist without penetration though, in a great deal many relationships, it is considered vital. Perhaps, take it slower and try other things leading up to it to relax yourself, and ease yourself into it?

How about dildos of varying sizes?! Just a suggestion.

 

[soulseeker]

Thanks everyone for suggestion. Very helpful. Really appreciate it. I am not a big fan of penetration. It hurts me really bad. Feel like taking a big dump. Don't know why so many like it. Dildo is a beginning. I am not sure about 5 fingers Can we just kiss or cuddle and then cum?

 

[G-Lexington]

If you don't like penetration - and assuming you've tried loosening up, taking your time, different positions - then let's face it, you're NOT a bottom.

Lex

 

[jamie_01930]

What I have learned is. RELAX, RELAX,and RELAX.
Use lots of lube. It gets a tad messy but the enjoyment is worth it.
There is nothing like a cock rubbing your prostate
It wouldn't hurt to play a little bit with your hole. Have your partner take it slow and easy and before long it will be all that you will want to do

good luck

 

[mbamike]

As the old cliche' states, "Practice makes perfect."

Buy yourself a butt plug, small to medium size, and wear it around the house until you are comfortable having it in your ass. This will take several weeks to accomplish.

Then use lots of lube the next time you bottom and relax. Push your ass out, as if you are taking a shit, as your top penetrates you. This will allow the cock to go in much easier.

Remember to relax. Good luck!

 

[Beanstalk]

I have never liked anal sex either. I have tried it both ways. I can top, but it isn't what I enjoy (I would much rather suck), and I have tried as bottom, but I don't enjoy that at all! Only one time did I ever really come close to enjoying the bottom experience, and that was when I really love the young man who was my top. All I could think about was the chance to give him pleasure, and, much to my astonishment, it actually began to feel good! But that only happened once. I finally just gave up anal sex: I am totally content with oral sex, and I don't want to receive it; I only want to suck. I guess that is what they call an oral bottom.

So, what do you think? Do you enjoy being sucked? If you do, the problem is over -- just find a man like me who only wants to suck all the time.

By the way -- a clever fellow like you must have figured it out long ago -- the pleasure from sex comes from love. When you love someone, any contact at all will be pleasurable.