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First bi experience...realized a few things.

L

latinfashionguy

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So..I was really bored yesterday and had the night off...while still feeling hurt over a particular girl. I decided I've never had a threesome before and have always wanted to. I reply to this ad on craigslist of an attractive couple looking for a "hot male". I was instantly attracted to her. I guess you could say, I didn't wanna go through all the courting BS you normally have to go through with a woman (the hot ones anyways) before sleeping with her, and thought I'd try this...and all the individual women on there are scams. So, we trade a few pics, talk on the phone briefly with her. I get to their apartment a few hours later. Well...now they want a bi threesome, instead of 2 guys on 1 girl. She asks me if I'd 'turn bi', and they chose me because he likes androgynous-looking men. I told them I've thought about this before, that I will do it, with limitations, only because I'm that attracted to her. So we get into a discussion...I tell her, I'll perform oral on him, as long as she's doing it at the same time...and that is it besides jacking him off. She tells me "I can put it anywhere". He then asks me if I'd fuck him or let him fuck me...I told him no. He says I can't fuck her then...she says she wants me to fuck her, he passively agrees. I said I didn't want a blowjob from him, but it was another one of his requirements for me to do anything with her. I talked to him alone for a few minutes and asked him how many guys he's been with, He says at least 5, but she only knows of one, and don't tell her. He even said he might prefer men, but they have a child together, and won't leave her. He told me there is something about a penis that turns him on in ways a woman cannot. I think he may actually be gay. We're having a few more drinks...by this point, she's starting to get close and wants to move things into the bedroom.

Ok, so everyone's had a few shots and we're feeling pretty good. She asks me if I want to do this...I told her ok, yeah. She instantly gets on top of me and kisses me passionately...he is just watching. She takes me pants off..starts giving me a blowjob. He tells me there is "no cumming allowed". We had planned to use condoms but she didn't want to...and we were kinda drunk. He then pulls out his cock and tells me to suck it with her because we agreed on that...I did it, and the only thing turning me on was her being involved...it actually seemed like an excuse for her and I to kiss more. My tongue was touching hers the entire time. Then, she wanted me to eat her out, and he wanted to suck me. I let him do it but it didn't turn me on. It didn't feel all that different, but just knowing it was a male really turned me off. For awhile, it was me and her fucking, and we were kissing a lot (lips never left each others for at least 5minutes), he wanted us to stop because he said we were "too intimate". She even licked my ass, fingered me..I liked it..too bad I can't find a girl like this just for me. It ended with him and I fucking her...I had her pussy, he had her ass. I wasn't allowed to cum inside so had to pull out. Having a man there took away from the overall experience...if it was just her and I alone the sex would have been phenomenal. She thanked me for everything later.

Anyways, I left in the morning before they woke up, texted her that I had a good time, but I realized they probably would prefer a guy who is into guys more, we can still hang out again if they want...basically saying thanks for the good time, and admitting that I knew he was mad without really saying it. It would be nice to see her again, the passion with her drove me crazy, but I don't think it will happen.

I'm not trying to proclaim myself as being so straight I can do this. I think every male has a natural curiosity, this experience actually helped me realize I was straight. Some people will argue if you do this even once, you are gay, I think they are the ones in denial.
 
latinfashionguy said:
Some people will argue if you do this even once, you are gay, I think they are the ones in denial.
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So if a gay guy has sex with a girl and doesn't like it, does it still "make him straight"? I always thought that kind of logic was really stupid.

I'm glad you had the opportunity, but are you still going to post here knowing you're straight?
 
Nomenclature said:
So if a gay guy has sex with a girl and doesn't like it, does it still "make him straight"? I always thought that kind of logic was really stupid.

I'm glad you had the opportunity, but are you still going to post here knowing you're straight?
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Just wanted to share my story...I'm sure there's other guys in similar situations, and maybe my experience can help them understand themselves better. I was just highlighting how society has these black/white definitions with sexuality, especially regarding men.
 
The complicated dos and don'ts coupled with the first time meeting and your impression that the guy is a douche might have had something to do with not liking sex with him.

You may be straight, but your rationale for this three way is a little flimsy. If you need to end your confusion stay away from bare hard dick. On the other hand, if you have any curiosity, find a nicer, hotter guy.
 
There was some curiosity on my end...and it's not there anymore. He is an attractive guy, was initially very nice. As he started to notice I was basically agreeing to do this, only because of my interest in her, it changed. I have no idea why he thought I would be more interested in him...he saw that I was very into fashion with an androgynous appeal and automatically assumed I was more into men. She was really aggressive, totally into me. Literally been thinking of her all day. Too bad she's taken.
 
Thanks for sharing your story. I agree, a lot of people have a very black and white perspective on sexuality. It's very interesting that you had the chance (rather, you sought out an opportunity) to experiment and you pretty much got an answer.

Kudos. One of the more honest and enlightening stories I've read.
 
willilikeit said:
Thanks for posting this.

Do you consider yourself bi now?

It sounds like you totally prefer ladies.
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He still prefers women. I think that's his point--that he could get sucked off by another guy, not really like it, and still be straight. And that's cool--men should be able to experiment without having to be automatically labeled gay or bi. He tried and didn't find it was his thing...that's fine. It's more than I can say for many.

Also, I'm glad that he pointed out that "androgynous-looking and fashion-loving" =/'= "gay," as much as middle America thinks it is. Or gay men for that matter.
 
You can go from being bi-curious to straight. I agree that its good for men to have the freedom that women were claiming 20 years ago to try it and decide for themselves.
 
bankside said:
You can go from being bi-curious to straight.
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I've spoken to a few guys who've done exactly the same thing.


This just goes to show you that attraction definitely is not a choice. I remember how scared and uncertain I was until I enjoyed my first kiss with a guy. Later, I found myself having a conversation with a man about going out, and it was then that I realized I was capable of going to the next level with a guy. THAT'S what completely solidified the fact that I was gay.
 
Well I've had extremely limited experience with another guy...okay once...but I came away with a better understanding on how I felt. Or at least how I felt at the moment.
To be honest, with a women I am much more concerned with her experience. I'm not saying I'm a completely selfless lover or anything, but it is a priority. When I was with the one guy it was about my cock and what made it feel good. Granted, he really, really made it feel good, but it was a significantly selfish experience. That being said, I am still left wanting to experience it again, with someone different, and see if its still selfish, or if it was just the individual. Maybe it was typical of a "first time". I don't know. I don't personally care for titles so I don't know if that makes me "bi" or not....I prefer to consider myself open minded.
 
bankside said:
You can go from being bi-curious to straight. I agree that its good for men to have the freedom that women were claiming 20 years ago to try it and decide for themselves.
Click to expand...

Its' true. At least you were open minded enough to try it and find out!
 
willilikeit said:
Thanks for posting this.

Do you consider yourself bi now?

It sounds like you totally prefer ladies.
Click to expand...

To be honest, no. I don't have any attraction to men, would I cross the line again if a woman was also involved and I was very attracted to her? Possibly, but I would have to very attracted to her like I was with this woman. She'd be great for me if she was single. I could tell he was upset I was only into her, it made for a strange vibe. He said more than once I was too intimate with her, that we were "kissing too much". There is no way I could ever kiss a man. I kept going from such strong attraction to her then having none for him, but I'm glad I went through the experience.

I had always considered myself slightly curious, and because of my look/style, society probably would consider me gay, although women and men alike usually find me attractive. I think any man with an androgynous appeal goes through life being questioned as gay, although not all of us are. It's also possible for a man who looks completely masculine to be gay (bears for example) - I don't think enough people understand that, although it seems to be well-known in the gay community.

If anything, I relate to gay men well, in some ways, better than straight. For one, I understand what it is like to have others belittle you over your sexuality, except I don't fall into the category. I also grew up in a "machismo" culture that expects all men to behave in a devastatingly masculine fashion. Sometimes people tell me until they actually talked to me, they had wondered if I was gay. I work in the hair industry as well, which is heavily stereotyped. I also have "straight" interests such as football, poker, entourage, etc. I sound straight, although I consider myself more soft-spoken than average. I consider my thought process to be similar to that of every other straight alpha male, I'm constantly checking out women, seeing how far I can take flirting, that sort of thing. Society is so locked into gay stereotypes even this day and age, it's really sad.. Besides the usually heavy-set girl with "lots of gay friends", most people really do hold onto these archaic beliefs.
 
Last year around this time, I had a situation where my cousin's fiancee wouldn't stop making advances towards me. At first, I thought it was just his way of joking around, then he started to get more aggressive with it, and I came here to ask for advice. I ended up removing myself from the situation, never said anything to my cousin about it. Part of the reason being, no one in my family would ever assume him to be gay, he's very macho. It would all have been turned on me had I said anything, just wasn't worth the trouble.

I came back to post this latest experience and what I learned from it.
 
I thank you for sharing your experience and especially your honesty. My best friend is straighter than "straight," but that hasn't stopped him from "experimenting" with me on several occasions. He was certain that his love for and of me would overcome his innate heterosexuality ... alas, his cock never achieved more than a "semi-erection." *sigh*

Lol ... on a lighter note, he and I kiss publicly more often than all of my gay friends combined! And as for the rampant gossip mills of he and I being a couple - he's always taken that as a compliment! Gotta love that guy!
 
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