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Coming Out 2 friend soon

T

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Stop already! Just tell her - and him! Sounds like they already know! Nothing bad is going to happen to you!! Best of luck!!
 
I'd tell her, it's awesome to have a close friend you can talk to about everything you want. She even asked you before about it, so she probably already expects it and won't have a problem accepting it - so if you trust her, just go ahead. :)

Then you two can decide about telling the guy or not; as you said yourself you think he's not gay so it miiiiiiight not be worth saying.
 
sydabristow said:
Ok... Iam gay and no one knows. I am only a senior in high school. Me and my best frined always joke around with the gay subject. She has asked me a couple of times if I was gay but I always say no and turn it around on her, cuz she mad out out with a chick when she was drunk. shes not gay though. We always jump around the subject and one day this boy name Jake, im pretty good friends with him, he acts like hes gay, cuz he likes to tocuh me and blow me kisses and grab my upper chest (nipples) and says I love you and shit like that. I dont like him or anything but i wud tap that.. lol I don''t think he is gay but she always ask me why I let him do that an when he does that I laugh she always says where is ur boyfriend jake, and i say a dirty gay remark cuz we are close and shes knows im playin and if i tell her im not gay she bleives him I was hoping to tell her but dont know how. I know she wont care becuase she told me of i was ever gay we could go to the mall and oogle hot guys. (which soundz like fun.. if i might add).. just plz give me some advice. thx yall
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DO IT! I have a best friend that is a girl too and I told her when I was a Freshmen in highschool! You need to tell her ASAP! It made everything much more open and fun between us. Like if we see a hott guy we can point him out to eachother unlike before when I hadn't told her yet.she was actually REALLY happy that I was gay! Like you said, if she won't care then you got nothing to lose! DO IT!

and I also know a Jake that kidds around, and I'd bang him ANYTIME!*|*
 
It great that you have close friends who really care about you. I agree with previous posts that they already know you are gay. Confide in them. I am sure they will support you in any way you need. Good luck.
 
When I was going through a major depression several years ago, I thought about putting on a brave face for everybody. Going it alone. But I decided my friends deserved to know, and I might need their support. So I told them. "I'm going through a major depression right now. I may not be too much fun to be around for awhile, but I could certainly use some support."

One friend said he found that depressing, and he walked away.
All the others stuck by me. And they've been great friends ever since. And, with a few, I've been able to return the favor.

Sometimes, something happens that separates the men from the boys. When you, as they say, find out who your real friends are. You can either shy away from that, or you can buck up and do it. Friends aren't supposed to be a group of people you hang out with that you have to work to impress. They're people who accept you, warts and all. If they can't handle something like homosexuality, then they're not friends - end of story.

Lex
 
marleyisalegend said:
god, seriously people don't push this kid out the closet ASAP. maybe i'm driving my point into the ground but i think this situation certainly merits a lot more thought and soul-searching than DO IT ASAP. i can't count how many people who came out regret it, even leading some to commit suicide. let's not act like its party hats and mojitos when you come out to someone
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Sounds like you have issues and tissues. Suicide? Good grief, get a grip.

Now to the O.P., come out and tell her. The sooner you are out of the closet the better. Love yourself, and everything will be alright.
 
I say just tell them. They already know anyway. So just do it.
 
The short answer is that no-one knows if you're ready to come out except you. She seems more or less okay with the idea, but ultimately it's your decision. How will she ever get the chance to accept it if you never tell her?

But something that isn't covered here is that her acceptance of the issue is not the only consideration - who will she tell? How will it change your relationship with her boyfriend? Things of that nature. These things shouldn't control your decision, but they are certainly factors.
 
Hey sydabristow,

This maybe a little late, but Welcome to JUB mate... and thanks for your post.

Mate, as you can see there can be a number of opinions as to whether or not coming out to people is a good idea or not... and it should always be something thats personal and done on your own terms and your own time. It can have ramifications for sure... but done in a well thought out and considered way its the start of you living your life with a freedom that you dont yet comprehend.

Your friend has given you a green light here by the sounds of it. She almost certainly suspects at a minimum and by the sounds of it shes simply respecting you by waiting for you to confirm it rather than accusing you of it.

So... if you feel safe and trust here which it seems you do... and your post shows a pretty intelligent and sensible guy... tell her. Shes obviously drawn to who you are not what you are and that says a lot about both of you.

There a huge benefit in having a friend that you not only love but trust so well. Her comments show that she feels the same about you and her jokes are aimed at making your decision easier. She respects you and you her. It sounds like the foundation for a great freindship sydabristow.

Good luck mate... and when you are ready... have fun at the mall!
 
Tallguy (and the post before that) said it all. ..| Read and re-read their advice.

marleyisalegend said:
in my humble opinion, saying "coming out to friends is as easy as pie" is like saying "college is going to be a breeze and you won't have to work hard"
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Coming out should be done with careful consideration if financial or safety issues might ensue (your parents might throw you out of the house; the local KKK might lynch you; etc.).

But in many areas, coming out will produce nothing more than lost "friends" (as others have so eloquently put it, like Lex and Puff), a bruised ego, and some nasty homophobia. They are not life-threatening.

I'm gay, an atheist, and a tree-hugger. Should I hide this from all my friends, family, coworkers, and acquaintances because they might ridicule me? I don't shove it in their faces, but I don't let their views go unchallenged if these topics come up, either.

The sooner you stand up for what you are, the sooner you'll find like-minded friends who accept you for who you are. And the sooner you'll be happy.

Hanging around or dwelling on "friends" who reject you is counter-productive.
 
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