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Attention Do not feed cum to sunflowers

goldenmoth

goldenmoth

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I was house sitting at this guys place once. Huge mansion. Anyway he wanted me to look after his sunflowers which I did until the last day.

I was super horny and bored and kind of got carried away having a wank near the pool. I didn’t know where else to finish so I aimed at a sunflower. Absolutely covered it.

Anyway the next day I checked on the one I came on and it had wilted everywhere. I thought cum was natural so surely it wouldn’t hurt them too bad.

Anyway, just a heads up in case anyone is thinking of doing that. Not sure if other plants have that problem. Have you ever wanked on a tree or plant and noticed a change?
 
You are a sunflower abuser :lol:
The dark spots on the sunflower might have cameras for revenge of the flower.
 
Sunflowers mostly seeds. It seems you overdosed the flower, or actually deflowered it. Try a "Cumquat."
 
Nope, I can, with all honesty, say I never noticed a damn thing. But then I never considered the results to be something neutral for plants, has to do with bleaching properties.

Although from my younger years, I could heartily recommend aloe leaves split down the sideshow. A half-frozen cuke has a very interesting texture but not real versatile, lacks a base, obv. But other than that, nah.
 
How odd.

You were asked to take care of your host's sunflowers and you ejaculated on them. Remind me to never ask you to babysit children.

As a footnote, covering any plants leaves with a film could affect leaf function, so that's probably nothing unique to sperm.
 
NotHardUp1 said:
How odd.

You were asked to take care of your host's sunflowers and you ejaculated on them. Remind me to never ask you to babysit children.

As a footnote, covering any plants leaves with a film could affect leaf function, so that's probably nothing unique to sperm.
Click to expand...

Ejaculating into houseplants is a time honored practice of sexual predators in Hollywood and other corridors of power. I do not recall reading about the effect it has on the plants.
 
Awww, come on. Cite a reference or be disbelieved. What database is there anywhere about an overlap between sexual predators, Hollywood, and houseplants?

And, who uses "time-honored" about supposed sexual deviance? Who?

"There is a time honored practice of strangling the whore with her own panty hose after beating and raping her on a deserted road." Really, time "honored"?
 
NotHardUp1 said:
Awww, come on. Cite a reference or be disbelieved. What database is there anywhere about an overlap between sexual predators, Hollywood, and houseplants?

And, who uses "time-honored" about supposed sexual deviance? Who?

"There is a time honored practice of strangling the whore with her own panty hose after beating and raping her on a deserted road." Really, time "honored"?
Click to expand...

Harvey Weinstein jerked off into a potted plant.
 
NotHardUp1 said:
Awww, come on. Cite a reference or be disbelieved. What database is there anywhere about an overlap between sexual predators, Hollywood, and houseplants?

And, who uses "time-honored" about supposed sexual deviance? Who?

"There is a time honored practice of strangling the whore with her own panty hose after beating and raping her on a deserted road." Really, time "honored"?
Click to expand...

It's more like a Venn diagram. CK Toback Clinton. Ok sometimes a dress, a sink, pants, stood in for the houseplant. The common intersection is the abused and the powerful abuser. Yes a database is called for.
 
I can think of about fifty better places for it than "on the sunflowers". And don't sunflowers grow pretty damn high? In that case, well done, sir. :)

Lex
 
It was a warm, sunny day and I was naked in the garden, masturbating in among my wang peonies and just as I was about to jizz, a hummingbird landed on my dick, looked me in the eye and shook his head, shaming me out of the garden. It was then I noticed how inviting the cantelopes were looking.....
 
A lesser man writes his name in the snow with urine. A real man uses ejaculate.

Lex
 
goldenmoth said:
I was house sitting at this guys place once. Huge mansion. Anyway he wanted me to look after his sunflowers which I did until the last day.

I was super horny and bored and kind of got carried away having a wank near the pool. I didn’t know where else to finish so I aimed at a sunflower. Absolutely covered it.

Anyway the next day I checked on the one I came on and it had wilted everywhere. I thought cum was natural so surely it wouldn’t hurt them too bad.

Anyway, just a heads up in case anyone is thinking of doing that. Not sure if other plants have that problem. Have you ever wanked on a tree or plant and noticed a change?
Click to expand...

That was my prize-winning sunflower, too!
 
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