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boyfriend advice

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1091MAC

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The continuous sms and his behavior certainly sound suspicous to me.

Not even considering his possible infidelity, the fact that you feel neglected, unloved, and rarely see him suggests to me that it is time you find a new boyfriend.
 
He says he works to earn money to look after you? Well, if you don't mind me asking ,what is it YOU do?

Lex
 
Hi,

This is a very difficult situation esp. for you. You've already confronted him so I assumed that you two had a serious discussion about this but still he continues whatever it is that is bothering you. So its really up to you if you want to continue this & sacrifice everything. Good luck.
 
Wake up boy, people who act like they are hiding something usually are, do what you will but something is up and is not with you.
 
Might be time to reevaluate your relationship and decide what you are both looking for.. Seems like you two are going in different directions.

One sided love never works and thats not what life is about.. You guys have trust, insecurity issues and you need to talk it out. If at end you decide to split it may be for the best, but you may stay together but with new ground rules..
 
maybe its a stage ... maybe its not... but there is something he aint telling you...
 
the fact that you are out and he isn't can be what is causing some of the friction.... after all those years being secretive about your relationship, it could be taking its toll ...... you need to talk to him, find out where his head it at...he could be up to something and looking for a way out of your relationship or he could simply be struggling with finally coming out of the closet and acknowledging the relationship that exists between you... in either case the first step is communication .... even if it is simply letting him read your post here and some of the comments for starters
 
noelie said:
Speaking as someone who went through a hetero marriage breakdown it sounds exactly like that - the relationship is over and you need to break it off before you get damaged beyond belief. It can take two years to get over a bad relationship - it can take many more to get over a really bad relationship especially if you stay in it hoping that it can be worked out while the other person isn't reciprocating.

It doesn't sound like your boyfriend cares about you and the fact that you have already spent several years compromising on his behalf, while admirable to some extent, is a bad thing overall in my opinion - that's what I did - my wife wanted her own space/time/life and held back intimacy from me and I shrivelled up and died inside in the meantime.

You feel neglected because you are neglected. Get out now!

(*8*)
Click to expand...


Wow--that is exactly how I felt the last few years I my marriage, unwanted and unloved.

I was the only one keeping us together and a one-sided relationship can never work out. I am just starting to get some self esteem back.
 
sounds like he gets around alot and hot many guys are after him? Maybe thye are just his friends and you cant accept that they are only friends
 
^^^All very true and I probably could have written that about my own relationship---a simple touch or caress can mean so much.

Finding the strength to get out was the hardest part, once that decision was made I found it easier to move on.
 
Donovan, your relationship is ending and it's time to consider your options in what to do afterwards. Your boyfriend no longer feels intimate with you. He works long hours away from you. You've caught him once messaging other men and now you are seeing the same pattern. If he's hiding his phone from you, obviously he doesn't want you to see.

He may be faithful to you now, but what happens in the next few years? Do you want to feel "neglected" for years longer? If you're not happy now, what makes you think the future will be any different? It won't be different because he's saying nothing is wrong. He wants to keep the status quo. You recognize faults in the relationship (neglect, intimacy, infidelity) and he doesn't see that. If he doesn't see it then he won't change. And if he won't change, neither will your relationship.

Again, consider your options to moving on. Your relationship is ending. It is better to get your affairs in order before he surprises you with cheating.
 
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