Boyfriend advice needed

[BenF]

I never ask for advice on this site, but this time I really need some help from you guys about a problem that I am experiencing with my boyfriend.

I have been with him for over five years, and there have been the ups and downs that go with any long term relationship. We have always enjoyed an active sex life, and I really believe that we make each other happy.

However, in the bedroom, over the last few months, when he brings me a cup of tea or coffee, he puts the mug down on the bedside table with the handle facing away from me. I then have to move and turn the mug myself.

What should I do? Should I tell him how I am feeling? Is it too late for him to change his ways?





If a mod feels that this should be in the relationships forum, please feel free to move it

 

[sb]

You deserve better than that. He is taking you for granted. Its time to find yourself a new man who is a little more considerate to your needs.

we are all here for you

 

[GL]

Oh Ben. I'm so sorry. If your boyfriend is placing your mug as such? It's over. Worse yet, he may have a women on the side. You poor thing.

 

[D-Base]

I'd throw all his clothes outta door and never let him back!

 

[sunshinesteve]

Get rid of him, longterm boyfriends are a dime a dozen.

 

[Fastdavy]

Do you think you could be partially at fault?I mean have you ever served him tea with the same problem?
I hate to say it but I think the relationship is over.It sounds like you are totally blame free to me, even if you did ever serve with the handle pointing away from him.
I feel your pain my friend.

 

[pausanias_usa]

I bet he leaves the cap off the tube of toothpaste, too.

Horrid.

 

[operative_seven]

He is so cheating on you.

Kick his ass to the curb before it's too late.

 

[otto1958]

I think you are looking at this from entirely the wrong angle and you should consider it from the mug's (or cup) point of view.

I would say rather don't rush into something you will regret later- you must consider how your mug is going to cope.

Good luck though to ALL of you.

 

[dte]

I'd just get a set of mugs without handles. Problem solved. Relationship hassles overcome.

 

[Ramindra]

Before I can offer my considered advice, I would need to know what side of the bed you sleep on and if it is on this side that your tea is served. Over.

 

[ronboy]

I wouldn't read anything into it.... I'd just turn the cup around before drinking, and be thankful that he brought it to me.....

 

[sunshinesteve]

I wouldn't read anything into it.... I'd just turn the cup around before drinking, and be thankful that he brought it to me.....

You my dear friend have obviously never had a relationship

 

[ronboy]

You my dear friend have obviously never had a relationship

Sorry, 10 years with the same wonderful guy....maybe I'm not reading into the symbolism of a mug handle turned the other way, (because, frankly, I don't understand it), but I do know that the little things that he does that sometimes piss me off aren't as important to me as the wonderful things that he does. I pick and choose my battles...

If I am missing something here, kindly explain it to me...thanks
(it's the way that I will learn...)

 

[jetsonboy]

The new position of the cup means he'd like you to bottom if you're the top, or top if you're the bottom. If you are so bothered by this, why don't you ask him? Communication is the key to success in every relationship. I really hope this thread is a joke....

 

[Inwood]

Ben,

I think its awful that your boyfriend would treat you with such disdain. An abusive relationship is never worth sticking around for, no matter how strong your feelings are for him. Best thing to do is to stay with a close friend until you can go back while he's not home and get your belongings. As little contact as possible is always best in these instances, and if you feel safer with someone else there with you, bring a friend.

We're all here for you, and I'm sorry you have to go through such a difficult situation.

 

[BenF]

I must tell you that there was one, rather unfortunate, incident when I actually knocked the mug over accidentally while turning it. I hoped that this would send a powerful message to him about how I was feeling, but the message fell on stony ground.

It is far too late to ask him about this now.

I suppose that I should have broached the subject with him earlier, when I noticed that things were starting to go amiss. I should have put my foot down and laid down the law to him when I had the chance - it's too late now, I have made a rod for my own back and now have this albatross to bear around my neck.

I don't know how long I can go on like this.

 

[Horschallen]

Leave it that way... because every time you need to turn the cup handle in your direction, you can always smile at how it reminds you how sweet and thoughtful your boyfriend is, in spite of how rough he may be around the edge. Men are hard to get, so love your man and his imperfect ways. Now that is a blessing we should count every time it happens. What do you think, Ben?

 

[BenF]

Leave it that way... because every time you need to turn the cup handle in your direction, you can always smile at how it reminds you how sweet and thoughtful your boyfriend is, in spite of how rough he may be around the edge. Men are hard to get, so love your man and his imperfect ways. Now that is a blessing we should count every time it happens. What do you think, Ben?

Thanks Horschallen

As nice as those sentiments are, it still does not take away the hurt, the pain and the inconvieninece of having to accomodate to his shortfalls.

Perhaps I should be a bit more proactive and take the bull by the horns and confront him about his selfishness.

 

[looseliam]

If only all problems in life were this serious.

I can't stop giggling. Too funny.