Coming Ourt

[johnscott]

How did you come out to your family and friends?

 

[SilverRRCloud]

I did not.

I live my life as I find fit. When I decided to take a friend of mine back home, he was introduced as my best friend at the moment and everyone was free to draw their own conclusions. Both my friends and my family were smart enough to take that step on their own.

Admittedly, I grew up in a very liberal environment and all the players went to the extreme in respecting each other private lives.

You'll have to decide for yourself, what makes most sense and do the right thing at the right time.

SC

 

[JOHN B]

I went to college in another state (here in Ohio actually) so that I could "be gay" without my family knowing. College, as it turned out though was just a bunch of imature grown up high school kids. My first year I did not associate with many people, so no one really "knew". About this time I wondered how I could tell my family. I then realized that the easiest way to get up the nerve to tell my family was----to tell everyone else first! Then I would have no choice. Eventually I would HAVE to tell them. From then on I mingled with other students and made some minor friendships, and people eventually began to "figure it out". Amazingly only two other guys on campus ever came out to me! I found out about the others after I graduated (too late then!) So, from then on I was out in my personal life, and years later when I was with a partner, I "had the talk" with my family.

 

[gazza18]

i always laugh wen i think about wen i came out and how stupid i was. for 3/4 years i stayed in the closet, worst period of my life, all sorts of crazy things floating thru my mind, most im not proud of (i leave that to ur own imagination) but it reli was hell. last year i decided enough was enough, why sit and be unhappy any longer, i braced myself for rejection and just went for it. i told my first friend over msn, her initial reaction was shock, but acceptance, not total as she sorta religious, we had the whole god debate, but she is a wonderful friend n il always remember her. i slowly told each friend individually as time went on. most of the time it seemed to be on a night out that i wud tell them, if u plan on doing it this way, stay sober enough so that you don't make a fool of yourself. my two best friends initially accepted it, both hugging me, one saying he was starting to suspect, i had begun dropping hints to make it easier. so one of my friends was a complete legend, the other not so, infact now i dont consider him a friend. we became distant and recently i found out he denies im gay, despite meeting bfs etc. complete wanker so ive moved on in my life and he isnt part of it any longer. after that i eventually told everyone and all my other friends have been accepting. now for my parents, this was sort of an accident, more a serious of differnet events lead to me telling them. i stayed out reli reli late on a school nite, was at my bfs house, they were extremly worried, crying wen i came home at 4 in the morning, thought i had crashed or something. they asked were i had been and so i told them and they were so relieved it wasnt something like drugs etc that was causing my unsual behaviour, all the secrecy etc, n both hugged me and said they love me and after an initial months awkwardness and silence everything has been amazing and im evn closer to my parents and able to be more honest and myself. everyon has commented on how happier ive been since coming out last year, it was the best decision ever. my only advic is to prepare yourself for any potential rejection and have a place to go if your parents arent accepting, best of luck xx

 

[MusikBoi]

Honestly,

I came out to my best friend this past Sunday night.
I was chatting with him on AIM and told him then.
Telling him was probably one of the hardest experiences I've been through.
I also came out to another friend Monday night. It seems to be easier to tell more people now, and I'm glad I did.
They were both accepting and nice about it.
I feel closer to them and now I am able to express my true feelings in their presence.

It's amazing.

Best of luck to you.
Hug

 

[isuckmen]

Well, over the couse of a month and a half ( but mainly today...) I came out to my moms entire side of the family...

See this thread
http://www.justusboys.com/forum/showthread.php?t=191925

And I am waiting to tell dad... That is going to be later this month.

But when you do come out,

1) Be prepared for less than stellar responses and Hope for the best...
And remember that things are never nearly as bad as we expect them to be.

2) Have at least one person to fall back on, a person who you can rely on and expect to be there for you if it all goes to hell...

Best of Wishes to ya, So far I am extremely happy I told the rest of my moms fam and the rest of my friends. But I told everybody ( minus mom and 'lil sis) today between 12 o'clock and 7...

We are always here for you!!! Remeber that!!!

 

[johnscott]

I was just curious. I don't actually know whether I am bi or gay. I suspect bi, but I can't see myself doing anytime soon. I do have one friend who I am 95% sure is bi (certainly not gay) and he's my best friend (weird, huh?) however he has gone off to do a ski season in Verbier and I won't see him until Juneish time, because I am off to Africa for five months in Febraury so we overlap and I won't see him for about six months now. I am going to come out to him first, because I know he will be understanding. Though I can't see any of my other friends being as accepting (I may just be very paranoid). My mum I think may suspect, but not know. Will certainly tell her before dad, but it's just so nerve-racking. I can't see my dad rejecting me. We are a very close family. I will probably tell my uncle (a hilarious priest) before I tell mum or dad aswell - his brother is gay. But not for at least six months. To be honest I can't see myself doing it at all... I will just eat myself up inside! Haha. This is why I hate being bi; social fucking pressures. That's why when people talk in generalised terms about bi and gay people and say their rough and they've chosen to be it, I get quite defensive - I, personally, have not deicded to be this; I just am.

Wow, that was embarrasing - my sister just walked in on me typing this! I don't think she saw the site or suspects. I think she does suspect that I might be bi or gay though...

Ah, it is annoying though.

 

[johnscott]

I'm just interested as to what some of you actually said: what and how did you tell them?

But I think I want to have sex with women before I decide.