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Boyfriend tested positive

MMMonsterBoy

MMMonsterBoy

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I'm so afraid. I'm afraid for him and for me. His ex had HIV, but he was getting tested monthly (rapid test) and came up negative. He's been sick as long as I've known him (a year) and got blood work and tested positive today. We dont have sex as much as we used to, but when we did it wasn't protected. I was tested last fall and came up negative and am getting tested soon.

I keep hoping it's an April Fools prank, but it's real. I feel so stupid and really hurt. I feel like my life just changed in the blink of an eye. I just would feel better after posting this.
 
I don't know what to say, but yes, wait until you get your results.
 
Testing is the correct thing now, but also be supportive of your b/f. He will need it and he can give you support as well. Keep a positive attitude and wait for the result. My best to both you and your b/f.

Craiger
 
Stay strong and do what you can to reduce anxiety. After your testing is complete stay connected with health professionals regardless of the outcome. Seek individual and couple's therapy if needed. Best wishes.
 
Shouldn't it only take 3 to 6 months to show up positive? Could he have gotten a false positive? I've heard those happen. I understand that on the rare occasion that a false negative at three months is usually due to other immune disorders and you said he's been sick but it just seems weird that he was tested every month for the year you were together and just NOW got his positive result. A year gap is almost unheard of. Does he have another illness?

Yeah..I think he should definitely get another test, maybe the non-rapid kind?

Best of luck to the both of you.
 
To be clear, rapid tests are not intended to be diagnostic for HIV. They are screening tests that are intended to screen for people who are likely to have been exposed to HIV. There are other, more accurate, tests that are the basis for an HIV diagnosis. The protocol is that if you have a positive rapid test, EIA or ELISA, you should have the more expensive (and more accurate) confirmation tests to eliminate the possibility of a false positive from the screening test.

Before you do anything else, both of you should see you physician and let him know that you had a positive rapid test so that the proper tests can be ordered.
 
Thank you all for the support and information, I appreciate it.

I spent the weekend with him and it was interesting. I tried my hardest to be supportive, despite being obviously very down. He should start his medication by the end of the month.

As for me I am awaiting for my results. I've accepted the possibility and have began reading up on what it means to be newly HIV positive. I am scared, but I know it'll be okay down the road. I am not going to tell my mom, if I really do have it. I am insured, but I am not sure how much my insurance will cover - but I'll cross that bridge when j get there. Hopefully I am able to cover any expenses without my mother's help.

I'm not sure what this means for our relationship, but I told him I want to be with him every step of the way. However I believe it would be best if we were no longer an item. I don't mind being his friend, but I do want to be in a relationship now and probably not for a while.
 
KaraBulut said:
Before you do anything else, both of you should see you physician and let him know that you had a positive rapid test so that the proper tests can be ordered.
Click to expand...

I hope you both do what KaraBulut suggests. Particularly before he starts any medications. The second opinion option is always the best. In the mean time, perhaps it would be best not to make any concrete decisions. Supporting each other is, in my opinion, the path to follow. Please keep us up to date on both of your conditions.

Craiger
 
Try to not make any hasty decisions right now. Keep in close contact with your medics and find a LGBT peer support group for poz people. The group can be such a great resource for information and support. Best wishes to both.
 
you can make it through this! im sure it is rough but you will figure it out!
 
Thanks again everyone, really appreciate it!

He's doing really well. Things were really rough because it finally hit him and he was terrified, but he's on medication now and is doing much better. We both decided to end our relationship (and not just because he has HIV) but we remain good friends. I tested negative last month, but I am getting tested next week as it will have been a little more than 3 months since my last possible exposure. Seeing him go throughly is experience has made hiv less of a monster for me, but I of course hope that my status remains negative.
 
Good to hear your results were negative. I hope your friend will take well to the meds and I hope you will remain close and supportive. Now is the time when he needs that strength. Keep us updated on your's and his conditions. The best to you both.

Craiger
 
Did you take his word for the supposedly negative tests he recieved while he was sick for that year?
 
I am glad you tested negative and are getting re-tested. You should also check with your insurance company to learn if Truvada is covered as a prEP.
 
Ok, you have to get yur hands on every CURRENT book and medical information his is not optional. The more you know about it the more in control you will be, NOW GET TO WORK
 
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