Daddies, Boys and Married Men

[redvik1]

I'm in my early 50's, married with 3 grown kids. I'm in what seems to be a somewhat small minority within a minority in that my wife knew my story several years before we got married and had no issues with it as long as I didn't bring anybody home. (We met and fell in love in the days of free love - a time that based on some intolerant comments I've seen in the postings some younger folks don't understand. We've been married over 30 years.) Now that I'm in my Daddy phase of life, I find I'm attracted to younger men (mostly 30-45), and get very turned on when they call me Daddy. I'm apparently still attractive enough to appeal to a fair number of younger men. The problem I run into is that when I tell them I'm married, because I am always up front about this, 9 times out of 10, they"ll say"No thanks, I've done the married man thing and it turned out badly." I can understand if they are looking for a certain kind of relationship. On the other hand, I would think there are younger men out there who want to be with a Daddy, and enjoy all the Daddy Boy relationship can offer, without being in a full time relationship. Am I wrong about this? I'm wondering if the only type of man I should look for is another married man. If that's the case, where do you find them?

 

[snapcat]

Welcome aboard!



I think you can absolutely find that right person that you are looking for, and posting here is a good way to start. The more you talk and interact with other people, the better your odds of finding someone. You won't ever find anyone unless you do talk to people, so this is a step in the right direction.

There will be some people that just aren't going to be looking for that kind of relationship, of course, but on the other hand, there are some people who would welcome it.

Where you live could have a big impact on all of this. In rural, more conservative areas, it's not unusual for someone your age to have married early in life. The fact that your marriage is still thriving is a testament to you both. The odds may have been stacked against you, but you guys made it work.

Above all else, have patience!

We all love Daddies in this forum, so please feel at home here!

 

[wilecoyote]

It's just as difficult for younger guys to find the right 'dad' who wants the hot sexual dad/son relationship, but not the love/ LTR thing. It's great that your wife is understanding and you already have the love relationship. Some boyfriends are not always understanding in the same situation, where the partner wants a "dad" and how it fulfills a different need, which goes beyond sexual. I think a Man (out/not out, unmarried or married, kids know/don't know) who has kids my age and likes for me to call him Dad - especially during sex - is a huge turn on. By the way, so I am not misunderstood and this becomes a "Eww he's gross and wants to have incest" thread, It does not mean I wanna have sex with my own Dad.

 

[ejbonk]

Your not alone in this. At 43,I find young men in their 18 to 29 yrs old to be very sexy and love to have them call me Daddy. Being married has been a draw back. Young men have different ideas and additudes than those of us from a different generation.

 

[bankside]

Well think about it - you say yourself that you're a very very small minority because your wife knows and is okay with it.... when people hear that you're married they probably assume you are cheating, and even though you aren't, the stats mean that people are going to assume it.

As far as the attitudes and ideas of the younger generation, or intolerant comments, I have no problem with free love but i would still say no, because the way I'd see it bluntly is that I'm not going to settle for your wife's leftovers. It is great she lets you play on the side, and I'm sure that is just what some guys would be looking for, but a lot of the men you approach are not. They want to be the main course, not stuck with calling you Daddy when it is convenient for you to slip away from your wife, and always having to entertain you because you aren't allowed to bring the people you sleep with into your own home. So there's another way that the numbers are cut down, because for a lot of people those limits would get pretty boring pretty quickly.

Lastly, I've seen plenty of men older than me who are hot, but I've never ever wanted to call any of them "daddy." Another stats thing - you're looking for a very small minority within a very small minority for a very specific fantasy and that is going to take a while to find.

Here's a suggestion - I'm sure you can find gay or bi guys in "open" relationships...look there first.

 

[ejbonk]

Un-like the poster,I can have a guy over. I chose not to because of the children. 10,7,and4. My guy doesn't get leftovers,he gets all the M2M love I have to give. As a Bi ,I feel and need Both the M2F and the M2M relationships to be a whole person.
We had a MMF arrangement once until his work forced him to relocate overseas.That was before,We had to raise my wife's grandchilren after the death of their mother.

Besides,I thought this was a Drama Free zone and Safe-Haven Post area.

 

[echuck]

Well, I guess I'm in almost the same boat. I too am atracted to youger guys but don't ever get called daddy. I'm looking for a good buddy to be with me. This would also include that I am very much married and in love but want the other side somewhat.

Chuck

 

[Conrad_2]

Well, I guess I'm in almost the same boat. I too am atracted to youger guys but don't ever get called daddy. I'm looking for a good buddy to be with me. This would also include that I am very much married and in love but want the other side somewhat.

Chuck

Me too Me too - 32 yr old married guy looking to satisfy my bi-curious side of life. Wife is well aware of my interests and is ok as long as I'm safe (and I don't share details) - I'm from NY and lookin!

 

[ejbonk]

To be perfectly sexist, it sounds like you are looking for a less-than equal male in the same way so many straight men look for a less than equal woman. I say that because you key in on the psychological dynamics of being called 'Daddy', etc. You don't talk about lusting after younger flesh for its own sake.

But that's giving you the benefit of the doubt. You say "Now that I'm in my Daddy phase of life,..." Does Daddy phase refer to the fact that you are a daddy of grown kids? Taking away the benefit of the doubt raises the question of whether this particular desire of yours is a redirected desire to fuck your own kids.

Or, do you tend to relate to anyone who lets you as the one in charge, the responsible, bring home the bacon one. The one who must be listened to or no allowance.

Maybe it seems safer for your marriage's long-term health. after all, 'kids' grow up and leave. 'Don't worry, honey, soon Bruce will have kids of his own and it will just be the two of us again'.

I can understand wanting to snog young flesh--it tastes and smells and feels so fresh and sex-ready. I can even understand occasional role-playing. But what do you thinks gives rise to your desire? Can you find happiness with an equal?

YOU THINK TO MUCH.
THAT LOT DAMN NEAR GAVE ME A HEADACHE READING IT.
ARE YOU MENTAL,FUCK MY OWN KIDS.
GET REAL THE DADDY THING IS THE SAME FOR BI'S AND GAY'S AS IT IS FOR STR8'S. IT'S ALL TIED INTO THE AGE OLD SEX QUESTION"WHO'S YOU DADDY?" AND THE FAMOUS LINE FROM FARRIS BUELLER'S DAY OFF "DO YOU HAVE A KISS FOR DADDY?"


SOME-BODY HAND THIS GUY HIS PHD,PLEASE! HE'S EARNED IT.

 

[Storybook_Man]

wow, where I live lots of guys like married men, actually very few turn them down..

 

[sentirpromesas]

I have dated a married man. And my main qualm was that in the end, the married man will chose his wife. I was alone on valentine's day because he went to florida with his wife. Every holiday he was gone with his wife.
Many gay boys are attracted to the daddy/boy relationship because of the emotional stability a daddy can give them. Daddy will always be there. But when the daddy is married, "always be there" isn't guaranteed. I think that's why we prefer a single daddy

 

[ejbonk]

wow, where I live lots of guys like married men, actually very few turn them down..

Just where do you live??? I would be very interested in relocation for retirement.

 

[Storybook_Man]

I live around the New Jersey Shore Points... Wildwood, Cape May, Sea Isle, Ocean City, Atlantic City, Egg Harbor to name some.

 

[chooselife]

I have dated a married man. And my main qualm was that in the end, the married man will chose his wife. I was alone on valentine's day because he went to florida with his wife. Every holiday he was gone with his wife.
Many gay boys are attracted to the daddy/boy relationship because of the emotional stability a daddy can give them. Daddy will always be there. But when the daddy is married, "always be there" isn't guaranteed. I think that's why we prefer a single daddy

good post

married guys are a turn on for me but it also means trouble if you start to get attached

 

[ejbonk]

It all depends on the married guy and his wife. Some guys can get attached,but have to accept and remember it,not just you and him. It's you,him and her a 3 way partnership not just 2.

 

[fireside]

good post

married guys are a turn on for me but it also means trouble if you start to get attached

If you know they're married, don't get attached. It's pretty easy.

Nailed a guy recently who's getting married very soon, and coming back to town to do so. Shortly after the event, I sent him a text message saying we wouldn't be having sexual relations ever again. He never asked for clarification, but the sentiment behind that was 'you'll be married, thus any travel that isn't work related will be with your wife, and if I come to where you live it will be with your wife, thus rendering any opportunities to do anything impossible'. Then again, I knew that going in (which penis went where notwithstanding), so no attachment.

Now if I'm wrong, and another opportunity to 'drive the spike' presents itself, then fine. I'm not holding my breath; besides, I have this whole life thing I'm supposed to be living.

 

[Storybook_Man]

Do what I do, really like the married men but dont get attached =).

 

[chooselife]

If you know they're married, don't get attached. It's pretty easy.

for you maybe but we are not all the same, I wasnt speaking from experience it was just a general comment

 

[ejbonk]

There's lots of guys who'd love that situation.

Good sex with a hot older man with no possibility of strings being attached. You're the good guy... your wife is aware of what's going on and everyone's cool with it. I've always said that people should define the parameters of their own relationships and as long as no secrets and lies are in the mix... more power to you.

Sadly, you're the victim of the other gang who sneak around... it always leads to drama.. it's not fair, but that's life.

Just keep being up front about it and the right guys will find you.

The Guys that Sneak Around are just Plain Bad News. Yes,They make it damn near impossible for guys like me to find a guy to spend time with and get close to.