Dirty unwashed ass

[Sniffademskidz]

"What do you mean by pitching up improperly dressed!?

Go back home, rifle through your dirty laundry basket and find the smelliest unwashed black socks that you can!

You ought to know by now that I like to shag my boys on their back with their smelly feet resting on my shoulders!

The smell of dirty black socks always adds an extra inch to my erection!"

 

[Sniffademskidz]

-So glad you decided to take A level art Jason!

-It means that I get to spend time in your studio Sir!

-I just love your colourful underwear and I get to make pretty patterns on the cheeks of your arse with my cane!

-I need to be a bit more creative though Sir because my boyfriend is getting bored sniffing the same three brown stripes on the seat of my underpants every day!

You need to help me spice things up a bit Sir!

-We'll get our heads together Jason or rather I'll get my head up your arse!

Thank you Sir!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

"Go on sniff his feet! I dare you! You're his personal trainer and he likes and respects you!

Why not move things up a notch!?

The worst case scenario is that he will punch you in the face but with any luck he might enjoy the experience and offer you his arse as the main course!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

This fast track route to promotion is certainly one up on doing all those bloody exams!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

-This is the Spiderman chatline!

What would you like to know Sir!?

-Have you got cobwebs across your arsehole or does your boyfriend fuck you on a regular basis!?

 

[Sniffademskidz]

If you're advertising for a European sugar daddy and want him to see your hole it might be an idea to take off your sweatpants before you take the photo!

It's hardly rocket science my friend!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

Look at the arse on that fucking bitch!

That fare is mine and once I get him in the back of the taxi with the child lock on he'll be totally at my mercy!

I won't even bother to take down his sweatpants! I'll just rip the seat out of them and 69 him in a secluded part of the park!!!!!

 

[Jack Offer]

This whore has just enough hair inside his crack and on those two cakes.

 

[Sniffademskidz]

Being that close to a ball sack gives a new more pleasant meaning to the expression:

"To get the sack!"

The wrestler's name is Dave Dawn so that's a double whammy:

"To be up at the crack of Dawn!!!!"

 

[Sniffademskidz]

"It can be quite an advantage to have your own built-in sat nav but this little baby tends to have a mind of its own especially if it homes in on the tight buns of a fit young 18 year old cyclist in black.lycra shorts!!!"

 

[Sniffademskidz]

The English language is wonderful isn't it!

This irate landlord is pursuing his young tenant for RENT ARREARS and the only solution the impecunious young stud can find is to offer his arse for RENT A REAR!!!!!!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

If you're wondering what music is being played in that gym I can tell you that it was Michael Jackson and:

"Can you feel it! Can you feel it! Can you feel it!?"

 

[Sniffademskidz]

"Let's face it lads if this guy broke into.your house the last thing you'd do is cal! the police!

You'd ply him with whisky till he couldn't stand up, shag the shit out of him and invite him back tomorrow evening!"

 

[Sniffademskidz]

I trust that the same warm invitation is extended from the seat of your Calvins!

 

[lckmyass]

CUM make your eyes water guys

 

[Sniffademskidz]

It's Christmas afternoon! The girls have taken the kids out for a walk after lunch and your bother-in-law is out for the count on the sofa totally ratarsed!

You've always fancied him and this is the best chance you'll ever have to shag him!

The question is:

Do you pull his shorts down and 69 him there and then on the couch or do you try and drag him up to the bedroom where you can take your time exploring all his nooks and crannies!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

When we were kids my baby sister used to say to me:

"Darren I love you so much and what's mine is yours!"

Ten years down the line she's got this stonking hot boyfriend and when I've fucked the arse off him after training today I'll remind her of her words!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

-We've run out of condoms Conner!

-I've spent all day doing a job I hate and the only thing that's kept me going is the thought of sending a million or two of my hot little swimmers up your shit chute!

Do you think I give a fiddler's fuck about condoms!?

I'm gonna send my jizz so far up your arse you'll be spitting it out of your mouth for days to come!!!!!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

There's just something about the way those sweatpants cling to his beautiful body!

Just imagine opening your door at 8pm on a Saturday evening and finding that RENTBOYS R US have sent you this little beauty!

I just hope you've got enough cream in your low hanging bollocks to seed this little baby multiple times...............

 

[Sniffademskidz]

"Sorry mate you've got the wrong number!

This is not the Speaking Clock but if it's any help all my instincts tell me it's twenty five past five!"