Clueless straight guys

[none_2362]

Haha, do you guys know any straight guys who seem to remain blissfully unaware of any homosexual undertones in their life unless it jumps right up in their faces wearing drag and waving a rainbow flag?

I have a funny and slightly fustrating story:
I am mostly still closeted and I have a good buddy who's straight. He knows that I'm a total party boy who would fool around with anyone but he's really laid back so he doesn't mind that about me even though he's a total homophobe. I do find him slightly attractive and there are moments where I catch him in sexy situations and get turned on; but ultimately I know that I'll respect his orientation and not piss it all away cuz we aren't compatible on any levels above friendship anyway.

Well, some time back, my bud introduced me to his friend, this guy he just met. This guy totally set off my gaydar! However, unlike most other guys whom I can tell are obviously gay, I was moderately attracted to him. After talking to him a bit and getting to know him more, I have no doubt that he plays for our team! Problem is, he seems to be infatuated with my straight bud. He keeps tagging along on outings whenever my bud asks him to and speaks rather fondly of him (he does it in a casual straight-acting way, but taking one to know one, I can see through it). The dude has indicated that he finds me attractive too, he's closeted and I'm closeted, but I think we can sort of see through one other without having to say anything, flirted around a bit too. I know I ain't nothing special to him though; he has his eye set on my friend. What the fuck?!? I'm dying of confusion here! Everytime I talk to him him, which is quite often, I can't help feeling conflicted.

On the one hand, I'm jealous of his feelings for my friend, I want him to give me a chance instead; yet again I want to tell him to piss off, cuz I feel the need to protect my clueless bud from this guy whom he has no idea has it in for him; and, to make matters worse, the little part of me that's hot for my straight buddy as well sometimes put me in a competitive mood with him to show that "hey, if this guy ever decides to try cock, it'll be with me!"

Haha, and all the while, my stupid meathead friend keeps complaining about girls he can't have and not getting any. I can't count the number of times the three of us have been hanging together and he has sat there in his own straight world, completely ignorant of the dense subtext in motion whenever the two guys he's with speak to each other. Cuz he thinks I'm with this girl (whom I kinda was for a while), and I have no idea how he can't notice his other friend constantly coming on to him.

Do any of the straight men you guys know act like this as well? I find it extremely funny that all the hints I drop trying to inform my straight bud of the situation have zoomed right over his head.

 

[gotdimples77]

yeah that sounds like a drunken threesome waiting to happen to me

 

[Kyanimal]

Quite a few years ago, I was in New Orleans with a co-worker. "Mikey" had just turned 21, a few months before, our weird schedule had a week off, (mid-week to mid-week), neither of us had ever been to New Orleans, "Mikey" had never even flown before, in fact, he'd never been very far over the borders of Wisconsin! So ... this was kind of a "Vacation Birthday Present" for him. He was also 5'7", black hair, green eyes, "swimmers" build, and CUTE as HELL!! Also ... very straight! (And, YEAH!, I did have ulterior motives! But ... never acted on them, out of respect, and the likelyhood I would probably scare him to death!)

Anyway ... we had "adopted" a bar/restaurant as our center of operations, and on the weekend one of the waitresses invited us to a "party". We found our way to a "local/non-tourist" bar, east of Bourbon Street, later that night. (She, and her friends, never did manage to show up. They got "stuck" at a different place. But, that was the night we discovered "Turbo Dog"!! )

Staggering back toward our hotel, we passed through the "Gay End" of Bourbon St. At 2am, the bars, and sidewalks, were packed! Guys, and mainly JUST Guys, hand in hand, arm in arm, were all over the place! And there was a gold Firebird, with three guys in it, slowly moving through the throngs on the street. I saw them check out "Mikey", practically drooling out their open windows!

We had managed to stumble about a block when the Firebird slowly crawled by again. This time I could almost see saliva running down the doors! "Mikey" nearly walked into me as he turned, and said, "Do those guys really think they're going to find a parking space?"

He had NO CLUE!! He hadn't even noticed it was ALL Guys we were weaving through!! I'm sure part of it was the "Turbo Dog"! But most of it was His complete "Innocense"!!

Lots of Str8's walk around in total oblivion to the "Gay Side" of life! It never crosses their minds. Or, if they do notice, they just shrug it off as, "Nah! Can't be! I must be imagining things!"

So ... with your Buddy! But, if I were you, I'd keep things simply Friendly with him, and hook up with this new pal!

You can commisserate with each other, over your unfulfilled lust for Str8 Dudes, and even cry each other to sleep, while snuggling together under the sheets!!

Keep smilin'!!
Chaz

 

[none_2362]

So ... with your Buddy! But, if I were you, I'd keep things simply Friendly with him, and hook up with this new pal!

You can commisserate with each other, over your unfulfilled lust for Str8 Dudes, and even cry each other to sleep, while snuggling together under the sheets!!

Keep smilin'!!
Chaz

I want to keep things strictly friendly with him, I love him as a friend and nothing more; the attraction I feel for him is purely lust, I don't have any romantic feelings for him.

Aww... Kyanimal, thats a sweet scenerio, thanks for your advice! I wish that could happen!

Haha, its the most screwed up love triangle ever right now:
- I'm slightly attracted to my straight bud but I have feelings for the gay dude.
- The gay dude is attracted to me but he has stronger feelings for my straight bud.
- Haha, and the straight guy likes us both as friends, but he definitely likes me more than the gay dude cuz we've been buddies forever..

 

[Alberto_15]

Haha, and all the while, my stupid meathead friend keeps complaining about girls he can't have and not getting any. I can't count the number of times the three of us have been hanging together and he has sat there in his own straight world, completely ignorant of the dense subtext in motion whenever the two guys he's with speak to each other. Cuz he thinks I'm with this girl (whom I kinda was for a while), and I have no idea how he can't notice his other friend constantly coming on to him.

This is funny, lol.

 

[none_2362]

Heh, I'm gonna meet them again tomorow, let's see what happens. =P

 

[none_2362]

Haha, I always thought it meant "Fuck off! I'm with her!" everytime a guy with a chick stares at me too!

 

[Kyanimal]

I've got to get myself back to Belgium!!

O.K. Another "Clueless Straight Guy" story ... (hopefully short!) ...

Family Reunion, in Indiana, for Kev's "Clan". A bunch of us decide to check out the lifeguards at the park lake. 4 Gay Guys, and three Straight nephews, travelling in a Pack. Yeah ... there were female lifeguards, too! We're all pointing out "prospects" for the others ... Gay Guys pointing out females, Str8 Guys pointing out males! The Nephews are all very "Kewl"!!

On the way back to the picnic site, we're walking fairly high up on a hillside. On the path below is a guy, with three girls, headed for the lake. The dude was a picture perfect, blond, blue-eyed, muscled, Indiana "Farm Boy"! Of course, the 4 Gay Guys start leading the Pack down the hillside, toward the path, to check out the awesome "Beef on the Hoof"!

"Blondie" saw a bunch of guys drifting toward His group. He immediately moved to position himself, defensively, between us and his "Women Folk"! He had No CLUE that HE was the object of our interest!! And a FINE "Object" he was, too!! I wonder what he would have done if only he had "Known" ...

Keep smilin'!!
Chaz

 

[Oral Fixation]

First talk dirty about things that you know turns him on. Then wait until his dick is hard, then take your cock out and start stroking. Probably at that point he will not be able to hold back, and will take his own cock out. Be bold and talk nasty things about girls and about cocks. Sex is 99% in the mind. Create a nasty, explicit and permissive atmosphere with words, and watch the dicks get hard at the ideas. Then when he's fully into it, try to see if you can jack him off. Don't try to touch him until he's in that "full motion state" where he's only aware of getting off and isn't thinking of anything else. Wait until he's in that "sex machine" mode, and isn't really thinking about homophobia and all that stuff. When he's in that state, with the rigid look in his eyes, breathing heavily and stroking heavily, it will be much safer to touch him, play with his balls or something, then offer to take over the jacking duty. If he is agreeable to that, you can even try to progress to sucking him, but be aware of his responses before continuing to move forward. A hard dick has no conscience.

WOW, thanks for that detailed 'lesson' - I will definitely keep it in mind (like, all the time, but anyway). I always wondered how some guys end up jacking off or even sucking off a straight guy. I know it happens, but could just never imagine how it could happen (mainly due to my vast lack of experience). But this definitely sheds some light.

 

[Oral Fixation]

Really!!! I thought that most straight guys (and I'm talking about the severely straight ones) would abhor even the thought of watching gay porn, let alone want to watch. You know, sometimes some people think that by even uttering the word gay, they will 'catch it'!!!!

 

[none_2362]

First talk dirty about things that you know turns him on. Then wait until his dick is hard, then take your cock out and start stroking. Probably at that point he will not be able to hold back, and will take his own cock out. Be bold and talk nasty things about girls and about cocks. Sex is 99% in the mind. Create a nasty, explicit and permissive atmosphere with words, and watch the dicks get hard at the ideas. Then when he's fully into it, try to see if you can jack him off. Don't try to touch him until he's in that "full motion state" where he's only aware of getting off and isn't thinking of anything else. Wait until he's in that "sex machine" mode, and isn't really thinking about homophobia and all that stuff. When he's in that state, with the rigid look in his eyes, breathing heavily and stroking heavily, it will be much safer to touch him, play with his balls or something, then offer to take over the jacking duty. If he is agreeable to that, you can even try to progress to sucking him, but be aware of his responses before continuing to move forward. A hard dick has no conscience.

Thanks for your advice, it sounds like a very hot outcome. Unfortunately, I think you guys mis-interpreted what I said. I don't want to have a sexual experience with my buddy, I love him as a friend and nothing else.

Its just like when a str8 guy has a hot female best friend, not interested in her romantically at all. But if he sees her naked, he'll still get turned on because she's an attractive woman. Yea, so I can't help but get turned on by him at times, but other than that, i'm not into him romatically at all.

You know what, I'll continue hanging with both my straight friend and his gay friend for a while and get to know the gay guy a bit better. If he's worth it, I'll persue him. And hopefully, he'll say yes and we could go out, with him losing complete interest in my straight bud. And without the gay guy around constantly remind me how hawt my straight friend is by being infauated with him, I think my unwanted attractions for my str8 bud will fade and we could become even closer friends without me having to worry about falling for him.

 

[none_2362]

So any advice for me abt how to deal with this?