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Eliminating sexual desire

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Quarkesd

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Hi, I'm gay, in early thirties, not very good looking, kinda fat and balding. Last sex I had was 6 years ago.

I would really like to make myself completely asexual so I don't have any sexual desires or libido whatsoever. How can this be accomplished without outright castration but in a low maintenance, healthy way?
I would really like to hear from other people who did this or consider doing it..

I really need to make any sexual thoughts or feelings go away forever.

Please don't talk about anything else.
 
As far as I know there is no way to remove all sexual desires, even with castration. Maybe some heavy drugs but those are going to be some pretty debilitating chems!

Gym-buzzcut-therapist (or become a monk).
 
Please don't talk about anything else.
Click to expand...

Then what's the point? Ask a moderator to move this thread to the health and well being forum, and/or mark it on-topic discussion...

But I'll tell you, you'll have an easier time making the rain go away than divorcing yourself from sexual desires.

Is masturbation not enough? You don't have to be sexually active with another person.

It seems as if you see yourself as deficient, and instead of addressing what you consider problems you're looking for a path of action to negate a problem existing. But even if you are successful at reducing your sexual impulses, those things you consider problems will manifest themselves into other aspects of your life. Next it will be roadblocks to friendship and then social interaction at all.
 
fetaby said:
It seems as if you see yourself as deficient, and instead of addressing what you consider problems you're looking for a path of action to negate a problem existing. But even if you are successful at reducing your sexual impulses, those things you consider problems will manifest themselves into other aspects of your life. Next it will be roadblocks to friendship and then social interaction at all.
Click to expand...

^^ what he said.

Also with a massive reduction in sexual energy, no libido for masturbation etc, you also increase the risk of prostate cancer.
 
For me natural sexual thoughts and feelings that everyone has are a huge source of frustration, anxiety and distraction. Surely I am not the first person to think about this.

And no, cosmetic changes are not gonna solve anything(they certainly can't make me younger), I need to dump this part of my life as garbage.

What about drugs they give to pedophiles or something, how would one get around to acquiring them? Medicine must have evolved since then, inhibiting glands and such that produce this garbage...
 
Quarkesd said:
For me natural sexual thoughts and feelings that everyone has are a huge source of frustration, anxiety and distraction. Surely I am not the first person to think about this.

And no, cosmetic changes are not gonna solve anything(they certainly can't make me younger), I need to dump this part of my life as garbage.

What about drugs they give to pedophiles or something, how would one get around to acquiring them? Medicine must have evolved since then, inhibiting glands and such that produce this garbage...
Click to expand...

Chemical castration will not eliminate your sexual desire.
 
I think if you exercised, lost weight you'd have a healthier respect for your body and appearance. The negative feelings would lessen and you might change your mind.

Besides whas wrong with just masterbating? That too is healthy for you, and tests have proven it decreases your chances of testicular cancer.
 
Quarkesd said:
Last time I checked there is no cure for aging and systematic decrepitude.
Why would I prolong addressing this?
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And the last time I checked ugly people were fucking like bunnies.

There's a lot of mess going on with you but you need to take a second and open yourself to the possibility that what you're thinking is only in your own head.

I don't think it's having sexual desire that is bothering you. It's the lack of sexual contact.

It seems you are thinking that no one will have sex with you so you may as well not want to have sex with anyone else.

Answer this question, do you masturbate?
 
kallipolis said:
Chemical castration will not eliminate your sexual desire.
Click to expand...

Why not?
wouldn't you eliminate the biological source of such feelings and in time they would puff away without being able to feed from that source?
 
It seems as if you are placing an undue amount of value to achieving sexual contact.
 
The challenge that you are facing is one of changing your perspective of who you are, and who you can become by changing the way you live your life.

There are many people who face a mid life crisis and resolve to make the necessary changes that will enable them to shed their negative perspective of their life.

Learn to eat healthily. Slowly shed fat over a period of say, twelve months. Begin physical exercise, such as daily brisk walks.

Self respect is an investment in our life's well being when we choose not to accept our current condition, and resolve to take actions to put right, all that we know is wrong with our life.

Surrender to depression will not solve your current dilemma.
 
Quarkesd said:
Why not?
wouldn't you eliminate the biological source of such feelings and in time they would puff away without being able to feed from that source?
Click to expand...

That's a medieval way of viewing sexual psychology. And everyone knows the biggest sex organ is your brain.

So are you asking for a lobotomy?
 
Quarkesd said:
Why not?
wouldn't you eliminate the biological source of such feelings and in time they would puff away without being able to feed from that source?
Click to expand...

Chemical castration does not eliminate your thoughts, feelings and responses to stimuli.

Preventing an erection will not eliminate your sexual thoughts.
 
I think you might want to see a psychologist first. I do believe there are some underlying issues here, and those are your real problem. apart from that, the lack of sexual desire probably will lead to a whole lot of other problems. almost everything in our body and mind is closely tight into all the other functions.


(thread moved to h&w)
 
there is no cure for aging and systematic decrepitude
Click to expand...

Everyone ages, and everyone's body slows down, metabolism, hair loss, age spots, etc. etc. etc.

But how is this a problem for you and not for everyone else?

Cause I can guarantee you that everyone else is not thinking of stopping the sexual self in spite of the natural aging process.

If anything the advent of erectile disfunction medications, viagra, cialis, etc., speaks to the contrary.
 
A lot of psych meds are known to reduce libido; and then there's physical labor, and staying super busy, channeling that energy into different pursuits. Reducing the amount of time you spend on sexual ideation, such as giving up porn and reading more elevating literature, can help too.

But really, nobody has really spent much time working on realistic ways to quell sexual desire... it's more marketable to increase it. Most of the research done into reducing sexual desire has been based in torture of various kinds, due to the researchers' own prejudices and the phobias of those who fund such research.

I don't have sex with people, and haven't in almost fifteen years. I don't think I'm porn material, I wouldn't date me... but neither do I break mirrors; I'm simply a lot happier without the pursuit or even the idea of the pursuit. Sometimes I yearn for physical conact, or even romance, because really that's just human nature; but it passes, much as my cravings for salty snacks or entire chocolate cakes pass eventually.

You're still young yet... early thirties isn't biologically "decrepitude"... that happens in your latter forties. And your desires will become more comfortable and familiar as you get older... they won't go away, but if you discipline your mind you'll be able to control them better.
 
I guess my question would be why you would want to eliminate your sexual desires. Because even when I was fat, unattractive, and had no prospects for having sex in the near future...I STILL loved feeling horny, and I STILL loved masturbation. I wasn't addicted to it or anything, but I thought it was a lot of fun. Is it not fun for you? Do you consider your sexual desires and masturbation to be a chore, or a waste, or a "reminder that you'll always be alone"?

Lex
 
Your libido will go down as you age, so nature will take its course. (Don't ask me how I know this.;)) But ...if you are looking for a way to stop your attraction (or desire) to guys, there is nothing to wash that away; even "chemical castration" does not make it go away.
 
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