Does he like me or is he clowning?

[goodbadenergy]

Sorry this is long. I posted it in the main forum, and got flamed, so i want to get your guy's opinion here. I met this guy at school. Very pretty eyes. we became friends, and he started kind of flirting with me a little bit. He rubbed the hair on my arm once, he likes to poke me and touch me, and he came up behind me and blew on my neck to surprise me once. He doesnt know im gay, and i dont IF know he is. He grins ear to ear when he sees me, smiles alot, and doesnt hold eye contact for very long. He also asked me once to put my hands in his pockets to get something out for him. I gave me a pen and said "you are gonna take it and you are gonna like it!" I caught him staring at me once, and he held the gaze for a second and looked away shyly when i noticed. He also looks at my mouth, hair and profile alot. At school, when we had to lift something up onto a wall for a project, he kept grinding his head into my chest. He also texts me and asks when i am gonna see him again. He also quoted that song "what in the butt" and said "i want you to put it in my butt". He also came up to me and whispered "my butt cheeks are so tight". Another thing he did was when he saw something written down, he said "did your boyfriend right this?". In a group conversation he looks at me alot to see if i am laughing, and laughs at all my jokes. one thing i dont get: there was a hot girl at school, like, really hot, and he wanted to "compete" with me to see if i could get her. He hung out with her a couple of times, and she texted him and said "when is our next date?" he texted her back and said "friends dont date". He also seems to keep telling me that he is "avoiding her" and hasnt talked to her in like 2 weeks. remember this girl is HOTT. he obviously doesnt care about hooking up with her, or her feelings. Maybe hes testing me? When he is around a big group of other dudes, he acts straight and talks about hott girls, yet refuses to take it any further. I also saw him looking at my butt, and once he bent over to get something by my package and said "i'm not going for your junk". He'll also say stuff like "i'm gonna go make out with brian!" and "i dont bend down because i'm afraid someone will come up to me and say 'im gonna give it to you good!!" He said to me once "your as straight as a rainbow i bet" and "were you trying to get me alone!?! what did you think i want to do with you (as in sex)..." I also put my hand up to my mouth to cough and i guess it looked like i was sucking a dick , because he said "do that again" in a very suggestive way. He also has given me the "suggestive" look and put his finger up to his mouth. He did that once. here is an example of a greeting/exchange between us: HIM: "There she is! Hey princess!" me: "Hey young lady!" him: "hows it goin miss!" he also said "hey goldilocks!" to this blond chick when i was walking behind him and then he said "No! I was talking to him!" (I have blondish hair). He also kind of complimented my eyes, he said "do you have green eyes? (studies them a little bit) No, they are more turquoise". The only other people that have said something like that about my eyes are an ex bf. he also will come see me and talk to me at the 1st chance, even when he was talking to me, someone walking by said to him, "you just cant stay away can you" and he looked at me and laughed. he was watching me once, and i did and said something so funny (that wasnt intentional) and i looked over at him and he turned beet red. He seems to pick fun at my small stature (hes small in stature too wtf). I responded by saying "i'm a tank dude!" and he said "yeah, a hot wheels tank!"

 

[bw92116]

He's gay and he wants you. Make a date with him for tomorrow night.
Then after that date, post here to let us know what happened.

 

[goodbadenergy]

He's gay and he wants you. Make a date with him for tomorrow night.
Then after that date, post here to let us know what happened.

did you read what i posted? i think he knows im gay with the "straight as a rainbow" comment". I saw him today as he was leaving and when he saw me he immedietly came up to me and started talking and looking shyly into my eyes, just about how his day was and a new video game he bought. We are both 22 by the way.

 

[bw92116]

Yes I read the whole thing. He's gay and he wants you. Make a date with him for tomorrow night. Then after the date report on it here, hopefully with photos and video to illustrate everything that happened.

 

[goodbadenergy]

Yes I read the whole thing. He's gay and he wants you. Make a date with him for tomorrow night. Then after the date report on it here, hopefully with photos and video to illustrate everything that happened.

i dont think you are being serious lol

 

[backpacker]

I think he is being serious.

The guy has been hinting that he is gay for a long time. By hinting, I mean slapping you up side the head with a 2x4. The question is, what have you done to let him know you are gay. Your assuming he knows by the comment that you are as straight as a rainbow. That clearly says he suspects, but it doesn't sound like you have done anything to confirm it. If you don't make a move soon he'll probably lose interest.

The next time he makes a sexual comment about you, you need to take the opening and respond. For example, if he says "I'm not going for your package", you respond "why not?" If he comments on his tight ass, you say "I'll be the judge of that."

Of course it would be a lot easier to just ask him out, but something tells me you won't do that. You could invite him to study together with you and see where it goes. It sounds like you need some one-on-one time with him. Good luck and report back.

 

[goodbadenergy]

he has done nothing to confirm either...... thats what im worried about. Im also tired of playing this silly game and want to take it further. Maybe hes looking for a boyfriend?

 

[goodbadenergy]

also, if you ask him about past relationships, or stuff hes done with girls he always says "i'm not that kind of guy". or "im very reserved and i need to be dating for like 2 months before i'll even kiss" excuses excuses. Every straight guy is that kind of guy, espescially if i comes to hott chicks. he akwardly comments about women that are barbie dolls, and watches my reaction. “Look at that ass — yeah, boy, that’s what I’m talkin’ about!" haha from what i know of him he scores an A+ on every single one of these http://www.thefrisky.com/2009-02-07/nine-signs-hes-gay/

 

[goodbadenergy]

do you think my chances are good, and i should start flirting back? Someone that knows him said "hes acting pretty gay today" but when hes in a group of straight guys he acts like he licks chicks. he told me about a party he went to and said "there were alot of cute girls there". maybe hes bi....

 

[altlover85]

He's gay and he wants you. Make a date with him for tomorrow night.
Then after that date, post here to let us know what happened.

This would be the most direct route and would quickly clear up anything that's murky between the two of you.

The question is, what have you done to let him know you are gay. Your assuming he knows by the comment that you are as straight as a rainbow. That clearly says he suspects, but it doesn't sound like you have done anything to confirm it. If you don't make a move soon he'll probably lose interest.

The next time he makes a sexual comment about you, you need to take the opening and respond. For example, if he says "I'm not going for your package", you respond "why not?" If he comments on his tight ass, you say "I'll be the judge of that."

You could invite him to study together with you and see where it goes. It sounds like you need some one-on-one time with him. Good luck and report back.

Alternatively you could do what backpacker suggests.

The main point is to show him that you are interested in him and then see what he does. He could be straight (doubtful from what you've told us), he could be bi or he could be gay, but you'll never know until you make some sort of move.

You might be afraid of losing him as a friend, but I can't imagine it feel that great to be in limbo the way you two are presently.

 

[goodbadenergy]

This would be the most direct route and would quickly clear up anything that's murky between the two of you.



Alternatively you could do what backpacker suggests.

The main point is to show him that you are interested in him and then see what he does. He could be straight (doubtful from what you've told us), he could be bi or he could be gay, but you'll never know until you make some sort of move.

You might be afraid of losing him as a friend, but I can't imagine it feel that great to be in limbo the way you two are presently.

i have never had any friend that is straight that has said those kind of things to me. The smiling and the eye contact that me an him convey to eachother (he grins ear to ear and looks at my shyly) might be a giveaway. Also when he came up to me and flicked the hair on my arm with his index finger and said "if i was a girl i would do this to him!" Also, i did kind of ask him out via text when i was drunk once and he said "you texted me at 4 am and asked me if i wanted to see a movie with you.... you were drunk and werent in your right mind, but i didnt mind it". we kind of forgot that happened. I know for a fact he hates alcohol.

 

[Rolyo85]

Confronting him in a friendly way is the best course. You'll save yourself lost time and feelings and the result won't be different than if you just pine after him for months...

 

[goodbadenergy]

i am too afraid to do anything right now. Some days hes super friendly and some days he totally ignores me or makes fun of me a little bit. Do you think the chances are good that he is gay?

 

[Rolyo85]

Either way you're gonna get obsessed over it. I know it's scary, but it's better to tell him you're gay and his flirting kinda impacts you more than he might think, and that you need to know if there's anything behind it. Do it soon, it's not gonna get easier with time...

 

[Seasoned]

Next time he flirts come out to him by saying that he sounds just like your old boyfriend.

 

[shainski]

He's afraid to go too far with you, and you're afraid to go too far with him. So how is this stalemate going to end?

I think you should take his playful banter and raise it exactly as backpacker suggests.

 

[bw92116]

The "game" phase of it could go on forever if you let it. Is that all you want, the teasing and the "game?"

 

[Robbert]

I agree with Seasoned it's not a confession just keep it cool and easy dont get over stressed

 

[goodbadenergy]

good advice guys, thanks. i get to see him tomorrow. any tips?

 

[bw92116]

Next time he says or does something flirtatious, take him aside for a minute. Look directly in his eyes and speak in a calm and serious but gentle and non-threatening voice. "Come over tonight to my place and we'll make love like real men." That's all you need to say, nothing more. Don't laugh or anything, show him that you are serious.

He may freak out and run away, or he may be impressed by your self-assurance and balls. Either he will come over and it will happen for real, and you'll have a great time and you can report back here with the details afterwards... or, he'll get scared and it won't happen - but, at least you will have put an end to the silly games and wasted time.