"Everybody believes I'm straight"

[Lube]

If you're one of those delusional guys who is hiding in the closet and thinks everybody believes what you tell them and never questions what you tell them, and you always believe guys if they claim they're straight... Well, have I got news for you.

http://jezebel.com/5652114/college-girls-power-point-fuck-list-goes-viral-gallery

The article has nothing at all to do with being gay, but it does show the lengths to which people analyze the friends, fuck buddies, and acquaintances around them.

This woman completely ignores mens self pronouncements about virility and perceptions others have about them and shares with her 3 closest friends (and, now, the world) her experiences and perceptions of men she's had sex with.

Again, nothing about being gay, but lots of analysis of people--analysis that she's willing and able to share with friends.

So if you think people aren't questioning/gossiping about your sexuality behind your back, you are mistaken.

I am not putting this out here to depress you or make you suicidal. On the contrary, it is simply a reality check that PEOPLE DO NOT BELIEVE THE LIES WE TELL THEM.

So get your head out of the sand, move on with your life, and come out of the closet. Because people are already talking about you--and sharing it with others.

(some may say this is completely obvious and pointless, but there are many JUBbers who totally believe someone if they claim they are straight, and expect others to do the same for them. I'm just saying life ain't that simple).

 

[G-Lexington]

>>>there are many JUBbers who totally believe someone if they claim they are straight...

Like me. But with me, it's less a case of "well, he says he's straight, so he must be." It's more the case of "well, even if he IS gay, he's not ready to admit it yet, so best just leave that alone."

But that's me. Others find it better to press the issue, and drag people out of the closet.

Lex

 

[Corny]

people need to be ready to come out - pressing the issues never helped anyone.

apart from that .. people believe a whole fucking lot of lies. also a people not believing a lie would imply that the lie has been told. but not only many people believe a lot of lies, even more people just assume things without ever thinking about them.

 

[Greenherbz]

i really think it's a case-by-case basis.
I honestly believe that all of my straight friends believe I'm straight. No one has ever made side comments while they're drunk or anything. And i know some of my friends wouldn't treat me the same if they thought I was gay.

It depends on the person IMO, we've all seen that flaming "straight" guy who claims he's straight and everyone knows he's gay, but we've all also heard of those guys who come out after high school and everyone is like "WTF??? they were gay??"

 

[CumAlong]

There are some gay people who DO act straight and people don't have much reason to think they are gay... Then again, there are a lot of closet gay men who talk fabulously all the time, shop till they drop and gossip like girls in a salon, and seem to think no one knows...

The point is, not everyone in the closet has a sign on the outside they dont know about telling everyone they are gay.

My roommate I have lived with for 3 years now has been told by 5 different people I'm gay, one of which was a gay man who wants to get with me! And he still to this day insists to everyone and his best friends (who happens to be my best friend also...) that there is no way i could be gay because a) he would know already and b) i dont show it, i'm just "metro".

I love being the gay best friend to so many girls, because I hear EVERYTHING. Also, i've begged and pleaded with the friends i came out to, asking if they knew before hand, and all insisted they thought i was straight. And no, they aren't lying.

 

[G-Lexington]

>>>The point is, not everyone in the closet has a sign on the outside they dont know about telling everyone they are gay.

They do for those who take any pains at all to see if it's there. If your friends aren't lying, they're utterly oblivious.

Lex

 

[CumAlong]

ok, can i ask you why they should of thought differently? They see me with a girl all the time, even see me hook up with chicks. I'm currently seeing a girl, almost to the point of dating. They are never with me when i go to gay clubs so they don't see that side of me. I don't have a fabulous voice, strut my walk, gossip like a school girl, make fashion comments on everything.

The only "gay" thing someone could see about me is that I dress nicely, which is hardly a gay crime because plenty of straight guys dress nicely. And i don't even dress as fabulous as most gay guys.

 

[tipmyscales86]

Some people are very impressionable, and will believe you if you make it appear like you are straight. It was actually pretty ironic that I had to convince a few of my friends that I was gay, after years of convincing them I was straight. There were a few people that were completely baffled after I came out. But I must say, it was a lot more fun and comfortable convincing them I was gay than it was being fake about liking girls in the past.

 

[hylas]

havent you already made this thread not too long ago?. i mean, exactly this thread?

 

[Corny]

^ you are right .. almost the same:

http://www.justusboys.com/forum/showthread.php?t=317314

guess somebody is on a crusade

 

[js334433]

What about those who are out to themselves and not necessarily to the world? Isn't that what truly matters?

 

[Echoes]

coming out takes some doing and not everybody is ready for going through a tough time due to different issues: family, friends, work, own conceptions, religion, etc. I think is much healthier to be out for either yourself and the ones round you, though I respect the ones who rather stay in the closet for whatever reason they may have.
I don't feel in position to judge anyone and it's non of my business to do that either.

 

[BlondeCanadian]

points were deducted for being canadian.. what abitch

 

[BlondeCanadian]

she was pretty vague on details.. also... the guys looked hot though

 

[Críostóir]

>>>The point is, not everyone in the closet has a sign on the outside they dont know about telling everyone they are gay.

They do for those who take any pains at all to see if it's there. If your friends aren't lying, they're utterly oblivious.

Lex

I'm with you. If they say they're straight, either they are, in which case I should leave them alone, or they're in the closet, in which case I should leave them alone.

Taking them at their word is therefore an optimal strategy.

 

[Críostóir]

points were deducted for being canadian.. what abitch

It's a plus to me! But then, I'm beginning to think I wanna be Canadian, please.

 

[altlover85]

So get your head out of the sand, move on with your life, and come out of the closet. Because people are already talking about you--and sharing it with others.

(some may say this is completely obvious and pointless, but there are many JUBbers who totally believe someone if they claim they are straight, and expect others to do the same for them. I'm just saying life ain't that simple).

So when you came out, everyone was like "We already knew, you big queen?" I'm obviously exaggerating on that, but I think you get my point. I think you think people care more about what other people are up to than they actually do.

i really think it's a case-by-case basis.
I honestly believe that all of my straight friends believe I'm straight. No one has ever made side comments while they're drunk or anything. And i know some of my friends wouldn't treat me the same if they thought I was gay.

It depends on the person IMO, we've all seen that flaming "straight" guy who claims he's straight and everyone knows he's gay, but we've all also heard of those guys who come out after high school and everyone is like "WTF??? they were gay??"

Do you feel your friends would react positively or negatively?

If I thought my friends would treat me differently (in a negative sense) for being gay, I would get used to the idea that when I come out, I should find real friends who accept me for who I am.

ok, can i ask you why they should of thought differently? They see me with a girl all the time, even see me hook up with chicks. I'm currently seeing a girl, almost to the point of dating. They are never with me when i go to gay clubs so they don't see that side of me. I don't have a fabulous voice, strut my walk, gossip like a school girl, make fashion comments on everything.

The only "gay" thing someone could see about me is that I dress nicely, which is hardly a gay crime because plenty of straight guys dress nicely. And i don't even dress as fabulous as most gay guys.

People don't think you are gay because you are bisexual, not gay.

What about those who are out to themselves and not necessarily to the world? Isn't that what truly matters?

I would argue it's a good first step, but not the only thing that matters. In order to have a fully integrated life you need to be out to your family and friends and not deny being gay if someone asks you or try to hide the fact.

 

[CumAlong]

People don't think you are gay because you are bisexual, not gay.

Probably very true, but that doesn't mean a gay guy can't have the same characteristics as me does it? Maybe rarer, but not impossible.

 

[Críostóir]

Probably very true, but that doesn't mean a gay guy can't have the same characteristics as me does it? Maybe rarer, but not impossible.

One reason some gay guys (not me) resent bi guys is because they can "cloak" at will. Straight people are incredibly clueless, in general, and if they've ever seen you with a girl will assume you're straight. Bi isn't even on their radar at all.

Not all of them. But enough.

 

[altlover85]

There are some gay people who DO act straight and people don't have much reason to think they are gay... Then again, there are a lot of closet gay men who talk fabulously all the time, shop till they drop and gossip like girls in a salon, and seem to think no one knows...

The point is, not everyone in the closet has a sign on the outside they dont know about telling everyone they are gay.

My roommate I have lived with for 3 years now has been told by 5 different people I'm gay, one of which was a gay man who wants to get with me! And he still to this day insists to everyone and his best friends (who happens to be my best friend also...) that there is no way i could be gay because a) he would know already and b) i dont show it, i'm just "metro".

I love being the gay best friend to so many girls, because I hear EVERYTHING. Also, i've begged and pleaded with the friends i came out to, asking if they knew before hand, and all insisted they thought i was straight. And no, they aren't lying.

A lot of this post is disingenuous because you neglect to tell us the things you tell us in the second post.

ok, can i ask you why they should of thought differently? They see me with a girl all the time, even see me hook up with chicks. I'm currently seeing a girl, almost to the point of dating. They are never with me when i go to gay clubs so they don't see that side of me. I don't have a fabulous voice, strut my walk, gossip like a school girl, make fashion comments on everything.

The only "gay" thing someone could see about me is that I dress nicely, which is hardly a gay crime because plenty of straight guys dress nicely. And i don't even dress as fabulous as most gay guys.

So basically you act closeted and don't show your gay side, but it's not because you are closeted, but because you are actually bisexual. When you interact with women it's likely that you show a level of authenticity that a closeted guy would not because you are ACTUALLY attracted to women. It's likely that a gay man would not show the same level of comfort.

Probably very true, but that doesn't mean a gay guy can't have the same characteristics as me does it? Maybe rarer, but not impossible.

No, I don't think it's impossible, but it's very rare and still not a valid comparison because you are attracted to women.