Ever pick up a guy (or get picked up by one) in a straight bar?

[Hawkman]

I really do mean a straight bar -- not a mixed one.

It's a lot trickier than picking up another male in a gay bar-- for obvious reasons. The signals can be confusing for both you and the other guy. When he puts his hand on my arm is he just being friendly? Is our heart-to-heart conversation just a male-bonding thing? Did he buy me that drink because we both like the Giants, or was it something else? When he complained about his home life, was it just a typical husband's gripe?

The list could go on.

In my own experience, I've sometimes thought a married or otherwise apparently str8 dude was making a move on me in a str8 bar, but I've seldom been sure enough to act. I think I've missed out on some good opportunities.

Can any of you guys provide some wisdom here?

 

[jonty71]

i'm prob bisexual, but never been with a guy, only women. Anyway to reply to your comment, with mates, who I am not sexually attracted to i do go in for the male bonding thing and am not shy to touch a mate on the arm, or hug him or put my arm around him. I am in no way saying anything other than we are mates. So therefore I wouldn't read too much into it.

 

[RRRalph]

I don't go to gaybars. I've met gay or bisexual guys in straight bars. Most of the time i pick them out of the straight crowd. There are times when i was wrong: i start talking, but he doesn't flirt back. One time i just ask flat out if a guy was into guys as well. He laughed and he said i should fix my gaydar, cuz it seem to be broken. We had a laugh and drunk a couple of more beers. That was quite a cool response!

 

[Danugh]

Most hot DL gay men dont go to gay clubs, they go to straight clubs/bars, not necessarily to meet guys but yes it is possible and yes i have. Infact i prefer to meet guys at straight venues.

The only problem is that girls are there and they sometimes try to dance with you, but if you can bare the horror, you could walk away with that hot guys number.

 

[BIMICHAEL4FUN]

As a bi-guy, I go to both gay and str8 bars...however, I have had success picking up men at str8 bars. My highest "success rate" would be at hotel bars. It's amazing how horny str8 business travelers are when they are away from home!!

 

[Joe King Jay]

Anyway to reply to your comment, with mates, who I am not sexually attracted to i do go in for the male bonding thing and am not shy to touch a mate on the arm, or hug him or put my arm around him. I am in no way saying anything other than we are mates. So therefore I wouldn't read too much into it.

I agree. I buy people drinks just to be friendly too. Unless the person does something that really gives of a strong vibe, I would play it safe or do what RRRalph did.

One time i just ask flat out if a guy was into guys as well

 

[digitaldude5]

Well, here's my story.

I went out with a group of friends one night, and got totally hammered. I mean kick-me-in-the-crotch-I'll-laugh-about-it hammered. So anyways, this guy starts hanging out with us, a friend of some of the friends in my group. We kinda did the whole "looking but looking away when we catch eachother" kinda thing. I continued to drink, liquid courage and all that jazz...

ANYWAYS, we eventually end up at a second bar, by which time I had transitioned to beer and was nursing another one, when I puked... on the table. I went to the bathroom, puked a shitload more, to which one of my GIRLS came in to see if I was ok. I got puke on my favorite shirt, my silk tie (cried a bit when I discovered it) and my jeans. So the girls decided to leave because they were tired (they still maintain it, though I know I ruined the evening), but I decided to stay and sober up a bit, and the guy decided to stay with me. We walked around a bit, at which point I just put an arm on the back of his neck, pulled him close, and drunkenly asked if he wanted to go back to my place and have some fun. He agreed, and we went and humped for awhile, passed out, and he left the next morning.

We've started talking again recently, and he may be with the rest of the nurses when I go out tomorrow night. So we'll see where things go... I've decided to let him come to me though... I'm not going to pick him up again if he's gonna leave the next morning and never come for his jacket.

And that's my story/rant/procrastination... I have a paper to get back to.

 

[wanderer]

I don't go to gaybars. I've met gay or bisexual guys in straight bars. Most of the time i pick them out of the straight crowd. There are times when i was wrong: i start talking, but he doesn't flirt back. One time i just ask flat out if a guy was into guys as well. He laughed and he said i should fix my gaydar, cuz it seem to be broken. We had a laugh and drunk a couple of more beers. That was quite a cool response!

that guy was such a good sport about it, i wish i read more responses like this. he sounds pretty cool.

 

[pisces69]

Only once. It was at a foam party they had at a club where I used to live. I saw they guy dancing on this little stage and couldn't stop staring at him, he noticed and later came over and we started to chat. We went into the foam where no one could see us and he kissed me, we later went back to my place and had great sex. I took him home but never saw him again. He did say he was bi though, so probably had a girlfriend or something and just wanted some naughty quick fun.

 

[SilverRRCloud]

I do, only if I have no better choice.

My time and energy are both usually at a premium. So, if I need to hunt a dude down, off I go to the best bar/club in town and that's where these things happen.

At times, this is not quite an option and I'll just have a drink at the hotel bar b4 hittin' the sack.

Yup, now and then, you do pick up a distinct vibe of 'a str8 acting dude' looking for some anonymous fun.

I usually pass on those 'experimenting, str8, curious and other dudes' and just move on... Hardly worth the trouble... But, yeah, there have been a few noted exceptions over the years, too.

SC

 

[cellular]

As a gay guy, i have trouble even going to a straight bar, or any events that is a boy girl thing. I feel so uncomfortable about it to the point of awkwardness. I dont know what to do in those situations, im not going to hook up with chicks, and the only guys there are straight, and the guys are looking for the girls, so i stick out like a sore thumb.

 

[lewmagnet]

That's where the fun kicks in.

 

[cityboyofd]

They often don't need too be Drunk Sometimes they just need a little nudge in the right direction and often times prefer the more masculine Gay guy over the more feminine.Just my experience ; P

 

[greekdude]

I'm always getting hit on by guys or girls in straight bars. On two occassions guy/girl couples tried to pick me up and take me home. I went for it the first time, they were both hot, but it ended up being too weird, the guy was more interested in me than the girl was, in the end she ended up watching me and her boyfriend have sex. Seems if I want to hook up, all I have to do is go to a bar, straight or gay. Too bad I don't drink. LOL

 

[RRRalph]

One time i just ask flat out if a guy was into guys as well. He laughed and he said i should fix my gaydar, cuz it seem to be broken. We had a laugh and drunk a couple of more beers. That was quite a cool response!

that guy was such a good sport about it, i wish i read more responses like this. he sounds pretty cool.

Yes, he's very cool. From time to time i still meet him in a bar. We have a beer and a chat then.

 

[lightkeeper483]

i have done this a few times, but it pisses me off when they leave in the middle of the night and then act lie they dont know yo when they see you again. especially if they give you head and swallow, but insist that they arent gay, cum on, if a guy is not gay he is not going to suck your penis and eat your cum.

 

[sonny10305]

I met up with a str8 dude I had had a few drinks with on another night and since we had gotten to know each other a little our second conversation was more friendly. At one point I remembered something that happened to me and my soon-to-be brother in law a few years earlier and decided to try it again.
At one point, while joking around, I said something to cause him to jokingly say "fuck you" to which I replied, "that could be arranged". A few minutes later he deliberately and conveniently said it again, and so I repeated myself. He then said "that's the second time you said that" and I said cause, I meant it.
We ended up in his car and I would like to think I got his man-on-man virginity.

 

[lostparker17]

when i was in my 20s in the early '70s, i didn't even know gay bars existed and i certainly hadnt come out to myself let alone to others. i picked up many guys in str8 bars for mutual jo or bj's. yes it was awkward when it was over, but it was always hot.

 

[Hairydood69]

Not only was this a surprise to me but it is also pretty funny.

Went to the same bar a lot with a freind from work. He knew the bartender and we allways did lots of free shots.

One night close to clse he decides to leave and I decide to chill there for awhile. in came some hairy stocky dude wearing a wife beater and those silky 70's shorts, the kind that are yellow and had the black trim down the sides ...
I instantly got a vibe. He was distressed, something about a fight with his girlfriend. I just enjoyed the show of his shorts riding up..his hairy legs..his chest and smooth shoulders. The interesting part was that the "vibe" i got was the same one I Allways get when i think another guy "might be"...yet I never act on it.
Low an behold who asks me to go to an after hours bar and maybe score some "drugs". ( for him....my freind that i was there with earkier was into drugs alos. i wasnt but was aware).
Following the "vibe" I figured why not. So now I am driving around town with the guy who is directing me to the more seedy parts of town looking to "score' some drugs. no the way down we ge tto talking...
Some how i got the nerve to start talking baout sex....and sex with men. He mentions he has thought about it...subject change and then i bring it up again. He asks if i was gay. I think i said no..but asked if it mattered.
We find the place... a crack house...he goes in to make a purchase and meanwhile sends out a whore to blow me. ( cuz i guess i mustah needed it....what a samaritan).

So...he retunrs to my car...i know he is high now and the whore was pretty lame so i didnt get off...
BLah blah blah...we start talking about blow jobs again..he asks how i can still be horny since he sent me out a whore. Im laughing in my head.
I push the blow job idea and before you know it.. "all right..i'll blow ya" And he does..and its damn good...and he tells me that he never gets hard ..even for his girlfriend...so my attempts are pointless.
So I start playing with his ass while he blows me..once I finnish..Mr "are u gay- heres a hooker-whiny little bitch that he was" asks if I live near by...because he would like to me to fuck him and that we could meet at a local hotel. Not to mentiuon that he shares how he and his freind hook up all the time. Since he was such a bitch about it all night long when he asked for my number I simply dropped him off and said no thanks. Moral of that story...? Follow the vibe dammit!

A few years later I was at a bar with some freinds from work..we got all buzzed and were hittin on thses women..( female fire fighters) Freinds were leaving....girls wanted me to go to another bar. I was to follow them once i finnished my drink...as I was paying the bill this guy comes up to me and tells me I looked like i was haiving fun all night and seemed cool. I tell him thanks and he tells me he is going through a divorce and just wanted to say how much fiun he was having watching me with my freinds.
ok.....there was that vibe again.....
So instead of meeting the ladies.. i drove around all night with htis dude while he struggled to make a move. He told me he sucked before..he told he usually hooks up with his freind whose wife is freinds with his wife..they double a lot.
he said he had issues with me not being married.....
finally, after fighting with the notion of telling him that I understood why his wife wanted to divorce him...I asked to be dropped off..he did...

 

[Andyk4365]

I met up with a str8 dude I had had a few drinks with on another night and since we had gotten to know each other a little our second conversation was more friendly. At one point I remembered something that happened to me and my soon-to-be brother in law a few years earlier and decided to try it again.
At one point, while joking around, I said something to cause him to jokingly say "fuck you" to which I replied, "that could be arranged". A few minutes later he deliberately and conveniently said it again, and so I repeated myself. He then said "that's the second time you said that" and I said cause, I meant it.
We ended up in his car and I would like to think I got his man-on-man virginity.

you and your brother in law fucked?