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Confused - any ideas?

M

motownguy2011

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So I've been talking with a guy I met on a site for a while - just small talk, until I finally got the balls to kinda sorta ask him out (I asked him if he wanted to get dorm food, haha - and I was afraid to ask him online, so I chickened out and offline messaged him... anyway....). He got back to me and he said he was kinda trying things out with someone but he'd get back to me. No problem.

We kinda just stopped talking, until he randomly IM'd me; we got to talking, and just started talking about random shit again - random happenings on campus and stuff. To me, it seemed like he was hinting he wanted me to go to event things where he would also be there (saying things like "you should go" and stuff). I dunno if I misinterpreted, but that's what I got.

So finally I sent him an e-mail on the site asking him to maybe clarify to see what's up - I understand if he's seeing someone, but I was confused and wanted to clear it up. He kinda read it but never got back to me for a while so I figured I blew it and kinda sent an apology e-mail. My AIM was broken and he was trying to AIM me apparently, but I fixed it and he finally IMed me. So, we started talking as if nothing happened - it was never brought up, and I wouldn't dare bring it up for fear of myself screwing this up...

I'm not really sure how I should interpret this? I'm so confused with how this is going and I don't want to start like, coming off as a creeper to him or something. It just kinda bugs me not knowing what's going on, and I'm just really lost in this situation. Help?! !oops!
 
i would be up front and to the point...thats just me because i don't have patience for stuff like that anymore...tell him how you feel...if he responds with something, great...you guys can move on...if he doesn't respond, find somebody else to talk to...time is too short to be playing games with bullshitters.
 
Yeah I guess so, but I thought I asked him what was up once already, and nothing really came of that at all.

I dunno - I don't want to ask him and ruin at the very least the online friendship we have. However at the same time I hate kinda playing around and seeing where it goes.

Sigh, what a predicament.
 
Why don't you just come clean about it?

"Hey, I like you, and although I do like the relationship we have now, I think I'd like to move it forward if you're willing. If you're not interested in that, that's cool, but I just wanted you to know that I'M interested."

Lex
 
I'm confused, does he still have the boyfriend?
 
TX-Beau said:
I'm confused, does he still have the boyfriend?
Click to expand...

I don't know... I asked him over e-mail on the site, and he never replied back after a few days, which made me send the apology e-mail.

Now we're talking as if it never happened, so I dunno what's going on.
 
yeah, ask him again. If he says know, he's still not available. If he says yes, then you'll know or at least find out when you see him.
 
Any recommendations how I go about this? I already did it once and it kinda fell through so I'm afraid to piss him off or something (I can't stand leaving a bad trail or anything...).

Should I try to catch him next time he's on AIM, or try to send an e-mail to him on the site? I'm afraid I'll word it wrong, but I just want honesty and not awkward silence again... ugh.
 
motownguy2011 said:
Any recommendations how I go about this? I already did it once and it kinda fell through so I'm afraid to piss him off or something (I can't stand leaving a bad trail or anything...).

Should I try to catch him next time he's on AIM, or try to send an e-mail to him on the site? I'm afraid I'll word it wrong, but I just want honesty and not awkward silence again... ugh.
Click to expand...

Considering your current mode of communication, you're liable to get some "awkward silence" anyway.

Just tell him how you feel, without getting all weird about it.

Explain to him that you appreciate the relationship that the two of you have established, but that you're not really comfortable having to fill in the blanks that intermittent Internet communication has to offer, and that you'd really like to get to know him better as a friend.

The next time he gives you one of those "you should really go to, or attend, or whatevers..." tell him that you'll be there, and then ask him where to two of you should meet.

If he agrees, then show up without any preconceived expectations, and take it from there.

The guy might just turn out to be a flake, and honestly who of us needs flakes in our life regardless of how much they make our hearts go pitter patter, or that give us wood thinking about them?

Good Luck! :D
 
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