Do self loathing gay and bisexual people give the gay community a bad reputation?

[mega]

How do self loathing people expect other people to respect them. Should self destructive people who want to drag everyone else down with them be tolerated?

 

[Centexfarmer]

How do self loathing people expect other people to respect them. Should self destructive people who want to drag everyone else down with them be tolerated?

To question one, they're not looking for respect, they're looking for affirmation for their self-loathing.

To question two, the answer is no. They shouldn't be tolerated, but since most of them make up our clergy, elected officials, and ex-boyfriends, what are you going to do?

 

[The_Reaper]

I don't think self loathing, as long as it not:

Some one who is viruently anti-gay, and then is caught in some shocking scandal afterwards.


Is detrimental to the gay community.


Rather, I'd say sterotypical aspects of the gay lifestyle give the bad name. With the exception of mannerisms which are not a choice, such as a lisp or other speech impediments.

 

[kallipolis]

There appears to be an epidemic of such negative behaviour appearing on this board. The Winter holiday season predictably reveals the frustrations of life among many lonely people, and not just the homosexual person. Christmas is for merriment, in order to ward off weather related lows. I note that many postings express "hate" for this time of the year. Short term merry making is a medicine for countering depression ,and all its association with self destructive behaviour.

The most rewarding therapy for Winter's ills is always found in our willingness to seek out those in greater need than our self and help them. We soon discover what a privileged life we live, despite our many misgivings on our perceived sense of lack of happiness and fulfilment.

 

[BrandonSBCA]

Reparative therapy?

Didn't you just say that?

 

[Nonimus]

Yes, but everyone seems to have missed the uproarious humour of it, so, I thought I'd give them another chance.

Plus, I like the word reparative.

yes but reparative can be repetative if you recurrently reiterate it.

 

[Paws]

To question one, they're not looking for respect, they're looking for affirmation for their self-loathing.

They are looking for someone to motivate them because they have been hurt by others.

 

[GL]

To question one, they're not looking for respect, they're looking for affirmation for their self-loathing.

Agreed.

To question two, the answer is no. They shouldn't be tolerated, but since most of them make up our clergy, elected officials, and ex-boyfriends, what are you going to do?

Can we shoot them into space? The sun isn't too far away when you compare it to say... Pluto.

 

[Soilwork]

I will say I did get a kick out of being told I should stop being so gay by a bisexual man from Norway.

Seeing people come on here and spend all their time blaming others that they can't come out makes me ill.

Having to see people making dumb-ass statements like "Are you straight-acting or drag?" makes me want to break femurs.

I remember last year I posted something about how much fun I had at the LA pride parade, and of course it was immediatly flooded by all the self-haters saying things like "To all those people prancing through the streets and shouting that they're gay off the rooftops...." or "I don't feel the need to run up to everyone and tell them who I'm sleeping with" or some nonsense like that.

But let's not forget that most of them don't have the balls to come out anyway.. so they just make it look like there's more straight cowards than gay.

So I'm going to say "no" to the question.

 

[sb]

Mostly no... cos the self loathing fags are usually busy doing things in their closet. So they can't give the gay community a bad reputation when they are too gutless to actually be a part of it.

The few that are actually out of the closet probably make us look a little bad when they do things like run around and tell me people we shouldn't get special rights because they don't have the brain capacity to figure out that we want to be treated as equal not special.

I also get absolutely sick of those who say things like 'straight people don't have a parade yadda yadda'..... it would be good if they could come up with something original but I guess they are too busy hating themselves to think up something new.

 

[metta]

Is this about Gay-bashing homo Congressman David Drier?

http://dreier.house.gov/

 

[metta]

Or Maybe it is about Gay-bashing homo Mark Foley???


http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mark_Foley

 

[zakattack]

Yes, because they generally know less about the gay community and gay history. They tend to be more critical of sub-cultures within the gay community, therefore making themselves vulnerable to the judgement of the rest of the gay community. They are less likely to do anything but criticize the gay rights movement because they are so afraid of being seen as gay. They tend to worry more about what straight people think of them. They are less likely to be visible about their entire self at work or anyplace outside their immediate friends. They tend to think being gay is only about sex.

 

[ladygrey]

Pooh heads.

I've given up. Other's are right: they simply looking for validation of the hate filled inner existance of their worlds.

So poohie poop heads on them.

I still rememeber that scene from "Big Eden" where the grandfather asks his son if "Did we ever teach you shame? Because it would break my heart if we did."

 

[Evsann]

Gery:

This...

does [strike]oftem[/strike] often seem to lead to seeking out this...

doesn't it?

I often find myself wondering why some of these guys haven't joined an Exodus International forum rather than JUB. Or maybe they did and they're [strike]"plants"[/strike] moles seeking [strike]converts[/strike] new candidates.

It's funny. My mother actually mentioned them when I told her about lifetime yearning to be female. I explained nicely to her why they did not interest me but in my head I was like, "Why in Gods name would I need a support group to hate and lie to myself when I have been succesfully pulling it off for the last 12 or so years"

I have not lost my religion but I have long since taken the politics out of it. The Idea that god would not allow man to taint his ministry should have been thrown out after the first Century of the Catholic church. It is actually quite sad that Intelligent people can still find peace with that argument.

 

[Rand]

There are self loathing people of all races, religions, creeds and sexual orientations

They are the alcoholics, the addicts and the abusers
they have been taught to hate themselves for various reasons

some may have the ability to change their attitudes
but to do so requires they accept themselves as they are

-------------------------------------------
and why are you all being so hard on the republicans?????LOL

 

[luminum]

I just think they're afraid of something, so I feel bad for them. And it's always a kick in the teeth to hear about how we should be tolerant of viewpoints that advocate being less tolerant of others. Aren't we doing exactly what you want, only not to the people you want us to?

I think self-loathers just seek approval from conservatives who feel the same way as a means of excusing them for being different. Almost apologetic. And I think that hurts the movement because it affirms the idea that conservatives have that we as a community are unstable, that we can't even stand ourselves, and that we don't want to be the way we are.

And why should we make excuses for other people? Why do we have to explain other people's actions? If conservatives are looking for answers, they should engage those who they take issue with, isntead of getting it from someone who clearly doesn't understand those people. It's like a black man whose every word against the black community becomes valid because he's black, though he may never understand what it's like to grow up black and oppressed in the ghetto.