First Time ?'s

[edgeattraction]

Hey everyone. I'm looking into have my first sexual experience, but I have a few questions. I really want to stay in the closet and I have fears of running into this guy while on the job (retail) or say in a grocery store while with family...what are these run-in's like, and are they embarassing if you have someone else with you? For example, I usually take my mom grocery/hobby shopping on the weekends and I don't want her to find out in that kind of way.

Thanks.

 

[3nipples]

Typically I would be discreet when meeting up with a guy in the situation you describe, not knowing his situation. Most of the guys I know do the same and look for clues from you or wait for a chance to ask in an aside if the others "know".... but mistakes happen.

 

[edgeattraction]

Well my main concern is after the hookup and seeing my past partner around town while with family or friends. I mean, I don't know if I would even say hi or anything. I'm just new to all this and pretty nervous...but ready at the same time.

 

[sixthson]

Until you are ready to accept what happens after sex, you are probably not ready to have sex.

If you are planning casual sex, you may never know what your hook up is like. He could be a stalker or he could fall in love with you and never stop calling. He may want more when you don't. What if you fall in love with him and he rejects you? Sex has a way of changing things between people.

If you are talking about forming a relationship with a guy, he should know up front that you are closeted and intend to remain that way, at least for the time being. You will need his discretion and you will need to know you can trust him.
Secrets in the wrong hands don't remain secrets for long.
If you can't risk others finding out, you better stick with masturbation until you can.

You can imagine all sorts of awkward situations, but you cannot anticipate all of them.

Personally, let me suggest you find a guy you like, form a friendship and see where it goes. Sex and love are a beautiful duet.

Good luck.

 

[Eagle653]

While I agree with sixthson's comments and advice, I confess that I did not routinely follow them when I was single and closeted.

I fooled around with my share of guys. And, yes, on more than a few occasions I did bump into them in public places. Sometimes they even had wives in tow (some of whom I knew about, and some not lol--oh well). Anyhow, we just nodded heads, or muttered a brief "howyadoin'" and moved on--like you would any acquaintance from the neighborhood, the gym, or work. It's not like either of us loudly proclaimed "Gee, I've been thinking of you lately--I'm so horny! Sex with you was the best yet!" or anything! lol You just play it cool. I've even run across people shopping that were alone and I was alone. Again, "that topic" never really came up. When you're in a public place, you keep the party manners on. We sometimes just did the nod or "howyadoin'" thing, or, if I really liked/knew the person, might catch up on news of the day--just like any normal guys would who hadn't seen each other recently. It never attracted any attention at all.

I've run across guys who were so closeted that they had all sorts of doomsday scenarios built up in their mind and they became so paranoid that they were paralyzed into not doing anything. I guess that's a shame, although others might think that's a good thing. I don't know. Anyway, sex is infinitely more fun when it's with someone you know well/love and when you aren't deathly afraid of seeing the person again or getting caught.

Good luck!

 

[timnmostud]

While I agree with sixthson's comments and advice, I confess that I did not routinely follow them when I was single and closeted.

I fooled around with my share of guys. And, yes, on more than a few occasions I did bump into them in public places. Sometimes they even had wives in tow (some of whom I knew about, and some not lol--oh well). Anyhow, we just nodded heads, or muttered a brief "howyadoin'" and moved on--like you would any acquaintance from the neighborhood, the gym, or work. It's not like either of us loudly proclaimed "Gee, I've been thinking of you lately--I'm so horny! Sex with you was the best yet!" or anything! lol You just play it cool. I've even run across people shopping that were alone and I was alone. Again, "that topic" never really came up. When you're in a public place, you keep the party manners on. We sometimes just did the nod or "howyadoin'" thing, or, if I really liked/knew the person, might catch up on news of the day--just like any normal guys would who hadn't seen each other recently. It never attracted any attention at all.

I've run across guys who were so closeted that they had all sorts of doomsday scenarios built up in their mind and they became so paranoid that they were paralyzed into not doing anything. I guess that's a shame, although others might think that's a good thing. I don't know. Anyway, sex is infinitely more fun when it's with someone you know well/love and when you aren't deathly afraid of seeing the person again or getting caught.

Good luck!

What he said! Maybe that's a Missouri thing, Averageguy!

 

[sanosuke1712]

the first time i jerked off was at a boy scout camping trip i didn't no how to do it and this to friends tolled my how to the talk got so bad that 1 of them got a boner so when i got back to my tent and every 1 was sleeping and i cadent sleep i started jerking of a hafe hour want by and then i birst