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Do you remind yourself to be nice?

No. I many times will think things and then not say them, as I consider what gain there is to be made versus merely saying things to hear truth spoken, but knowing it will have no effect. Having experienced too many times others just waiting to talk, I do make it a point to listen as long as possible without interrupting.

At work, I'm seeing an increasing pattern among the do-littles of never speaking out at all, not even in meetings where team inputs are supposedly the objective. And in all interdepartmental interactions, I see more and more of no expectation of competence, duty, diligence, or accountability. Raising it is even seen as an affront.

In personal matters, away from work, courtesy is more cut and dried usually, and prevails with no impediments. I have at times stood up for the customer when dealing with business staff when there was abuse or neglect, but that is the exception.

In general, I'm less and less likely to allow sloth and lies to substitute for work and truth, so do call it down much more often than when I was 20, 30, 40, or 50. But, on balance, I also do random acts of kindness and generosity much more than before, and give less to institutions.
 
I'm a nice guy but I have a blunt and direct manner sometimes, which can be misinterpreted as rudeness. I try to keep it in check.
 
Remind myself to be nice? No. To be polite, yes. I get accused of "being too honest" and I'm like fuck that I'm not lying about anything.

And if you, as a customer, when I worked at bartending or Circle-K or HEB or where ever, you wanna get stupid with me? I can politely give it back times ten.

I was looking when I got the job and getting fired was never a fear. I don't take shit from customers beyond a point.

Yep, I've been called rude. And yet, at HEB when I was a checker, folks would get in my line because I was fast and didn't do the "how this weather?" and "interact with the customer and ask if they found everything".... because it's either they did or they gave up.

Sometimes folks would ask if we had whatever. I knew if we did or not. Oh, you want a box of barley? One or two boxes? And I would trot off to get it. Barley was not in the aisle with stuff like rice and beans and the like. Nope, very top shelf on the edge of the canned soup section. The grocery manager knew we had 10 boxes in stock but no idea where. :)
 
You can’t be honest and nice.
 
Sometimes being nice is the wrong thing to do. When Jehovahs Witness come to the the door ,if you are nice you'll never get rid of them. It is kinder to tell them to fuck off right from the start, that way you are saving them from wasting their time as well as from wasting your own time.
 
The Jehovahs Witness folks would come by the house in Austin. They were nice enough. Just out trying to convert sinners and all that. Real easy on the eyes, too. So I'd get a couple of Watch Towers and a subscription that lasted a few months.

Once I was home sick. Sitting around in my Jockeys... that are like Speedos. Nose is red and raw from the handkerchief. The doorbell rang and uh, yeah, I do like talking to y'all but I'm home sick today. So, not today, ok?

Ever after they would cross the street when walking past my house. Which was weird but then it became funny.
 
Most of the time, I am naturally kind and polite with no effort. Only when someone tries my patience, do I have to make an effort to be nice.
 
I guess I don't remind myself...I never really thought about it. But I think I'm nice to others. I can think of one guy who was often an ass towards me...because he didn't like the line of work I was in. I did not shed a tear when he committed suicide a few years later.
 
Is that what the voices in my head are trying to tell me?

To be nice?

There's probably a med that'll take care of this.
 
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