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Feelings of guilt/grossness after sex?

TrailofTears

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Does anyone else here become overwhelmed by feelings of guilt and dirtiness after they finish masturbating or having sex? It's like immediately after I climax, I have to clean myself up, remove all evidence, and find some other distraction as quickly as possible. This cycle repeats itself when I get horny again.

I would've thought this would end after I stopped being a teenager (I'm 24 now), but I suppose not.
 
For me, it might be the act of simply doing something sexual. To me, sexuality is an area of spontaneity, surrender, and vulnerability. I'm not really comfortable with any of that, probably because I don't reveal much to others because of a tendency to mistrust people. Plus, sex is often messy and I hate mess.

Paradoxically, I get horny a lot, so you can imagine my situation.
 
Seems like you have an issue with being human. That's a shame.

I mean, sure, go ahead and clean yourself up. But what the hell are you feeling guilty for? Is jerking off something a person is supposed to feel guilty about?
 
I was sure there was some mention of this phenomena in Shakespeare somewhere, but I can never seem to google it up when someone makes a post about it.
 
can't say that i do, closest thing I can think of was a guy I dated had to take a shower right after any thing sexual but it was because he found cum to be gross and didnt want it on him any where
 
I was sure there was some mention of this phenomena in Shakespeare somewhere, but I can never seem to google it up when someone makes a post about it.

Something about the little death and that after an orgasm, it brings about a sadness.
 
I do all the time. I have a real problem with sexuality in general. I feel uneasy when talking about who's attractive and I feel like a perv after touching myself...
 
I usually feel this way after I masturbate thinking of my best friend. I've always wanted to tell him how I feel knowing that things would only change slightly between us. I dont know why I do but it seems that when i'm done I feel guilty that thinking about him is wrong because he's so unattainable. for now.


other than that no idea why i get that way.
 
Interesting subject . I have noticed in myself a rather severe effect after orgasm that can best be described as " Oh my god I did that ? " . This effect obviously could not occur with people who always have more than one orgasm . For a few minutes after an orgasm I am Mr. Spock , purely sexless and rational : if x person is still attractive then they are . An equivalent instance might be food . After you've eaten enough or too much food becomes an abstraction , certainly pointless and at worst disgusting .
 
It's a pretty common condition even though it's burdening. Usually it's associated with low self-esteem and subjective thoughts that you breach through some regulation/ethics/norm you approve of.

Are you born in a highly rule-bound family? Or in an uptight Christian/Catholic family? Or do you feel your first sexual experience to be inappropriately done (e.g. with the wrong person or at the wrong time or in the wrong place, etc).

Anyway, a psychologist may help you. At least to find out what's causing it.
 
It's a pretty common condition even though it's burdening. Usually it's associated with low self-esteem and subjective thoughts that you breach through some regulation/ethics/norm you approve of.

Are you born in a highly rule-bound family? Or in an uptight Christian/Catholic family? Or do you feel your first sexual experience to be inappropriately done (e.g. with the wrong person or at the wrong time or in the wrong place, etc).

Anyway, a psychologist may help you. At least to find out what's causing it.
I think it's mainly because I'm pretty withdrawn in real life. As I said, for me to do something very intimate, it feels like I'm skinning myself and I feel very raw afterwards.
 
can't say that i do, closest thing I can think of was a guy I dated had to take a shower right after any thing sexual but it was because he found cum to be gross and didnt want it on him any where

I dated someone like that. I broke him of that obsessive nonsense by blowing my load on his chest, face, hair, groin, or in him, etc.... and forcing him to stay in bed for ______ minutes before letting him clean up. I gradually worked the time up by 5 or 10 mins every couple of weeks. After we broke up, and even to this day, he can now fall asleep with cum all over him / in him and not worry about cum.
 
I think it's mainly because I'm pretty withdrawn in real life. As I said, for me to do something very intimate, it feels like I'm skinning myself and I feel very raw afterwards.

Sounds like a control issue. Just realize that sex is messy, funny, humiliating, amazing, confounding, and a rush; often times all at once.
 
Back when I was in a relationship in my early 20's I felt like this nearly every time my partner and I had sex, because I am not okay with my sexuality.
 
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