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Confessions thread

fabulouslyghetto said:
Ok rated R confession: I can count the number of times I've been fucked on one hand.
Click to expand...
You told me that you needed to use a calculator :rolleyes:

I have the overwhelming urge to slash someone’s tires but I’m too nice of a person to do it.
 
Alistair said:
You told me that you needed to use a calculator :rolleyes:

I have the overwhelming urge to slash someone’s tires but I’m too nice of a person to do it.
Click to expand...
Glad you mentioned that. Anal doesn't count. Let my favorite now pop artist Cheyenne Cinnamon break it down for you.

 
:mrgreen:Uh oh, Ali back keepin' you honest, Miss Cinnamon Pop til you Drop.😇:rotflmao:
 
I taste the grapes before I buy them in case they are under or overripe or sour.

30 grapes later and I decide they are OK to buy and realize there are only a few left on the bunch - so I have to rinse and repeat.

I used to pull pranks on this one valley girl waitress - she looked alot like Reese Witherspoon and was kinda like the clueless high school blonde cheerleader (she actually was a cheerleader) - SO - one day when she came in all bubbly and she had the floor for two hours by herself - right before I left I told her that she had a small banquet of 30 coming in (THERE REALLY WAS A BANQUET SET IN THE BANQUET ROOM BUT IT WAS FOR THE FOLLOWING MORNING) - and I told her to go check it out before I left in case she needed something.

WEELLLLL:ROFLMAO:*%%*- on the chalkboard in the banquet room I wrote in huge letters "WELCOME BLACK LESBIAN SOCCER FOUNDATION" and I heard her scream and she came running out in a panic. I asked her in an innocent way if she had a problem with soccer players? - or black lesbians? - and then I left the building.

It took her a month before she burst out laughing - and then I pulled the next prank which turned her entire face bright red - such fun
 
I broke the glass on a new stove when I stubbed my toe extremely hard and shoved a chair across the kitchen in dealing with my pain! Thank god the fucker was still under warranty the store apologized profusely and repaired it for nothing dont buy a stove with floating glass in the front colossal pain in the ass the glass breaks into several trillion pieces!
 
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