Dirty unwashed ass

[Sniffademskidz]

-Fuck man! She's stood me up! Half an hour before the wedding ceremony and she's dumped me by text! The bitch!

-Oh dear Josh! Well it would be a pity to waste the ring......and I'm not talking about that little band of gold!

Now drop your knickers bend over the washbasin and I'll give you your wedding night right here and now in the men's restroom!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

Ok boys I'm the CEO of "Shitters r us!" so a warm welcome to you all!

Remember that this is an escort agency with a difference 'cos all our punters have stipulated that their escorts must have shit -stained arses with very respectable brown stripes on their Calvins!

This fetish for skidded undies is fast becoming a growth industry within the escort industry!

Now before I send you out on your first assignment I want you to drop your undies and let me check that you fulfil the punters requirements!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

-Are you sure you wanna sniff my arse mate!? I've just had a six pound dump!

-That's exactly why I want to sniff it!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

-You really make learning fun Sir! Those textbooks are so stuffy and boring but you really make the subject cum alive!

This practical lesson in shapes ,for example, is brilliant! You can see here that I have made a triangle!

-Well done Adam and I have something which is long, rectangular and semi-solid which should fit nicely in your circular hole!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

Are you telling me that I have been assigned to this guy as his personal trainer!?

So there really IS a God!!!!!

I will have to come up with some excuse as to why his sweaty lycra shorts and socks have mysteriously disappeared when he was in the shower!!!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

My Maths teacher told us during the lesson that "you can't fit a square
peg into a round hole...."

......but he wanted me to know that this was NOT valid when it came to a" black peg in a white hole" and he lost no time in proving it to me in the boys' changing room after school!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

Victor's holiday in Manaus in the Amazon had made him think about how deforestation was damaging the environment!

So after a six pound dump he decided to go paperless in every area of his life starting forthwith!

Instead of wiping his own arse with toilet paper he called for room service and a smiling bellboy was more than happy to lick him clean!!!!!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

-Have you finished sniffing my panties yet!? I need to get back to work! I don't want to get sacked my first day at a new job!

-Sorry mate I'm keeping these as a trophy and proof that I fucked the newbie on his first day! You'll have to go commando!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

TEXT MESSAGE:

Looking forward to hooking up with you later but can you go into the bog and take a photo of your pucker hole 'cos I need to know whether I can slice cleanly through a shaven haven or whether I've gotta wade through the Amazon forest!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

28 year old Dominic Calvert-Lewin who plays for Everton is arguably my favourite black footballer!

Five minutes with his skidded skuns draped over my face will be enough to make me cum buckets!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

-Have you done as I said and not changed your underpants for three days!?

-Yes Sir!

-Fuckin 'ell! I can't wait to sniff those babies! Right we've only got half an hour for lunch so let's get behind that bush and I can go to town on your shitter! I love you foreign workers......So fucking obliging!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

This guy may be only AI but he's got to be modelled on the real thing and somewhere out there the real living and breathing version of this guy has got some lucky bugger's nose wedged up his shitter!!!!!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

-Mmmmm! Pink lycra cycling shorts! Very pretty

-Well they're not pink all over mate!

-What do you mean?

-Well I've just done a pretty intensive training workout in the woods after I'd taken a mammoth dump so I'm guessing the seat is a nice shade of brown by now!

-That's funny 'cos brown is my favourite colour! Would you mind if we just went a bit further into the woods and I had a look for myself!

-Go for it mate!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

I'll say one thing for my daughter! She certainly knows how to pick her boyfriends! This one's a real looker and just clock the buns on him!

The only problem I've got is to work out how to get a piece of that action myself!

I suppose I could let him stay over on condition that they sleep in separate rooms, put something in his bedtime cocoa to knock him out and then nip into his room at 3am in the morning and shag the arse off him!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

Being laid off from.one's job was once considered such a sense of shame among some Japanese men that they would pay the ultimate price by taking their own life!

Even now employees will do anything to keep their job and employers will naturally profit from this situation!

This gorgeous young man has decided that he would rather allow his pervy old boss to hsve his wicked way with him than risk.joining the dole queue!

Lucky boss! Just imagine flipping this little baby over, easing down his undies and sniffing your way into his pleasure dome before doing him 69 with those rather natty turquoise socks still on his feet!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

"Kiss your feet? I'll do more than that mate!

If you don't come up with this month's rent I'll be shagging the fucking arse off you as part payment!

Your choice!"

 

[Sniffademskidz]

I wonder if LIDL's "buy one get one free" offer extends to cyclists' buns!?

If you look closely enough this young man is carrying a banana in his back pocket so if none of his teammates will fuck him at the next rest stop at least he'll have something to pleasure himself with!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

I would say that 22 year old Romeo Beckham is arguably the hottest of the three Beckham boys!

If he ever tires of pussy and wants to pass on the fish course and go straight to the meat I'm sure that there will be no shortage of willing volunteers to rearrange his guts!!!!!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

-This guy has just sent in this photo with his application for the job and the CEO has said that he automatically gets the job!

-That's crazy! He could be anybody so he is going to be offered the job without an interview on the strength of this one photo!?

Oh no there'll be an interview all right but just so that the CEO can check that his nose, tongue, finger and cock will be a good.fit for this lad's pucker hole!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

Creeping up on your boyfriend and giving his feet a sniff is one thing but doing it to a complete stranger in a park is quite another and does involve an element of risk especially if you leave that baseball bat where it is!