"That is something you will have to know (decide) for yourself." That was often the closing line in any conversation with my parents. They were never eager to micromanage the lives of their children.
I was spared much of the silly crap that my peers got from their parents. My folks were content to lay down very general guidelines: 1)Don't look for trouble, it will find you and your job is to learn to deal with it. 2)Don't hurt others or yourself. 3) Always remember that actions often have consequences which last for a lifetime. (That last one I took as their gentle way of reminding me that in my town if you get a girl pregnant you will marry her....!)
My whole family knew that I was "different" but both mother and dad assured me that being different was alright. They liked my new friend, the new guy in town, who soon became my first male sex partner, a relationship that lasted through high school. Nor were they surprised when I spent a lot of time with the "girl next door" (five years older than I) the next summer when my teen lover was away on his grandparents' ranch in Montana. It was she who gave me a most comprehensive introduction to the female body and to the joys of sexual intimacy on that side of my sexuality. At the end of that summer I was sure where my major sexual interest would eventually be; I had become an enthusiastic and competent lover to a loving lady friend.
On the surface my life was no secret to my family. They met and were very proper in welcoming my "friends" and they did not probe as to the nature of those friendships. Yes, they were all relieved when I introduced them to the young lady who had agreed to bet the rest of her life on life with me.
Bob Dylan's advice to parents was for them to remember that "your sons and your daughters are beyond your command; the times they are a'changing," was something my parents knew already. I have always been grateful to them for the wisdom they demonstrated in all these matters.
I was spared much of the silly crap that my peers got from their parents. My folks were content to lay down very general guidelines: 1)Don't look for trouble, it will find you and your job is to learn to deal with it. 2)Don't hurt others or yourself. 3) Always remember that actions often have consequences which last for a lifetime. (That last one I took as their gentle way of reminding me that in my town if you get a girl pregnant you will marry her....!)
My whole family knew that I was "different" but both mother and dad assured me that being different was alright. They liked my new friend, the new guy in town, who soon became my first male sex partner, a relationship that lasted through high school. Nor were they surprised when I spent a lot of time with the "girl next door" (five years older than I) the next summer when my teen lover was away on his grandparents' ranch in Montana. It was she who gave me a most comprehensive introduction to the female body and to the joys of sexual intimacy on that side of my sexuality. At the end of that summer I was sure where my major sexual interest would eventually be; I had become an enthusiastic and competent lover to a loving lady friend.
On the surface my life was no secret to my family. They met and were very proper in welcoming my "friends" and they did not probe as to the nature of those friendships. Yes, they were all relieved when I introduced them to the young lady who had agreed to bet the rest of her life on life with me.
Bob Dylan's advice to parents was for them to remember that "your sons and your daughters are beyond your command; the times they are a'changing," was something my parents knew already. I have always been grateful to them for the wisdom they demonstrated in all these matters.
