Feeling Him Cum Inside

[openthedark]

Are you "supposed" (yes, overgeneralization, but I guess I'm asking about the majority- which, I'm aware, is another generalization) to be able to feel a guy cum in you? (That would be bareback, specifically.)

 

[NW007]

Normally I would say yes, and why is it you ask? Did you have experience where you didn't (This discussion assumes safe play is in order)

 

[openthedark]

Normally I would say yes, and why is it you ask? Did you have experience where you didn't (This discussion assumes safe play is in order)

Yes...every experience. I have never felt anything, I just know from reading his body language. (I don't play around with anyone else.)

 

[NW007]

Does he cum quickly inside of you, or how long after he is inside of you does he normally cum. I mean has he been fucking you long and hard before he cums, etc. How tight are you. As i think it is neat to be able to feel the guys pulsating cock inside of me when I bottom. Do you ever clamp down on his cock so you can fell it pulsating. Part of it might be if he is completely inside of you or not.

Perhaps next time you should have him tell you when he is about to cum so you can be attuned to it perhaps. Let him tell you what he is feeling as he cums inside of you. Is he a shooter or does it just ooze out which would make it harder to feel perhaps.

 

[openthedark]

He doesn't cum quickly, he can take a while before he finishes if he wants to. I think I am tight, because I'd never bottomed before I met him and have only done so a handful of times since. I have never felt him pulsating either; to be honest I don't like bottoming and sometimes just am thinking that I hope he cums fast so we can be done, heh. I can tell when he is about to cum from his breathing, expressions, and body positions, and I think I'm pretty aware and attuned to things so I am paying attention to see if I feel anything, but I just don't. That is a good point about him being a shooter or not though because the weird thing is, I don't know. He likes to cum inside and can't finish with a BJ or HJ, and he's never cum unless I let him do me. If I say no to that, we kind of just taper off...

 

[bounder]

how terribly unfortunate for him

 

[NW007]

I would say one shouldn't bottom just cause the other guy insists on it. I mean you should want it or enjoy it yourself to truly enjoy it. It goes without saying that you should make sure he takes time to prep your hole for it too. And use plenty of lube. to me nothing is more undesirable than a top who doesn't take the time to prep the bottom and doens't use enough lube. If one is bottoming correctly it shouldn't hurt.

I am versatile so I cum to this discussion from both sides.

 

[openthedark]

how terribly unfortunate for him

What is?

I would say one shouldn't bottom just cause the other guy insists on it. I mean you should want it or enjoy it yourself to truly enjoy it. It goes without saying that you should make sure he takes time to prep your hole for it too. And use plenty of lube. to me nothing is more undesirable than a top who doesn't take the time to prep the bottom and doens't use enough lube. If one is bottoming correctly it shouldn't hurt.

I am versatile so I cum to this discussion from both sides.

I know...it's just that I like him and if I didn't let him top I think it would be a sexless relationship and that can't really last. He does realize we have different preferences and suggested an open relationship, but that is another issue and another thread maybe.

It's not that it really hurts, I am more used to it now, I just don't like the idea or feeling of it so much. Sometimes it does feel good but I can definitely live without it. I might be more open to it if he let me do him too, but originally he said that he was a total top and wouldn't. I think he might be warming to the idea, if just to make me happy. Even so...I dunno...

 

[MarkDW]

Personally, I think it depends on the person. I, for one, don't feel it either. Many guys do, and say how they "love" it.

Some do, some don't?

 

[openthedark]

Nope. The intestinal walls simply do not have those receptors.

Now some may feel it as pressure against their prostate or whatever due to each unique body. But the sensation receptors are just not in that type of tissue.

Here's a pretty common reaction when asked of women:

Interesting, thanks. I figured I was supposed to be feeling some kind of warm or wet sensation.

I'd ditch the guy myself..
I couldn't be with a guy who believed in such rigid sex roles..
Sounds like he may have other issues..

Well there are many guys who (say they) strictly top. It's just unfortunate when you really like a person and your tastes don't match up. I'm not ready to stop seeing this guy over that just yet, though. I don't think I am anyway.

 

[bounder]

What is?

Unfortunate that he can't cum from getting sucked or jerked. Even more unfortunate that the only thing that gets him off is a burden for you.

How often does he push for anal?

 

[openthedark]

Unfortunate that he can't cum from getting sucked or jerked. Even more unfortunate that the only thing that gets him off is a burden for you.

How often does he push for anal?

Almost whenever we are 'together,' but push might be the wrong word. He tries to get it, sure, but if I say no, he is not really overbearing or forceful. I might have to say no a few times though.

Sounds to me like this guy is possibly insecure about his low volume semen production during ejaculation. If he's busting nuts in your ass, you should definately feel it.

Just a thought.

I don't think that's it. He precums a lot and anyway that sort of stuff does not bother him.

 

[dpnice]

In my opinion this doesn't seem to be a very healthy sexual relationship. There certainly doesn't seem to be any sharing involved.

May I ask if you are satisfied with the sex that you do experience with him. Is anal sex for him something he does and once over so is anything else including satisfying you?

I can understand you not wanting to give up on the guy but there comes a stage when one begins to feel used and it is then one starts to go looking elsewhere.

 

[Curiosities]

I can feel it, over all the pain and stuff.
It feels kind of like a squirt gun squirting in your ass, and if it shoots on the prostate, it feels like heaven for me.

After a few squirts, you can feel the cum flowing on the walls of your asshole, which turns me on.

 

[pigface]

It feels kind of like a squirt gun squirting in your ass,

Ah, well we all know what THAT feels like.

 

[Shepherd 2]

I would say one shouldn't bottom just cause the other guy insists on it. I mean you should want it or enjoy it yourself to truly enjoy it. It goes without saying that you should make sure he takes time to prep your hole for it too. And use plenty of lube. to me nothing is more undesirable than a top who doesn't take the time to prep the bottom and doens't use enough lube. If one is bottoming correctly it shouldn't hurt.

I am versatile so I cum to this discussion from both sides.

I couldn't agree more. Enjoying sex is about giving pleasure to one another. It is an act of mutual loving. Stop worrying about whether you can feel his ejaculations. I am more concerned about your feeling coerced into bottoming.

Shep+

 

[paramedic_861]

I feel Jake every time he squirts and I love the feeling of him inside me...

 

[openthedark]

In my opinion this doesn't seem to be a very healthy sexual relationship. There certainly doesn't seem to be any sharing involved.

May I ask if you are satisfied with the sex that you do experience with him. Is anal sex for him something he does and once over so is anything else including satisfying you?

I can understand you not wanting to give up on the guy but there comes a stage when one begins to feel used and it is then one starts to go looking elsewhere.

I can't say I feel sexually satisfied. He is not only about himself though- he has tried rimming me and asks if I want a BJ, and also asks if there is anything else I would like to try.

Funny you mention that, because sometimes I do feel used and then after I feel resentful and am quiet. It is not his attitude, he is very loving, tries to include me even while he's ...doing me, and kisses me, holds me, etc. But I still feel that way after sometimes. He feels bad, and wants to do something about it, but all we've come up with is an open relationship which I do not want. I'm not sure what else to do. At this point, I am not going to leave him over this. Maybe I should just be happy with the rest of our relationship?

 

[dpnice]

If I have completely understood everything you are saying the synopsis goes as follows:

You are keen enough about this guy to want the relationship to work and last and apart from the sexual aspect you enjoy being with him.

Sexually he is only stimulated through anal sex which you are not keen on and you feel slightly abused and unsatisfied after it. Yet he seems desirous to give you pleasure and willing to satisfy you according to your needs.

You both communicate sufficiently to realise it is a problem and have talked about possible solutions.

I am not a sexologue and to give the best advice one would need, first, to bombard you with questions which probably JUB is not the best place for doing so. So here are some thoughts on the situation.

Sex is an important part of a relationship but not necessarily the most important. People can live in a loving and caring relationship void of any sex.

Sex is about sharing pleasure. You can give yourself to someone solely in order to give them pleasure and the reward is emotional rather than physical. It is about discovering what gives your partner pleasure and at the same time enabling him to discover your needs and desires.

So perhaps you need to change how you have sex and you may need to see anal sex as a means of giving him pleasure rather than as an ordeal. Make foreplay a more important and longer lasting aspect in bed. Initiate anal sex yourself when you are willing; try different positions. Ensure that he knows what stimulates you and get him to do it.

If you want ideas of what to do with each other to ensure a satisfying sex life I am certain that if you ask, try starting another thread, there will be many jubbers just raring to give you examples of what turns them on.

Good luck!

 

[KaraBulut]

I've moved this post to CO&R since it is more of a personal-relationship type of thread.