Curious about sexuality

[mrcate]

Hello guys,
I'm new here and as it is said in the title i'm not very sure about my sexualtity especially for the past few years. I'm 19 at the moment and I was always attracted to girls although I never had a girlfriend. My friends sometimes called me "gay" because I never dated girls but I'm just very shy and insecure around other people and I don't feel attracted to guys.
But sometimes I get thoughts about myself getting dominated by another man and I'm also very into anal play. Does that sound weird? Because I'm very ashamed of my sexual kinks and I don't know if this is normal or not.

It would be great to hear if someone has some similar thoughts.

Thank you in advance!

 

[seven2go]

You sound perfectly OK to me.
Around here, a fairly rural area, LOTS of young men (into their mid 20's +) don't have girlfriends........they're too busy working and playing with their trucks.
You wouldn't be the only one who is interested in guys NOT because they're guys but because they have dicks.

 

[ballcaphair]

mcrate, I'm 10 years ahead of you. Don't feel confused. Curious is my sweet spot. I've worn your shoes since I was 13. I was your age when I realized I was actually fine. You sound perfectly OK to me too. You're standing on the cusp of something wonderful. Just play safely. Enjoy yourself. You've come to the right place.

Friend me.

 

[DantheManFL]

Welcome to JUB. There's nothing wrong with you. I know some totally hetero males who are into ass play. It's part of knowing your body, and what it enjoys. No worries, Mate.

 

[MoaningMike]

You're totally normal, all guys have questions about their sexuality, all guys are insecure about something. Anyone who says they're not or never have been is just putting on a bullshit macho front. It's really too bad society is still hung up on something as natural as sex, nobody should feel ashamed of what they feel (unless it's deeply sick and illegal). You can be sure that some of those guys who have called you gay have sucked a dick or two. Lots of guys mess around with with other guys, even if it's only once, they just don't admit it. If you fanatasize about being dominated just go with it, let your fantasies flow! You can be sure there are guys out there who want to dominate you. You like to play with you ass? That's far more common than you might think. Ass play doesn't mean you're gay, it means you like pleasure. Lots of straight guys have dildos or vibrators, they just aren't interested in men. Lots of women like to play with guys holes. Being gay is more than having sex with guys, it's more about who do you love. Maybe you want a guy to fuck the hell out of you, but you have no desire to kiss or date him? That's fine too, lots of guys just want sex (sometimes just a blow job or a fuck and never see you again) and nothing more. Tons of married guys screw around on their wives: they are either super horny, the wife won't blow them, or they are closet cases. At 19 you should be keeping your options open, go have fun! You might just meet a guy who you unexpectedly find yourself falling for, it can happen. Just see where it leads, you might just find you can't get enough of him. Maybe you're bi and that's okay too. Don't compare yourself to what others do, you'll never be happy be happy. Your sex life is nobody's businesss. You said that into anal play, so I assume you've got dildos and vibrators and butt plugs. That's great because you already have you're hole trained for when you meet a guy you want to dominate you. If you love having something big and thick in your ass, you're going to love getting fucked for real....even if you don't have any romantic interest in the guy plowing you. There really is nothing like getting the cum fucked out of you.

 

[xyxyxy]

Seems normal to me, sexuality isn't always black and white

 

[Keljuki]

My friends sometimes called me "gay" because I never dated girls

They don't sound very nice for people that are supposed to be your firends.

 

[Shelby29]

Hello guys,
I'm new here and as it is said in the title i'm not very sure about my sexualtity especially for the past few years. I'm 19 at the moment and I was always attracted to girls although I never had a girlfriend. My friends sometimes called me "gay" because I never dated girls but I'm just very shy and insecure around other people and I don't feel attracted to guys.
But sometimes I get thoughts about myself getting dominated by another man and I'm also very into anal play. Does that sound weird? Because I'm very ashamed of my sexual kinks and I don't know if this is normal or not.

It would be great to hear if someone has some similar thoughts.

Thank you in advance!

As you can tell by the responses you've gotten so far that you picked the right site to come to and interact with all the fantastic guys on JUB! When I was a teen I was soooooo shy and I didn't date girls but I did have a best friend...he lived next door and we discovered sex together and it was awesome! I was attracted to guys and girls so I knew I was Bi. But admittedly I did have serious doubts about my sexuality mostly because of what society said was "the norm". Well, I feel perfectly normal now nd have for years.
Give yourself some time, keep your options open...and don't listen to what society says you should be. Be YOURSELF. Be happy. I certainly have had some awesome male and female relationships! Keep in touch!

 

[Briacon429]

Mrcate, you’ve already taken the first step: you’ve acknowledged you’re curious, and you’ve asked for tips.

When I was 19, I was too nervous to do any of that. At the time, I was convinced I was straight. I did date girls, although I was awfully picky about them. At one point I dreamt about a male classmate, and I occasionally checked out gay porn online, but I told myself it was just a fluke.

If there’s one thing I wish I could do over, I wish I’d acted on my urges back then. Your late teens and early twenties are a great time to explore, experiment, and sow your wild oats. Unfortunately I wasted those years trying to be someone I wasn’t. (I also wasted other people’s time, most notably the girls I dated.) When I finally did give into my feelings... WOW! It opened up a whole new world for me, and I learned so much about myself that I’d never imagined before.

Anyway, the point is... don’t worry about labels, and don’t worry about what other people think. If you want to try being dominated, or just anal play in general, go for it! If you enjoy it, great, and you can keep doing more of it! And if you find you don’t like it, oh well, you can always try something else.

Just stay safe, and have fun!

 

[willhunt]

^^^^ What Briacon said. On behalf of a straight man who can absolutely relax in here. Welcome. We validate you.

 

[dd788snipe]

mrcate I can point you to another forum that has been of great help to me. Shybi-guys.com. between JUB and this site I've been able to work through a lot of feelings with the help of many individuals. Welcome, as you can see we are here to help.

 

[Shelby29]

mrcate I can point you to another forum that has been of great help to me. Shybi-guys.com. between JUB and this site I've been able to work through a lot of feelings with the help of many individuals. Welcome, as you can see we are here to help.

Double d, I agree. I like shybi-guys.com too!

 

[shyboi03]

Nothing to worry about, I always thought I was straight, then after a friend persuaded me to get a tattoo with him when we were 15 (he knew a guy that would do it) it led to gay experiences and I have enjoyed it. Still a virgin and never been with a girl yet, but hard with a "gay" tattoo.

 

[mrcate]

Thanks to all of you for your replies, it feels great to hear some honest opinions.
It's not easy to talk about this in real-life because it seems like most people I know are quite close-minded when it comes to homosexuality or something that's "different from the norm". Additional to that I'm very anxious around people and have problems in trusting them so it's very hard for me to just go for my sexuality. I wish I could but I am always ashamed when I do something that don't fits the "societiy standarts" and I often feel like I'm weird or gross if I do.
I am just very confused because I often feel annoyed by guys I know and I'm interested in different things as they're so it's hard for me to hold a conversation or make friends. It's a bit easier when I talk to girls but I get completely overwhelmed by the idea of having sex with them. And I don't know if I ever accept my sexuality enough to go for a guy.

Thanks again for the positive replies and suggestions guys!

 

[BiGuyFla65]

Mrcate, I was the same as you in high school. I didn't fit in with most of the popular groups such as the jocks or the real smart guys. I went to an all-guys school so interacting with girls was particularly difficult. I have since married, had 2 kids and am living a straight life. I still jack off to gay porn and have hade a couple of M/M experiences. It's a long strange trip and you never know what life will bring to you. Just try your best to be yourself and enjoy the trip. At least you have places like JUB to express yourself and find like people. The net did not exist in my day.

 

[willhunt]

mrcate, Don't beat yourself up. There is no "norm" any more. Finally! I'm no shrink, but it seems like you're anxious about men and women. Cut your self some slack. You don't need to carry this heavy load. Bring it all in here and we'll help you try to make sense of it. Remember there is no norm, everyone is overwhelmed at times. You are in a community that has your back. If it is all sunshine and roses, or anxiety and shit, we've got you. Now shake it off and go get some on ya. Everyone deserves some.

 

[Kyanimal]

Mrcrate, Welcome to JUB!

I could tell you my story if there was enough space on the servers. I'm a P.K. (Preacher's Kid), who grew up under a small spotlight, with Everyone knowing who I was, without me always knowing who they were. Did I feel like I was always being judged? Um ... Yeah! It's a wonder that I didn't become completely paranoid. There was a part of me that was constantly on guard, and it took me decades to shake off most of that. It still "automatically" kicks in, a little bit, to this day.

My sexual history is Bi. It wasn't until I hit 30 that I "gave in" to my core nature, and went with just guys. Had a Lot of FUN with the chicks, though. It's not that I didn't try. Almost, nearly, married five, or six, of them. Luckily for them, and for me, I always backed off, considering my "little secret" of preferring beef over fish. It was just the way I was wired, and I can only speak for myself. Enough about me.

Here are some things I've learned, some of which took me way too long to realize. It is my hope that you'll find these helpful ...

There has never been, nor will there ever be, another YOU. You are the perfect You. That is not something to be ashamed of, but rather something to Cherish, and Celebrate! Be the best You that you possibly can be.

NO ONE has any more right, nor privilege, nor innate power, to judge, shape, or decide who You are, or will become. YOU are the Only one in charge of You. It's entirely up to You to make your own way. Do what You can, and want to do. Period.

EVERYONE harbors insecurities about aspects of themselves. What you see are merely projections everyone hides behind. They are just as vulnerable as all of the rest of us, and none of us possess any more "magic" than You do.

ALL of us react to what we perceive is being presented to us. Know that in turn, they also react to what they encounter. The most effective social move is Confidence, especially when that is the opposite of what you're feeling.

You do not owe Anyone more than you are willing to give. However, with all things, the more you give the more you'll gain in return. That goes for Confidence, Caring, Friendship, Love, and on, and on, and on. Be careful, though, because that is also true for Hate, Spite, Revenge, etc., etc., etc. LIFE is a series of mirrors. Project what You want to see.

I could keep going, and a lot of that might sound trite. Thing is, there is Truth in Simplicity, but Simple ain't always Easy.

Wishing You the Very Best!

And, yeah ... No Matter What ...

Keep Smilin'!!
Chaz

P.S.
See my sig ...

 

[Pierresro]

Hello guys,
I'm new here and as it is said in the title i'm not very sure about my sexualtity especially for the past few years. I'm 19 at the moment and I was always attracted to girls although I never had a girlfriend. My friends sometimes called me "gay" because I never dated girls but I'm just very shy and insecure around other people and I don't feel attracted to guys.
But sometimes I get thoughts about myself getting dominated by another man and I'm also very into anal play. Does that sound weird? Because I'm very ashamed of my sexual kinks and I don't know if this is normal or not.

It would be great to hear if someone has some similar thoughts.

Thank you in advance!

The straights that called you gay were not nice people, while gay is nothing to be ashamed of they had no right embarraing you. Good Friends are just thatthey were not nice!