The Original Gay Porn Community - Free Gay Movies and Photos, Gay Porn Site Reviews and Adult Gay Forums

  • Welcome To Just Us Boys - The World's Largest Gay Message Board Community

    In order to comply with recent US Supreme Court rulings regarding adult content, we will be making changes in the future to require that you log into your account to view adult content on the site.
    If you do not have an account, please register.
    REGISTER HERE - 100% FREE / We Will Never Sell Your Info

    PLEASE READ: To register, turn off your VPN (iPhone users- disable iCloud); you can re-enable the VPN after registration. You must maintain an active email address on your account: disposable email addresses cannot be used to register.

  • The Support & Advice forum is a no-flame zone.
    The members offering support and advice do so with the best intention. If you ask for advice, we don't require you to take the advice, but we do ask that you listen and give it consideration.

Finding the right person

hotatlboi said:
This is so right. I've met several friends on adam4adam and craigslist (friends as in we dont just see each other to have sex) and the perception is that those sites are only for hookups. There are other guys looking for other things too like friends and relationships.
Click to expand...

I agree with this somewhat. There are a lot of guys on the online sites that are there just for the hookups, but so what.

You have to laugh at people who disparage the bars or the sites because they don't immediately find true love there. Even if you're doing some approximation of hetero dating the vast majority of people you date you're not gonna fall in love with, and the percentage that love you back and want a relationship is even smaller. That's just life.

Most of us who are out are out some where in the gay social world, if you as a gay man are looking for love, you're better off putting yourself out there in the environment that enables you to associate with the largest pool of potential candidates.
 
Updated my profile but a4a doesn't want to acknowledge the change... I chatted with a couple more people through the dating sites. One I really wanted to meet, but he lives on the upper west side and I live almost smack in the middle of Long Island. Told him I thought he deserved someone who could be around on a more frequent basis. Would I like to leave LI? Yeah, but my finances don't allow that right now. There's another guy who I think is gorgeous, but am unsure if he wants to meet / would be into me. We'll see.
 
So I deleted my profiles off a4a and pof. Tried to become friends with this guy who works for the same company as I, albeit in different locations. Then sent him two followup messages and no response. A nosey straight female coworker of mine was talking about how weird it was that her father was messaging her on plentyoffish. No one else messaged me on the site, even after a few weeks so I made the choice to delete my profile there. As for adam4adam, after I changed my profile to represent me more, the number of messages I got plummeted. After some recent incidents of gay bashing, the craigslist killer, combined with the usual fear over STD transmission, rape, etc. my guard has been up. Just can't bring myself to meet some dude I don't know much about, regardless of how hot he is.

Meeting one of my long term online friends this weekend. I think he's really cool, but we haven't met face to face yet and he's a 6 hour drive away. Crossing my fingers, trying not to make the same mistakes I've made in the past. I thought about getting a job there and my own place, but I have a fear about making the wrong choice. Change is something I feel is needed though. 25 years in the same neighborhood, made a couple new friends over the past few years but they don't seem to really be fond of Long Island suburbia either. I'll go out on a limb and say 50% will be moving in the next 5 years.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top