First timer stuff

[Laboyes]

So I'm not a prude anymore! Typing this is going a bit against the grain, but I'm also quite happy to do so. I've been seeing this guy I like. We had oral sex today, and I've got tons of stuff to ask.

Foremost, the guy gets me super horny, which may actually be a problem. I have been producing more precum than I thought was possible. My underwear was literally soaked the other night after just walking around holding his hand. He stopped giving me head pretty quickly, though, and I'm afraid I liked it so much I must have been making tons of precum. He said he didn't like the taste after I swallowed his. How would I fix it if I turn into a leaky faucet while he's going down on me?

On that note, I liked giving head a lot. I even like the way he tastes, although he didn't cum too much. Unfortunately, I sucked at it. I have hardly seen uncut cocks in porn and he said I was hurting him a couple of times when I played with his foreskin. It took me forever to get him off, and I basically needed​ him to guide my head to get him to climax. How do I fix this?

Also, I might just be exhibiting my old person tendencies once again, but I really didn't care about getting off. He sucked me for a little, but the most pleasant parts were the general touching and my sucking him and all that. He seemed good, loads better than me. Still, just touching him was enough for me. I spent most of my time just laughing at myself and asking him to confirm that I was doing everything right, and it felt really nice. Is this a weird attitude?

Finally, he didn't want to have real sex. I said I didn't have a preference, and he seemed to think about it for a bit. In the end he didn't want to go any further. I can think of only the reasons why:

He knows I'm a virgin and doesn't want to throw me into stuff too quickly. I'm too skeptical of my own sex to think that, and this kid's lack of attunement to my body language leads me to think he doesn't have quite the level of empathy to refrain like that. However, my self-consciousness makes me think he thought I'd go mad if we went that far and fall head over heels over him (joke's on him, 'cause I'm pretty ecstatic already).

There was some physiological reason that he wasn't able to go through with anal. The rational part of me wants to go with this assumption.

Yeah, so I guess what do I do with myself? It's absurdly late, so the preceding might just be jibber jabber. I'm not totally sure.

 

[KaraBulut]

... the guy gets me super horny, which may actually be a problem. ... I must have been making tons of precum. He said he didn't like the taste after I swallowed his. How would I fix it if I turn into a leaky faucet while he's going down on me?

You can't really turn off precum. It is a sign that your body is excited and wants to have sex. You will find that the "super horniness" falls into perspective the more that you explore with this guy. The first few times are always intense but as you get more comfortable with the person, it won't be as intense each time.

By the way, there are some guys who are incredible turned on by precum. You might want to consider your leaky faucet to be a positive thing, even if your current partner doesn't appreciate it. Your future partners may feel differently.

...On that note, I liked giving head a lot. I even like the way he tastes, although he didn't cum too much. Unfortunately, I sucked at it. I have hardly seen uncut cocks in porn and he said I was hurting him a couple of times when I played with his foreskin. It took me forever to get him off, and I basically needed​ him to guide my head to get him to climax. How do I fix this?

General rule is that with circumcised guys- more head, less shaft. With uncircumcised guys, less head, more shaft.

But that rule doesn't hold true with all guys. The most important thing is to pay attention and get feedback from your partner about what he enjoys.

...Also, I might just be exhibiting my old person tendencies once again, but I really didn't care about getting off...Still, just touching him was enough for me. I spent most of my time just laughing at myself and asking him to confirm that I was doing everything right, and it felt really nice. Is this a weird attitude?

When you don't get off, you're cheating your partner of the satisfaction of getting you off. The difference between NSA sex and relationship sex is that with NSA sex, it's all about you and what you want. With relationship sex, it's about compromise and doing a little of what you like and a little of what the other person likes.

The first few times, it's not unusual to be hard as a rock but unable to come with a new partner. You may need to jack yourself off to finish. But as you relax and as you get more comfortable with the other person (and with yourself), your partner will be able to make you come (and with time, he will learn what it takes to get you off).

...Finally, he didn't want to have real sex. I said I didn't have a preference, and he seemed to think about it for a bit. In the end he didn't want to go any further. I can think of only the reasons why:

If by "real sex", you mean anal sex, then you're falling into the trap that all sex is like porn sex. Not all sex starts with oral and finishes with anal. A quickie blowjob in the car is sex. Jacking each other off before falling asleep is sex. Fucking the hell out of each other is sex. Each variation has its place and its own appeal.

...Yeah, so I guess what do I do with myself? It's absurdly late, so the preceding might just be jibber jabber. I'm not totally sure.

Listen: good sex is like a buffet. You aren't expected to like everything on the buffet but the more things you try, the more likely you are to know what you want to get when you go back for seconds.

Stop overthinking things. When it come to sex, be in the moment and enjoy it for what it is. When you're ready to try anal, take it slow and know that the first time doesn't always go that great, so you may need to try it a few times before you know whether you like it.

 

[Laboyes]

You can't really turn off precum. It is a sign that your body is excited and wants to have sex... there are some guys who are incredible turned on by precum.

Fair points. I guess I'll just ask him.

General rule is that with circumcised guys- more head, less shaft. With uncircumcised guys, less head, more shaft.

But that rule doesn't hold true with all guys. The most important thing is to pay attention and get feedback from your partner about what he enjoys.

That's what he was saying, but I couldn't really figure out how to physically achieve that effect. I hadn't realized the physical challenge of the act, but just in regard to what to do with my head and mouth I was having trouble.

...The difference between NSA sex and relationship sex is that with NSA sex, it's all about you and what you want. With relationship sex, it's about compromise and doing a little of what you like and a little of what the other person likes.

I pretty much liked every minute of it. It mightn't have been the most sexy sex because of all my giggling and talking and asking him what he'd like me to do. Still, it was ridiculously fun. I'm sure the word I'll use later will be "interesting."

If by "real sex", you mean anal sex, then you're falling into the trap that all sex is like porn sex. Not all sex starts with oral and finishes with anal. A quickie blowjob in the car is sex. Jacking each other off before falling asleep is sex. Fucking the hell out of each other is sex. Each variation has its place and its own appeal.

I will keep that in mind. My mindset is probably not too great right now.

Listen: good sex is like a buffet. You aren't expected to like everything on the buffet but the more things you try, the more likely you are to know what you want to get when you go back for seconds.

Stop overthinking things. When it come to sex, be in the moment and enjoy it for what it is. When you're ready to try anal, take it slow and know that the first time doesn't always go that great, so you may need to try it a few times before you know whether you like it.

I'm kind of a "jump in face first" sort of person. I started the night just thinking we'd explore one another's bodies and changed to telling him I was down for anything by midnight. I can see experimenting pretty quickly. Regardless, it'll probably keep being at least fun.

Thanks!

 

[Laboyes]

I don't think this city agrees with me. I haven't been able to cum but once in the time I've been here.

That first boy was a college kid with an educated mouth, but my head still proved to be too much for him to stimulate. :/

I've also had problems just getting off in general. How do people orgasm when they aren't in a comfortable location, 'cause I think that's my problem.

 

[ballcaphair]

I don't think this city agrees with me. I haven't been able to cum but once in the time I've been here.

That first boy was a college kid with an educated mouth, but my head still proved to be too much for him to stimulate. :/

I've also had problems just getting off in general. How do people orgasm when they aren't in a comfortable location, 'cause I think that's my problem.

Follow your heart. It seems you've decided already. You can be happy or unhappy anywhere. You sound unhappy. If you've got a happy place in mind, go there. Fall into it with abandon.

 

[Seasoned]

Congrats on meeting this guy and having a fun, giggling time. That's my idea of a sexual good time. Whatever makes you and your partner happy is the right thing to be doing.

Some people are more sensitive to thoughts, sights, sounds, smell, touch, and feelings than others. I'm definitely one of the sensitive ones. It takes me a long time to orgasm, for example, while my husband can pretty much time his. We're all different.

I got the vague sense that you're using porn scenarios and comparing yourself to them. Don't. Just explore with your sex partner(s). And allow for a variety of activity. As far as anal sex being "real sex," I'd advise you not to fall into that trap. It may, indeed, eventually be your favorite sexual activity, but it's ok if it's not.

Practical advice as to blow jobs, I'd would have been extremely turned on if my husband to be would have told me he wanted to take a chunk of time to learn how to blow me. Maybe that is something you could try. The thing you have to be most careful of with an uncut cock is to not pull the foreskin down the shaft too forcibly. Sometime with the lights on playfully examine it. You'll notice where it is attached and will begin to understand how it would be possible to cause injury if too rough. Also, as the head is covered it is generally more sensitive but not always. One guy may not what you peeling back the skin when you blow him, but it might be another guy needs.

As far as your precum is concerned, you can't control the amount, but some say you can influence the flavor. Generally if the guy is seriously blowing you and producing a lot of saliva, he wouldn't necessarily know how much precum you're producing.

Best wishes and have fun exploring!

 

[Laboyes]

I'll definitely keep having fun, but I think that guy's gone. I'm hoping the next batter will be a bit more similar to me physically, 'cause while exploring someone else's body is an interesting experience I would like to learn with someone familiar then generalize to other people later.

That sounds vaguely regimented, but it is what it is. Anyway, the advice on the blowjob was good, and he said I was getting much better at it, so that's fun.

The people with whom I've spoken in person have a tendency to disregard my (s)experience, saying I'm still a virgin until there's some form of penetration. It isn't just porn stuff, but either way I don't care. It's all been an interesting, invigorating experience.

 

[hardreader]

This is fascinating. I loved your pictures and I love your openness to sharing even more!

 

[ballcaphair]

I'll definitely keep having fun, but I think that guy's gone. I'm hoping the next batter will be a bit more similar to me physically, 'cause while exploring someone else's body is an interesting experience I would like to learn with someone familiar then generalize to other people later.

That sounds vaguely regimented, but it is what it is. Anyway, the advice on the blowjob was good, and he said I was getting much better at it, so that's fun.

The people with whom I've spoken in person have a tendency to disregard my (s)experience, saying I'm still a virgin until there's some form of penetration. It isn't just porn stuff, but either way I don't care. It's all been an interesting, invigorating experience.

I so understand this. I think we share hearts.

 

[Laboyes]

So an opportunity to have a threesome with two pretty attractive looking chaps has turned up. I'm still on the fence about this, 'cause I'll probably be overwhelmed if it does end up happening. I just asked whether we can postpone 'til tomorrow (after I get some proof that they're real people).

Should be a fun time.

 

[Georgiadude]

I think you might be over thinking things a bit. Its just sex and there really isn't a right or wrong way to do things. Each person likes different things. There's nothing wrong with asking someone what they like, grip strength, speed, if there's certain areas of their body feel good or tickle. Its all just a part of learning and enjoying things. Its like anything we do. With more experience, trial and error you'll become more comfortable with sex. Relax and enjoy it.

Dont get too self conscious about pre cumming so much. I don't even have to be fully erect for it to start. Most of the guys I've been with love it. A few didn't care for it but it is what it is. There really isn't a way to change it.

My ex bf wasn't circumcised. His was the first uncut penis I played with. In the beginning he'd tell me I was pulling his foreskin down too far or working the head too much because it was really sensitive for him. Us circumcised guys need to stimulate the head more and our grips tend to be more firm. I asked Igor what worked best for him. It wasn't awkward at all. I just hadn't had any experience with an intact guy. Trust me. Most sex partners will be more than willing to tell what they like and what they don't. Again there's no right or wrong. Its just a matter of finding out what works for them. Pay attention to how he responds. Does his dick twitch when you hit a certain spot? Vary the speed and grip. With an uncircumcised guy you may only need to slide the foreskin over the head with your thumb and index finger. There's nothing wrong with asking him to show you how he jerks off. Pay attention to his balls and the "taint" area between his balls and butt hole. Gently rub it, lick it, apply a little pressure and make circular motions with your hand. Gently suck his balls into your mouth. You may be able to get both of them in your mouth or just do one at a time. Watch his face. A grimace will tell you it's not pleasurable for him.

The fella in your first point didn't sound like he was into things with you that much. Who knows why. Those are his issues. Don't let it get in your head. Some experiences are going to be better than others. You may not always gel with the guys you're with. Its to be expected. Especially with hook ups but with anyone for that matter, don't be afraid to say something isn't working for you or you aren't comfortable with something. If he doesn't listen or pressures you into something get dressed and leave. I've done it a few times.

Im sure you may have known a lot of what I wrote but I hope some of it helped. Just enjoy yourself. You aren't being graded on your performance. Its supposed to be fun and enjoyable for both of you.

Steven

 

[Laboyes]

Got to learn the joys of prepping for anal today. The operating adverb on the disposable thing's packaging was "gently." I probably can't tell anyone here anything they don't know.

 

[Laboyes]

... And the couple with whom I'm supposed to be "playing" today has yet to contact me back. If I went through that shit for no reason someone's going to die.

 

[KaraBulut]

... And the couple with whom I'm supposed to be "playing" today has yet to contact me back. If I went through that shit for no reason someone's going to die.

Well, part of the responsibility of being sexual active- especially with multiple partners- is STD testing. So, even if you do end up hearing from the couple you're "playing" with, there's still "shit" that you're going to have to go through afterward.

 

[Laboyes]

Well, part of the responsibility of being sexual active- especially with multiple partners- is STD testing. So, even if you do end up hearing from the couple you're "playing" with, there's still "shit" that you're going to have to go through afterward.

Of course. I just meant the physically traumatic experience through which I put myself for essentially no return.

 

[KaraBulut]

Of course. I just meant the physically traumatic experience through which I put myself for essentially no return.

On one hand, the fun of being young is trying new things and new experiences.

On the other hand, perhaps it's better to slow things down instead of going through all these travails?

 

[Laboyes]

On one hand, the fun of being young is trying new things and new experiences.

On the other hand, perhaps it's better to slow things down instead of going through all these travails?

I've been talking to a guy down home over text since I left. He and I are going to try to work something out, 'cause I've got to get back there soon enough. I'm only rushing so that I have some experience when I get to be with him, even if it has its own expiration date.

Bought my first sex toy today.

 

[kallipolis]

“Life is what happens to us while we are making other plans.”― Allen Saunders

Life's experiences take a life time. Don't rush. Enjoy the journey moment, by moment there being an end.