Everybody from England, Canada, Australia, & the Netherlands is a bunch of assholes

[trawler69]

Re: Everybody from England, Canada, Australia, & the Netherlands is a bunch of asshol

I have no problems with Americans as such, they are humans like the rest of us. They have their fair share of assholes as do we. I have problems with the bloke they voted in to represent them, and, because of the economic power of the US, the rest of us to a certain extent. The UK would never have into Iraqu if it weren't for the pressure from the US.

Unfortunately as this evangelical messenger is the face that is portrayed by the media as the voice of America, some conclude that the rest must be like him to have voted him in, forgeting that he had to use lawyers in getting his first term.

It also doesn't help that he can't string an intelligent sentence together without putting his foot in it.

It is plain from these boards that not all US citizens are crazy about him either and I respect them for that.

I also now realise that slobone was being ironic hence this posting.

 

[sparky95]

Re: Everybody from England, Canada, Australia, & the Netherlands is a bunch of asshol

Slobone is correct. But I'm too much of an arsehole to really care.....

 

[james1200]

Re: Everybody from England, Canada, Australia, & the Netherlands is a bunch of asshol

i hope for their sake you don't run into any americans....cheerio.

 

[wit_afrika]

Re: Everybody from England, Canada, Australia, & the Netherlands is a bunch of asshol

This is a cool thread, thanks slobone.

For once, perhaps I should feel happy in my home at the tip of dark Africa

Below is something I came across on the net. They are apparently questions posted on a South African Tourism Website by people from various parts of the world and were answered by the website owner. Unfortunately I do not have reference to the original website.

Q: Does it ever get windy in South Africa? I have never seen it raining on TV, so how do the plants grow? (UK)

A: We import all plants fully grown and then just sit around watching them die.


Q: Will I be able to see elephants in the street? (USA)

A: Depends how much you've been drinking.


Q: I want to walk from Durban to Cape Town - can I follow the railroad tracks? (Sweden)

A: Sure, it's only two thousand kilometers, take lots of water...


Q: Is it safe to run around in the bushes in South Africa? (Sweden)

A: So it's true what they say about Swedes...?


Q: Are there any ATMs (cash machines) in South Africa? Can you send me a list of them in JHB, Cape Town, Knysna and Jeffrey's Bay? (UK)

A: ....and what did your last slave die of?


Q: Can you give me some information about Koala Bear racing in South Africa? (USA)

A: Aus-tra-lia is that big island in the middle of the Pacific.

A-fri-ca is the big triangle shaped continent south of Europe which does not... oh forget it.

Sure, the Koala Bear racing is every Tuesday night in Hillbrow. Come naked.


Q: Which direction is north in South Africa? (USA)

A: Face south and then turn 90 degrees. Contact us when you get here and we'll send the rest of the directions.


Q: Can I bring cutlery into South Africa? (UK)

A: Why? Just use your fingers like we do.


Q: Can you send me the Vienna Boys' Choir schedule? (USA)

A: Aus-tri-a is that quaint little country bordering Ger-man-y, which is... oh forget it. Sure, the Vienna Boys Choir plays every Tuesday night in Hillbrow, straight after the Koala Bear races. Come naked.


Q: Do you have perfume in South Africa? (France)

A: No, WE don't stink.


Q: I have developed a new product that is the fountain of youth. Can you tell me where I can sell it in South Africa? (USA)

A: Anywhere significant numbers of Americans gather.


Q: Can you tell me the regions in South Africa where the female population is smaller than the male population? (Italy)

A: Yes. Gay nightclubs.


Q: Do you celebrate Christmas in South Africa? (France)

A: Only at Christmas


Q: Are there killer bees in South Africa? (Germany)

A: Not yet, but for you, we'll import them.


Q: Are there supermarkets in Cape Town and is milk available all year round? (Germany)

A: No, we are a peaceful civilization of vegan hunter-gatherers. Milk is illegal.


Q: Please send a list of all doctors in South Africa who can dispense rattlesnake serum. (USA)

A: Rattlesnakes live in A-me-ri-ca, which is where YOU come from. All South African snakes are perfectly harmless, can be safely handled and make good pets.


Q: I was in South Africa in 1969, and I want to contact the girl I dated while I was staying in Hillbrow. Can you help? (USA)

A: Yes, and you will still have to pay her by the hour.


Q: Will I be able to speek English most places I go? (USA)

A: Yes, but you'll have to learn it first.

 

[Finn]

Re: Everybody from England, Canada, Australia, & the Netherlands is a bunch of asshol

Funny as hell!

 

[Finn]

Re: Everybody from England, Canada, Australia, & the Netherlands is a bunch of asshol

Sorry to say, this is the most inane thread I've ever seen.

 

[BenF]

Re: Everybody from England, Canada, Australia, & the Netherlands is a bunch of asshol

He SAId England. Same thing.

That is a common misconception made by all truly stupid people. God bless you.



The World according to America...

and finally, how Americans see the world....

 

[kallipolis]

Re: Everybody from England, Canada, Australia, & the Netherlands is a bunch of asshol

Ben,

Mouth fulls are not a monopoly of your American cousins

 

[_AJ_]

Re: Everybody from England, Canada, Australia, & the Netherlands is a bunch of asshol

a recent areticle from the age

Love, hate or confusion?

David Goodman and Kate Darian-Smith
November 19, 2006

LAST year, a survey by the Lowy Institute concluded that the majority of Australians harboured negative attitudes towards America. John Howard and Peter Costello have since drawn upon this finding to scold Australians for such un-Australian thoughts, while Rupert Murdoch's concerns about anti-Americanism in Australia have predictably hit the headlines this week. But such responses from our political leaders are as simplistic as the question posed in the original survey. Expressions of anti-American or pro-American sentiment are certainly not new in Australian society. But, as with all complex relationships, it's a matter of degree.

The relationship between Australians and Americans dates back to the African-American convicts in the First Fleet when it landed in 1788. Miners from California's goldfields flocked to the goldfields of NSW and Victoria, where they shared their ideas about democracy and liberty and their business skills.

The US offered to the Australian colonies a model of how a modern immigrant society, away from Old Europe, could thrive. It was the model of a republican society, admired by colonial radicals in the antipodes. And, as historian Marilyn Lake has argued, post-Civil War America also provided Australia's federation fathers with lessons about the impossibility of sustaining multiracial democracies. The White Australia Policy emerged as much from white supremacist stories about race relations in the US as from the ideologies of British imperialism.

Australian attitudes to the US have been historically shaped by the influence of British culture and the rise of Australian nationalism. In the 1920s and 1930s, fears about the Americanisation of Australian society were often provoked for left-wing intellectuals by fears about the spread of Hollywood movies and trashy popular culture. When prime minister John Curtin looked to America for military assistance during World War II, this marked a shift in Australia's foreign policy ties with the US in the Asia-Pacific region. The subsequent decisions of Australian governments to participate in wars in Vietnam and Iraq have flowed from that closer relationship.

Australians tend to react to the US in patterned ways. Certain things about American society leap out at Australians because of the grid of their own culture. For example, here is a quick and blunt summary of what Australian university students most often say about the US when it is discussed in class: "Americans talk more fluently than us, and are more self-confident. They are more patriotic, and likely to be more religious. They do not have to vote in their elections, and many of them do not bother to vote at all. They lack a feel for irony and lack humour. They think they have the greatest democracy in the world, yet their own democracy has identifiable flaws, notable among them the treatment of the African-American population through much of its history. Their politics seems strangely organised because the labour/capital, employee/employer divide is not the main axis of political division. The class divide in American politics is always overlaid with racial and ethnic divisions of baffling complexity. Their media-suffused society is all surface and glittering image."

In each of these common stereotypes there is an implicit wish that the US was more like Australia, and an implied sense that Australia has a more authentic and meaningful culture.

The US is in very many ways not like Australia. The superficial similarities, and the decades-old complaints about the Americanisation of Australian society, mask a deeper set of differences. The histories of the two nations certainly display some profound similarities — both were former British colonies, settler societies built on indigenous land, immigrant societies, federal democracies. But the differences are as important — the enduring effects of slavery in the US, the earlier arrival of non-British immigrants, the religious origins of several of the settlements, the sustained employment of the military against the indigenous population. Many of the differences are differences of scale — the size and complexity and regional variations in American society is enormous.

We think we know all about the US because our lives are awash with American cultural products, and have been since the late 19th century. Australians continue to sing American songs, watch American TV and films. Our language continues rapidly to adopt those new words and phrases that the fertile genius of American English so readily provides. Just in the past decade "power outages" has taken a place in our language. This easy flow gives us a certain confidence in pronouncing on the US, but obscures the real differences and the difficulties of translation. Reflecting on US culture can also highlight, with some disquiet, elements we may find objectionable about our own.

And while there's been much public discussion about anti-Americanism in Australia, perhaps it's worth putting this in perspective. Surely, what appear to be disturbing signs of rising intolerance towards Islamic communities in Australia have more potential to be damaging to the fabric of our own society. Again, it's all a matter of degree.

Dr David Goodman is co-ordinator of American studies and Professor Kate Darian-Smith is at the Australian Centre, at Melbourne University.
http://www.theage.com.au/news/opinion/love-hate-or-confusion/2006/11/18/1163266832738.html

 

[GL]

Re: Everybody from England, Canada, Australia, & the Netherlands is a bunch of asshol

I have no problems with Americans as such, they are humans like the rest of us. They have their fair share of assholes as do we. I have problems with the bloke they voted in to represent them, and, because of the economic power of the US, the rest of us to a certain extent. The UK would never have into Iraqu if it weren't for the pressure from the US.

Unfortunately as this evangelical messenger is the face that is portrayed by the media as the voice of America, some conclude that the rest must be like him to have voted him in, forgeting that he had to use lawyers in getting his first term.

It also doesn't help that he can't string an intelligent sentence together without putting his foot in it.

It is plain from these boards that not all US citizens are crazy about him either and I respect them for that.

I also now realise that slobone was being ironic hence this posting.

He may be the elected leader of this nation, but he only represented little more than 50% of the electorate and I certainly didn't vote for the dork. Not that it mattered no thanks to Florida. And I would venture to guess that if this past November was a Presidential election, we would have seen his and his party's ass kicked to the curb. Oh well... in two years time.

But I can see how the world would look on us in poor favor as a result of his attitude, poor decisions and botched policies. Just remember when you slam us Americans on these happy boards, you're really attacking the wrong Americans. With the exception of a few members, it's a pretty safe bet that the ones here never did cast a vote for W.

 

[Elwood]

Re: Everybody from England, Canada, Australia, & the Netherlands is a bunch of asshol

What a great thread to drink my Sunday morning coffee too. You should all pack you things and move to CANADA the greatest country in the world!! (Let the Canada bashing begin LOL)

 

[unclaimedblessing]

Re: Everybody from England, Canada, Australia, & the Netherlands is a bunch of asshol

Well Slobone. what a fine mess you've gotten us into this time.
Your topic has certainly brought out a certain asshole element in some of our members worldwide.
All the countries you mentioned were all part of destroying Nazism & Communism.
All contributed their young mens bloods in both the Atlantic and Pacific Theaters of WWII.
Now, like spoiled siblings or a wild dog pack, we'e tearing at each other.
Maybe Anne Frank got it all wrong.

 

[Nonimus]

Re: Everybody from England, Canada, Australia, & the Netherlands is a bunch of asshol

Ermmm..... YES. That's it...American thru and thru.....

You oh us for keeping the world safe. I'm an American and make no mistake, if we say Wales is in England then you had better get used to growing your shamrocks at Buckingham Palace because without us you would all have been speaking German by now. Or worse, Dutch.

And I'm certainly not just stirring the pot from my evil lair in, oh, say...Canada. ;-) so get that idea out of your heads faster than a French retreat.

1) Shamrocks are an Irish National Symbol - (perhaps you meant Daffodills)

2) Wales is not in England, the Welsh existed long before the Anglo Saxons even arrived in Britain

3) Wales has its own language and it happens to be the oldest living language in Europe

4) You are ignorant and lack deeply needed intelligence/knowledge of the subject before entering such 'adult' conversations otherwise you'll end up looking the dumb witted fool that you've shown yourself to be.

 

[hunky]

Re: Everybody from England, Canada, Australia, & the Netherlands is a bunch of asshol

Thanks for getting my country out of this!

 

[Aaron]

Re: Everybody from England, Canada, Australia, & the Netherlands is a bunch of asshol

post removed

 

[Lostlover]

Re: Everybody from England, Canada, Australia, & the Netherlands is a bunch of asshol

a recent areticle from the age

Love, hate or confusion?

David Goodman and Kate Darian-Smith
November 19, 2006

LAST year, a survey by the Lowy Institute concluded that the majority of Australians harboured negative attitudes towards America. John Howard and Peter Costello have since drawn upon this finding to scold Australians for such un-Australian thoughts, while Rupert Murdoch's concerns about anti-Americanism in Australia have predictably hit the headlines this week. But such responses from our political leaders are as simplistic as the question posed in the original survey. Expressions of anti-American or pro-American sentiment are certainly not new in Australian society. But, as with all complex relationships, it's a matter of degree.

Good article CTM. Like I was saying last night before I hurt an Aussie poster's feelings, Americans and Australians have no real hostility towards one another.

 

[FREDDIE187]

Re: Everybody from England, Canada, Australia, & the Netherlands is a bunch of asshol

Well, I am happy that I am a South African and not included.

James, I thought Elton John is the queen of England. Who is this Prince Charles you are talking about.

 

[james1200]

Re: Everybody from England, Canada, Australia, & the Netherlands is a bunch of asshol

Well, I am happy that I am a South African and not included.

James, I thought Elton John is the queen of England. Who is this Prince Charles you are talking about.

i'm beginning to think jolelifesyork is the true queen of england...and of course nonimus the king. noni, keep your woman in line.

 

[james1200]

Re: Everybody from England, Canada, Australia, & the Netherlands is a bunch of asshol

What a great thread to drink my Sunday morning coffee too. You should all pack you things and move to CANADA the greatest country in the world!! (Let the Canada bashing begin LOL)

canada you say...here we refer to canada as the 51st state, that country up north filled with people who speak funny, that country with those nasty, smelly french types or that place up north where we store our nuclear waste. wait...i probably shouldn't have said anything about that last one.

but don't worry canucks...we'll be coming soon to "liberate" you from all that boredom. stay inside til the bombs stop falling.

 

[trawler69]

Re: Everybody from England, Canada, Australia, & the Netherlands is a bunch of asshol

No problem with the German Language. There is a great friendship between us Americans and Germanians (now anyway) because it gives the Germanians a good place to sell their everyday cars as luxury vehicles with a 50% markup.

Umm they are called Germans. I thought with your great knowlege of European history and the part America played in it you might have known this