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Coming out to my teenage brother

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I need some advice, guys...

While I am already out to most of my family on my mom's side (since high school) none of my family on my dad's side is aware that I'm gay. Including my half brother and stepmom, whom I'm super-close with (i call her "other mom", "my brother calls my mom "other mom.")

My brother is turning 18 tomorrow and I really feel like he should know me and know who i've dated and everything, but I haven't been able to think of a way to come out to him. It really is about time. We haven't lived together since he was a toddler, so it's not like he knows who i've dated and lived with and everything that's gone on in my life.

I'm sure it's not going to be any big deal or anything, but I don't know how to go about bringing it up, and explaining things and all that. Also, i'm not sure I'm ready to deal with my step-mom and all the "you're not getting married and having kids?!" drama.

anyone have any pointers on coming out to a teenage brother? similar experiences? words of encouragement?:confused:
 
I thinkit is cool you want to talk to your brother - I'll be sending good wishes your way!
 
In my case, I will offer you words of enouragement -- be proud of who you are and do it when you feel the most comfortable ... I mean, you will always be scared but there will be that one moment when you will decide that enough is enough and you just have to let it out.

And DO NOT come out on your brother's 18th birthday ... it's his day, and you don't want him remembering this milestone with your coming out and you stealing his show. Wait another month or two when the novelty of adulthood wears off.

Like I said before - you will know when the right time will be.
 
I'm with Rican on this one, let your brother have his day. Besides that I think it's great that you want to let your brother know. Best of luck to you! :)
 
It's neat that you want your brother to know. When the time is right, you can say begin by telling him how much you respect him and appreciate his friendship/brotherly love (or whatever phrase works for you). And, because of that, you want him to know something about you, because if you don't, he really won't know you and that could prevent a closeness that would be a shame. Then, tell him.

Don't be apologetic or embarrassed. Just matter of fact and/or happy about it. Chances are, he'll follow your mood-cues about it and be happy for you.

Good luck--and let us know what happens!
 
i don't understand why "u want to tell him". do yall actually go and, on some date u set in your day planner, and go tell someone you're gay? i don't understand why u just don't let the topic come up. do you have a girlfriend? ... no, but i have a boyfriend. what's wrong with that?
 
Just tell him, he's an adult. I don't see why you need ot tell him who you've dated, unless they're all people he knows or are important to him. If that's the case, you don't have the right to out them if they're still in the closet.

But as for just telling him that you're gay, I'd say you should just let him know by telling him directly. Let him know that you wanted to tell him because he's an adult, he's your brother, and he deserves to know all about who you are so your relationship can be stronger.
 
You are probably stressing about nothing. If so many people in your family know I'm pretty sure the information has trickled down to your brother.
 
My bf told my younger brother - but then, he was my brother's best friend. I had always planned to tell him, but it was always one of those 'finding the right time' dilemas because I knew he idolised me and I wanted to get it right. The first I knew was when Dan rang me one evening (I worked away during the week) and said 'By the way, I told **** about us today!'

During the subsequent conversation I discovered that my brother had shed a few tears, but they were of relief and happiness. He was pleased for me and Dan, and relieved that he now knew. It turned out that he'd always suspected, but was waiting for me to tell him. He didn't want to ask me for fear of upsetting me and prying into my private life!

Me and my brother are closer now than we've ever been, and I hope that the same thing happens for you.

Good luck for the future, and please let us know how it goes - when it happens.
 
I agree with the others too.
Tell him sometime after his birthday.
You might approach it by saying how much you love and admire him and how pleased you are with him and the traits and character he's displaying as a young adult.
Let him know you have deliberately waited to share something important with him until he was adult enough to understand and then tell him the truth.
I don't think he needs to know who you dated or any intimate details, let him digest the concept first. Later on, when he's comfortable with the reality of the whole thing and you want to share more with him in a brotherly/best friend manner, then do so.
Best wishes either way.
 
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