Coming out has soured me and my brothers relationship

[123kid]

Well at this point you really need to confront the situation. If I were you I would ask him what his biggest issue is. It could honestly be something other than you being gay. Maybe he feels mislead, feels you are a completely different person then who he thought you were. The best point to start is to find out where the issue beings.

 

[backpacker]

On labor day, I was over at my folks’ w/my BF and his pregnant fiancée

Your bf has a pregnant fiancee? Just kidding, I know what you meant, but I couldn't resist.

Since it's been a year, it doesn't seem like the relationship will get any better unless the two of you sit down and talk. Did you actually come out to him or did he find out through your parents? If it's the latter, maybe he's still waiting for you to come out to him (i.e. talk to him about it). At this point, one of you has to be the bigger man and make the first move. Remember, you'll soon be an uncle and hopefully have a relationship with your niece/nephew. I would try to catch him at home some time when your parents are out. Don't think of it as "confronting" him, as that implies that you are right and he is wrong. It's not about right and wrong, it's about your relationship with your brother. Good luck!

 

[JackFTwist]

What should I do about this? Should I bother to confront him, or just let it go?

let it go

what the hell good will confrontation do - make him see the light?

some people need time. Maybe he'll always be an asshole and let it be on him, don't add "confrontation" to it all.

Maybe he will be like Mary's little lost sheep and come home wagging his tail behind him.

His fiance is on your side.

Your boyfriend observes sagely.

Give it time.

Life is long.

Let it go.

Confrontation is a lose/lose proposition.

Life is long.

Give it time.

 

[xterranx]

The "w/my BF and pregnant fiancée" really threw me off.

CHANGE IT PLEASE. It bothers me. =(

 

[Love_chair]

I no how you feel with your brother I came out to everyone 3 years ago and everyone in my family still loved me except my older brother he had a problem with it for about 6 or 7 months and then he started to come around and now he does not care he still loves me but you said it's been a year since you came out and your brother still has a problem and so I think you 2 should call up a meeting just you and him no one else and have a heart to heart about it and afterwards see if he starts to change but if things continue to go bad then I guess theres nothing else you can do but leave him be and let this run it's course

 

[provenlogic]

Confront him. Ask him WTF his problem is.

 

[rareboy]

He sounds like an immature dick.

I agree; have it out with him. Ask him why it bothers him so. Tell him that you still love him as your bro and hope he can understand and accept you. Make sure he clearly understands that you will never abide any rudeness or ill treatment by him.

....and make sure you treat your parents better than he does. That way, at the end of the day, he'll be the one isolated from family, not you.

 

[Spiff]

I don't like the confrontation idea, it's just likely to make things worse and irreparable. Instead treat the whole situation like it's his problem and not yours. Continue going to your family events with your bf. Just be yourself and be happy and let him be the one to deal with his own problem. This approach can't make it any worse than it already is. Hopefully though after some time, your brother will realize he has outcast himself and gradually drop the chip on his shoulder.

 

[fjancsi80]

Instead of confronting him speak with his fiance. According to your description she is a nice girl who will probably help you. Tell her that your brother's hostility really bothers you but you two are not able to speak about the issue without arguing. I think some female diplomacy is what you need with this very hetero dick