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Do you like the term husband used for male spouse?

OH that's so hetero.

I am hetero. (*8*)

No, I think that's SO history. Throughout our lifetime, we've always known "husband" to mean a man that is legally married to a woman. Once we change our antique marriage laws, and I believe we will, the meaning of husband will change.

It's a been a big discussion here as some gay men have expressed that getting legally married will change the whole meaning of a gay relationships and for the worse. Expecting your "partner" to be faithful, settling down, having kids/adopting kids, and even divorce will be the doom of gay relationships. Just imagine two men in a divorce proceeding. I think that's a silly stereotype myself, divorce proceedings are often laughable regardless of gender or sexuality, but they've made me think.
 
The lack of words for it kinda puts me in a rut - I don't like "partner" and my boyfrie... partner? doesn't like boyfriend. I don't like the term boyfriend either, as it sounds like we're in middle school and just had our first kiss on the cheek... but like others said, partner is so. stale. and just doesn't sound romantic or like it has any depth to it. Just makes me think of partner in crime. I wish there were a word in between

How about boypart. As in “I love my boypart, but we don’t get to do as much as we would like together anymore. Sometime I wish I was younger again.”



:jk: And probably not as funny as I think.
 
The boy has called me his partner a couple of times but usually we are just using "boyfriend" right now.

He surprised me the other night talking about marriage. I'm still not sure about that.....
 
I wanna find a 'boyfriend' and make him my 'husband'! :D
 
do you like the term used husband for spale mouse? What?
 
Jay and I are together... We are seriously dating... He is my boyfriend. Until such time as we decide to head towards marriage then he becomes my fiancee then my husband.

I will instantly correct anyone and everyone who refers to either of us as "partners." To me it's another of those words created to separate us from them. Like the words "civil union" and "lifestyle". All 3 of those words drip with condescension.
 
If you are married, he is your husband. If you are not married, he is whatever you decide to call each other. I love the idea of being able to call my boyfriend "husband" in a better and more legal world.

It will take ages before "husband" is legal in Missouri. Bah.
 
any term is OK with me. in colombia, compañero is very common - which I like - also pareja, which also can mean couple. compañero is really close to partner - in the couple sense
ding
 
Well, it's expected to be polite and courteous in the north, too! Calling each other "Sir" just isn't part of that.

In New York it's considered more polite not to look at people at all if they're strangers. The New Yorker is always surrounded by people, so the illusion of being alone is valued. I take it this would be considered rude in much of the south, but it's actually a mode of courtesy in NYC and environs.

Courtesy is a common urge everywhere, but the things that are rude or courteous are almost arbitrary, they vary so widely.

So, where you are, what does a Dom call another Dom's boy? Or is he supposed to not notice him at all?

I never thought of that. But then again I've never been to new york before. And even if you wanna be alone in the south people are still gonna say hi to you and be courteous. Of course, it doesn't take much to be a bastard and scare people off.

I just never knew how a different region can change things like common courtesy. Hell I think in france everyone greets each other by kissing one another on the cheek. Even men. They don't think it's homosexual or sick. But if that was done here lots of people would be offended by it.

Other countries, states, regions, probably have their own idea of what courtesy is and what isn't courtesy as well. I guess it's just. When you live in the south all your life and people are polite and say things like, "Sir and Maam" it's easy to believe that it's done in every state. But apparently not. I guess the world is alot bigger.

Right. That's another thing. Protocols and different variations on how people live the leather lifestyle or show their flags are different in different regions. And they still fight over the color code things T_T"

Uhm. Generally the way it works here anyways is that a dom asks the boys dom for permission to speak with the boy or slave. Not all do it but it's common courtesy to do so. And then the dom's boy is usually referred to as boy or sub. I've never heard another dom call another dom's boy slave. But not everyone follows the protocols and believes in old guard style.

Some believe that boys are just meat where you grab a boy's ass, bend him over, grab his crotch, or force their will on another boy that might not be their own and even someone elses.

Especially at bar's that happens. Things like respect of another person and respecting someone's boundaries don't generally exist. But in this circle of few old guard masters and slaves that I am getting familar with someone usually asks my Sir permission to talk to me or give me a goodbye hug or something.

Each master has their own beliefs though. Some masters will lend their boy's to stranger's, friends, or give their slave or sub less freedom or more freedom. It all depends on their view and generally what works best with the sub.
 
Husband is the proper term after marriage. Before that the right word is "fiancé," with just one "é."
 
To be truthful, in my realm, gay male couples abound. They're all over. And none of them refers to their better half as my "husband." The all say "partner," particulalry when giving public addresses, which many do: "And I'd like to thank my 'partner' Charles, and our kids, for allowing me to be here with you tonight..."
 
Jay and I are together... We are seriously dating... He is my boyfriend. Until such time as we decide to head towards marriage then he becomes my fiancee then my husband.

I will instantly correct anyone and everyone who refers to either of us as "partners." To me it's another of those words created to separate us from them. Like the words "civil union" and "lifestyle". All 3 of those words drip with condescension.

The crux of this whole discussion for me is I don't see us as being identical to them. Heterosexuality and its attendant mating rituals, traditions, and institutions, terminology: they own it. We are hoping to appropriate it for our own purposes. We are copying them, and for no good reason.

We don't have to ape them.

Gay couples mimicking the heterosexual model is not my idea of progress.
 
Ugh. I am really tired of the whole.

"Oh we are just an average gay couple. We are commited to each other, we make a steady income, we are healthy and happy, and we are happily married. We are just the opposite of a heterosexual couple"

There is nothing wrong with being gay, partnered, and happy but we don't have to mirror heterosexuals. My parents do it and it's somewhat irritating. I really like gay couples who act more like themselves then those who try so hard to act like normal straight couples.

There is no, "The term for male spouse is "partner", no excuses".

It's whatever the hell you want it to be. A relationship is whatever the hell you want it to be. You live together with someone you can stick a giant penis on your roof as decoration or make the house pink and create rainbows around it and wear boas, leather, or be nudists.

You don't have to be so plain and boring and watch your law and order and go to bed at 9 pm each night and wake up at 7 pm.
 
The crux of this whole discussion for me is I don't see us as being identical to them. Heterosexuality and its attendant mating rituals, traditions, and institutions, terminology: they own it. We are hoping to appropriate it for our own purposes. We are copying them, and for no good reason.

We don't have to ape them.

Gay couples mimicking the heterosexual model is not my idea of progress.


While I understand what you are saying I have to disagree... All those terms I originally mentioned (lifestyle, partner, civil unions) those are all things to make us separate but equal... much the same way as it was back in the day for black folks before their civil rights were awarded to them.

The point isn't we are different so we need different terms ... last time I checked we were all still human whether black, white, gay, straight, or whatever. We don't need all these different terms to separate us from everyone else when we are just trying to be normal.
 
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