Breaking up over the phone

[Saybrooke]

I think my boyfriend and I are ready to call it quits. We went on a two week break and it wasn't helping, so I told him I want to see him again and he agreed. That was monday.

Tuesday, we made plans to get together. He started his new job the same day, and I asked if he'd be too tired to hang out. he said he'd be fine. But the evening came around, and I was right. He was too tired from work. it kinda bugged me but I wasn't all that mad. He asked if we could post-pone until thursday (he'd be in the area) and I said yes.

Thursday (or today rather) rolls around. I don't hear from him all day, and I think "He must be really busy at work." Understandable. It then rolls around nine o'clock and I still don't hear from him. So I text him asking if he was still in the area. He had gone home because he was too tired and depressed from work.....

I was thinking it was over when we started the break. Now that I've tried reaching out, he's not putting any effort in. So I'm almost certain I'm going to ask to be just friends. The only problem is, I'm not sure when I'll see him again and I really want this done.

How bad is it to breakup over the phone?

 

[MoufOfKhaos]

Do not text message break up. It's tacky as hell and they wrote a song about it.

I don't see why talking it out over the phone, however, would be taboo.

 

[Appleman34]

Well if he won't come see you, then there really no other way to break up.

 

[Beachguyj]

I was thinking it was over when we started the break. Now that I've tried reaching out, he's not putting any effort in. So I'm almost certain I'm going to ask to be just friends. The only problem is, I'm not sure when I'll see him again and I really want this done.

How bad is it to breakup over the phone?

He is busy with his new job, but if he doesn't want to hang out, tell him on the phone that you get the vibe that he doesn't want to be with you and you still like him as a person and you want to be friends.

 

[Mr-Brooding]

I'm sorry it's unfolding this way, buddy . I broke up with someone through email (Don't judge me, it was 6th grade!), so I'm sure over the phone is just fine. It seems personal enough.

 

[kevbo]

I broke up with my last boyfriend over the phone. He lived in the burbs and it took him 45 min to an hour to come visit, so I decided to save him a trip just to get dumped.

 

[honooryuu]

i personally hate any method that isn't face to face, but over the phone is a lesser evil. with your situation, i don't think it would be a bad thing since it doesn't seem like he wants to make the time for you.

I'm sorry that your situation turned out this way though...

 

[voyager1994]

If you can't talk in person, what else is your alternative but the use of technology? All the best.

 

[genthree]

face to face, then you don't lose face !

 

[palbert]

Sounds to me like all you gotta do is say and listen to a few words. Telephone is fine; text is tacky. I think a nice brief note on parchment paper would be classy.

(Once got a break-up by ******** - now that was cool.)

 

[HunterM]

I think a nice brief note on parchment paper would be classy.

Totally agreed! If it's not in a written form, then it is non-binding in a court of law. Then deliver your message to him via a pigeon.

 

[Beachguyj]

I stopped being friends with someone via PM, but only because they posted something online that excluded me, and it turns out the person wasn't really my friend anyway. He wanted me to be his friend, but he didn't make an effort to be mine. I told the person I didn't dislike them and that he disappointed me and I hope we can be cordial if we ever meet, and he agreed.

 

[Saybrooke]

Thanks you guys, I really appreciate the advise

 

[pat grimshaw]

Don't assume too much.

Starting up in a new job can be physically and emotionally exhausting. He has to put his employmenr on top priority.