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Do you care about your boyfriend's sexual history?

blahman16

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Assuming he is clean/no diseases, do you mind if he has hooked up with a lot of people before? or do you prefer he has done it a lot so he knows what to do while having sex?
 
Hmm, that's a strange question. Do you mind that he's been around or if he's good in bed because he has been around?

Well, getting around has nothing to do with your performance in the sack - However from personal experience I have discovered that some of the lousiest lovers are the ones who have slept around so much that they are robots during sex. No imagination or romance or passion just in and out etc.

Now does that make me think that every very sexually active guy is a lousy lover well heck no but I don't think I'd want to know if a guy slept with 500 people before he met me. And I really hate it when you go out and he knows more than half the guys in the club and you overhear that he's slept with a lot of assholes.
 
Well, yes. And not for the reason you'd think.

If the person has been with only one or two people, I may be a bit hesitant.

I'd prefer someone who has sowed it oats a bit.
 
I would be lying if I said it didn't bother me that my boyfriend has a much more extensive history than I, but I just say that if he had known me back then he would never ave given those other people the time of day. Besides, it's the past; if you spend all your time focused on the past you're going to miss the present and probabably fuck up the future too.

The part that worries me is that I've always been serially monogamous, but he's gone back and forth between monogamy and ho-bag-ness. Who knows, though. I could be the one who makes it stick. You just can't worry yourself about these things to the point that it takes away from making your partner happy and enjoying being with them.
 
As long as he can be faithful to me once we're together, I don't care if he blew a whole college football team the day before we met.
 
This is an insecurity issue. If it bothers you that your boyfriend has been with a certain number of people, it's probably because you yourself haven't been with enough people. If you had, you would be more secure. People are entitled to lives before meeting you. If this really bothers you, you don't belong in the relationship and need to find someone else. I learned this from experience, when I was younger I wanted a perfect relationship and it made me mad the person I was seeing and very into had been around a bit. The problem wasn't his, it was mine.
 
I don't think I would necessarily care --more like, I'd be interested in the types of guys he may have dated before, because I'm interested in him.
 
As for the last question, I don't care how much experience he has, I've fallen in love with him without knowing details and I think that is the right way.

And as for details, we don't tell each other what we did with guys, but when he see someone or talk about someone one of us had been before, we are used to inform the each other that we had him and how much was done, because it's much better then finding out from some gossiping queer.

Only problem is I feel kinda like bitch, because I was with like ten times more guys :-[
 
I do care. Not that it matters, but I am curious just to know what he has done in the past and other times I find it very hot when he tells me things he's done in the past
 
Unless it comes a'callin' I couldn't give a good god dam.

In fact I prefer men with experience.
 
I was curious about it, but he didn't want to go into graphic detail, so I didn't pry. Let's just say whoever taught him did a great job. :)

Lex
 
Everyone has a sexual past. As long as he has had recent STD testing, it's otherwise irrelevant.

It's more revealing to know about romantic history- who he dated, why they broke up and whether the break ups were amicable or ugly.
 
For me its about a journey.

Every bodies past brings them to who they are today, and that includes their sexual history. Their experiences and life lessons helped them be themselves.

Is it my first thought? No. Would I pry? No. Does it change things? No.

But would I listen and be interested if he told me about it or it came up? Yes. Becasue thats whats made him the guy I love now.
 
Every bodies past brings them to who they are today, and that includes their sexual history. Their experiences and life lessons helped them be themselves.

Well said, and why I prefer guys to have some road under their feet.
 
When I first met "My" Kev, he was a very popular bartender in the local "gay scene". Had he had more experience than me? Well ... Gay-wise, no doubt! But, he'd never been with a girl, which I had enjoyed more than my "fair share" of! ..|

So ... as far as overall "numbers" went, we were about equal, though He had more Guys than I did! #-o

But, you know what? His rather substantial history was one of the things that attracted me to him! I mean, given his "successes", I wasn't the only one that thought he was "Hot"! (!w!)

In Our case, Experience was a Plus! And, we had many different things to teach each other! Not to mention, the stories have always been Entertaining, too!! (Even after 27yr. together!) (!)

Keep smilin'!! :kiss:(*8*)
Chaz :luv:
 
My boyfriend's history does bother me. And its probably mostly my fault. Part of it is insecurity. Part of it is the fact that he had way more guys than I did. We're in our 20's. In the beginning of our relationship, it seemed like he was not with that many guys, but as time went on, he opened about more and more of his hook ups and different guys he's have casual sex with. I don't think it's anything out of the ordinary - most 18-22 year olds probably are like that. But I never experienced that 'era' in my life and it bothers me a lot. We've been together for a long time and he's the one for me, but it still bothers me a lot inside. I hate feeling that way.

Do you guys think a 'hooking up' time period is a necessity for every guy before they get into a real serious relationship?
 
The only thing I care about is if the guy has cheated before. That's a big NO for me. I don't really care how many guys he has had sex with...because I am not about to have sex with him until I feel a little bit of trust. Unless it's one of those where I don't care about trust and we both know exactly what it is.
 
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