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Dirty unwashed ass

"Hey dude you've seen my donkey dick and you're saying that you'd still prefer to lick my shitty arse!

Wow man! There's no accounting for taste but as the old saying goes:

"The customer is always right!"

Ok I'll leave the door to my apartment ajar and you can take my skidded underwear away for some "happy sniffing" until you book the next session! "

Jeez this is a weird job but it's one up from street cleaning!
 

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-Can you spare a couple of quid for a coffee mate!?

-I can do better than that! Are you any good at gardening!?

-I have worked as a gardener in the past!

-Well if you come and tidy up my garden you can stay in my spare room free of charge!

Wow! Thanks mate! Have I died and gone to Heaven!?

(I don't know mate but I certainly have!!!!!!!!)
 

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30 year old Spanish motor racing driver Carlos Sainz is demonstrating here how versatile he is as a sportsman whereas the rest of us are more interested in how versatile he is between the sheets!!!!!
 

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I'm sure that none of us would turn up our noses ( no pun intended!) at the chance to have a good sniff of these little babies in the gym locker room but they still can't compare with sniffing a rich brown skidder on the seat of a pair of tighty whitie Calvins!!!!!!
 

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-Whoops sorry Josh I didn't think there was anyone in the house today as your mum and dad are at work and I thought you were at college!

-I'm taking the day off cos it's my birthday!

-Oh yeah I saw all the cards downstairs! 18 today! Congratulations! I'll cum back and clean in here a bit later!

-Well actually now that I'm legal I was hoping that you might give my hole a deep clean!

-Sure will baby boy! How about some of Daddy's special creamy white cleaning fluid to lubricate that sweet smelling shitter!?
 

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Wouldn't mind running my nose up and down the arsecrack of the boy on the left and the boy on the right can be first reserve but not too worried about the one in the middle so he can fuck off whenever he likes!
 

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32 year old Italian footballer Marco Verratti!

Just imagine giving that pucker a good nose job!!!!!!
 

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If you want a free bed for the night I suggest you lower that shitty arsehole of yours onto my face and grind away till I tell you to fucking stop!
 

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You walk into the men's restroom sweetheart and I'll be right behind you! That fucking hole is mine!!!!!
 

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-Any chance of doing a BEFORE and AFTER shoot!?

Your pucker hole before the 100km charity cycle ride and the state of it afterwards!

Then maybe another one after you've been shagged senseless by your teammates!?

-Well if it's all in a good cause it would be churlish not to!
 

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-I need to go and shower baby!

-Let me take the worst off your shitty arsehole with my tongue before you let the shower gel do its work!

-Ok sweetheart! After all my hole belongs to you!
 

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You might be wearing your NORTH FACE jacket but most of us are more interested in what's going on further south!
 

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-How are you getting on mate!?

-Well there's just this massive great crack that needs filling in with polyfilla!

-Yes indeed there is mate! Indeed there is!
 

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Just imagine arriving at the holiday villa you have booked after a long flight and falling into bed dead tired!

You wake up the next morning, pull back the curtains and five of the prettiest boys you have ever seen are standing there with their beautiful arses on display, each one hoping to be chosen for your pre-breakfast fuck or even to remain with you during your whole stay!

Personally mine would be the second from the left!
 

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I watched this horny cunt grinding his dirty smelly arse into that piece of wood for ages but once he'd gone I went over and ran my nose up and down it to savour his shitty aroma!

I'll keep my open for him in future 'cos man is he hot and I need.to sample his chocolate dispenser!!!!
 

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22 year old footballer Elliot Anderson who.plays for Nottingham Forest may not be traditionally handsome but he's got a face which suggests that he bangs like a shithouse door in a gale......!!!
 

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To get the best results from your newly delivered rentboy just follow these easy instructions:

1) Drop to your knees!

2) Approach your nose to arsecrack!

3 Inhale deeply!

4) Ease down Calvins, turn inside out and sniff the seat!

5) Insert nose into bare arsecrack and continue to inhale deeply!

6) Once you are sufficiently hard fuck the shit out of him!!!!!
 

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"I need to go.home and give my bitch a good seeing to!

If you cover my shift this afternoon you can have my dirty socks and pants you pervy little nerd!"
 

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-Great session last night mate! I think i must have left my Calvin's in your bed though!

-Oh you did mate and I've been sniffing them all morning!

Maybe you'd like to come round and collect them later on today then we can carry on where we left off......!
 

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