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Eww, he looks 14! You're a perv! But...But...

C

califguy

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You are right about your feelings. Sometimes there is a double standard. It just didn't occur to them what they had done. Remember that guys (straight and gay) sometimes think with their heads and dicks, and they are 2 different things. I'm glad you'll explain it to your friends at an appropriate time.
 
That was nice of you to not say anything in the restaurant.

I would have told them right then and there. I would try to be loud about it. I don't know what kind of restaurant you were in but in my weekly trips with my friends going to Red Robin, we talk about anything. And I mean anything. No one has ever complained.
 
You should be able to express feelings for ever you want too. Double standards aren't something that should be used with friends. Even if the guy was 14 in all actually....which he wasnt in this case....there is no harm in saying that he is good looking, so long as you dont act on it. Thats just the way some guys are. But you right in that you should point out that their behavior was inapporite and should be condemed.
 
I love people that are quick to point out what they think your doing wrong, when they are doing worse. I know it's hard, but don't pay them any mind. As said before, there is a double standard. I guarantee that if you had said that a 40 year old man was attractive, they would have went "ewww!" The best thing to do is to be aware of how they are and don't say anything around them. I have to admire your strength for having to listen to them talk about pussy.
 
You were in an obviously 'no-win' situation with your friends. I would probably seek out he who might seem the most sensible of your group and explain the group's "illogic". That may not stop their behavior...but you will have made a point!
 
Guys love the talk. When it comes to walking the walk, everything changes.

In this case, that was good for everybody.

Kids are off limits. That much is clear to all dudes. I cannot think of many frat dudes looking forward to spending some quality time in jail, labelled as child molesters.

So, yeah, write off as the usual adolescent 'shootin' the breeze phenomenon.

SC
 
Oh my God! This is actually a good thread. My beef is with straight guys whose double standards don't seem to phase them one bit. It's as if what they have to say about sexuality or morals is the last word with them or anyone else for that matter. And my main pet peeve is straight guys who think that lesbians are THE hottest thing!!! Or 2 women fucking each other period!!! I've been in situations where things were said that really pissed me off . Especially when it comes to guys liking other guys!!!But I too kept my cool until a later time when I told them about how I felt.
 
thelaw2047 said:
Oh my God! This is actually a good thread. My beef is with straight guys whose double standards don't seem to phase them one bit. It's as if what they have to say about sexuality or morals is the last word with them or anyone else for that matter. And my main pet peeve is straight guys who think that lesbians are THE hottest thing!!! Or 2 women fucking each other period!!! I've been in situations where things were said that really pissed me off . Especially when it comes to guys liking other guys!!!But I too kept my cool until a later time when I told them about how I felt.
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Well first off, some of my favorite Lesbians really get off watching Gay Porn. Two guys going at it really makes them "wet."

Second of all, I like to really mess with my straight guy friends by asking them one simple question:

"Do you know the difference between Gay Porn and Straight Porn?"

They look at me bewildered and say. "No. What's the difference?"

I answer, "In Gay Porn you can imagine yourself in EITHER position!" :badgrin:

That, and the chick usually doesn't "eat" the guys ass! :cool:

Come on! We can be Gay and CRASS! Unload! Let them know that they're not the end all be all when it comes to being a horn dawg! ..|
 
I've been in the situation many times. My friends always act like that. Although its just joking around and I'm sure that they dont really mean anything derogatory about it.
 
Well, remember what kind of guys you said you were hanging out with. Now if these were your close, sensible, friends, then you'd have something to be really offended about. It was nice of you not to say anything then, but I'd let 'em have it soon enough.
 
Great story. How'd you hold it together enough to make all of your points? I couldn't have done as well.

And your list of points is right on the money. Especially this:
My desires as a gay guy are no different than theirs except for the fact that it's a guy I like. I think about sex a lot. I am horny all the time.
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All things are equal. Those guys are the same as us and try just as hard to get their needs met.

But your best line, maybe the best I've ever heard on JUB, is the one about the 14 year old girl having a brother. That is so beautiful!

Good job! :=D:
 
I too am glad it went well

thanks for sharing - some real thought provoking comments
 
mabye I'm not reading the post correctly.

They teased each other for liking young girls and did the same to you for liking young guys.

sounds to me like you're one of the crowd.
 
Well said. Reminds me of a quote (someone will probably flame me sometime):

"Men have only enough blood for one thing - either their brains or their dicks and NOT both at the same time. "


califguy said:
You are right about your feelings. Sometimes there is a double standard. It just didn't occur to them what they had done. Remember that guys (straight and gay) sometimes think with their heads and dicks, and they are 2 different things. I'm glad you'll explain it to your friends at an appropriate time.
Click to expand...
 
MattieMich said:
I just have to vent about this. Tonight I was out with a group of guys from school, all straight. We were at Buffalo Wild Wings and having a great time -- watched all the sports, played trivia, joked around and burned our mouthes with spicy wings. The guys ranged in age from 19-23. SEVERAL times during the night the guys made sexual comments about the girls around us, it's nothing I'm shocked or offended by, it's just guys being guys. Some of the girls these guys were talking about "doing" were really young, 15-17 but a few looked even younger. "If she's old enough to pee, she's old enough for me." They would tease the guy who found the young girl hot but then two minutes later they'd point out a young girl themselves. Then I sat there and listened to them talk about how hot virgins are or what they'd teach them. Yes, I was out with a group of total frat boy neanderthals. So one of the guys looked at me and asked who I thought was hot but I couldn't point to anybody at the table. So I looked around and pointed to several different guys (I'm out), all of whom looked 17 or over. Suddenly I became a perv who liked little boys. For their sake I was not going to get into a loud discussion about what hypocrites they are for liking girls WAY younger than the guys I was pointing to, but also for assuming anything about me based on a person I found attractive when I didn't assume for one second that any of these guys were serious about wanting to deflower 12 year olds. I'm going to wait until we are in a quiet environment and all together again and explain to them how stupid their assumptions were. But in the meantime I just wanted to vent.
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Well what did they say?
You yourself said they were making fun of each other. Mybe they were making fun of you too.
 
Well what did they say?
You yourself said they were making fun of each other. Mybe they were making fun of you too.
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I think the point he is making is that Gay men are perceived as Perverts. Period. It doesn't matter whether the straight guys are essentially doing the same thing. We start out already as perverts in their minds and so if we join in and act like straight guys, just with males instead of females, they judge as us even more perverted.

It seems clear from MattieMich's post that, while a fun guy himself, there was a double standard going on that night. And the next night. So I, for one, trust his perception here and prefer to give him the benefit of the doubt, not some straight guys.
 
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