Frequency of Sex and Incontinence

[NewStart]

Ok, so this has really started to affect my sex life. I'm in a happy relationship and my boyfriend has a very active sex drive. I've only ever had anal sex with him, and it has become an important part of our sex life. We've been dating for about 8 months, 3 of which we've spent living together, which means every night his boner is poking into me and its great

A couple of weeks back, I read this post on JUB linking to a research study on receptive anal sex and incontinence. Given the quasi-hypochondriac that I am, I've seriously cut down on anal sex since. And even when I do bottom, I feel kinda loose well into the next day. Maybe its just my mind playing games with me...i don't know.

My bf is around 7" and is a bit on the thicker side (not too thick tho). We (used to) have sex 2-3 times a week, and since he's extremely gentle, I've almost never bled and its never uncomfortable, 'cause we go really slow (at first). While its difficult to keep track of time, our sessions last long with around 15 min (sometimes up to 20 minutes, i guess) of fucking in different position with some rest in between. We are not into extreme anal play, like large dildos or fisting. (ouch).

The big question is that is there a real risk of incontinence given my sexual habits? I've really cut down on sex because of this fear, and when we do have sex, the fear of somehow getting loose down there really mars the otherwise intense pleasure and intimacy.

What do I do? Is there a recommended frequency of sex which is safe? If you're in a relationship, how frequently do you have sex?

Study 1: http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/8459377
Study 2: http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/9068471
Health Advice 1: Here
Health Advice 2: Here

The ASCRS textbook of colon and rectal surgery: Page 654

Also, more information can be found on wikipedia articles on incontinence and anal sex. Some sources suggest that there is a high correlation between regular anal sex and incontinence, while other studies suggest that its statistically insignificant.

HELP!!!!!!!

 

[KaraBulut]

Here's the problem with the studies:

Anal manometry measures the pressure "tone" of the anus by sticking a foreign object in it.

If you are a guy who doesn't normally have something up your ass, your ass is more likely to tighten up.

If you are a guy who is used to having something up his ass, you've trained your ass to relax when something is in it.

So, all these studies have really measured is the ability of people who are used to having something up their ass to relax when something is put up their ass.

Stop worrying about this and start worrying about enjoying your sex life.

Life's too short.

 

[bluepheonix]

No disruptions of the IAS or EAS were identified in either the anoreceptive or control group. Anoreceptive men tended to have thinner anal sphincters than controls, but the difference was not statistically significant. Furthermore, there were no complaints of fecal incontinence by the study subjects. CONCLUSIONS: Passive ARI is associated with decreased resting anal canal pressures, but total pressures are normal. There were no IAS or EAS defects, as well as no fecal incontinence, in our subjects. Better relaxation of the ARI subjects during anal canal manometry may explain the lower resting pressures.

http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/9068471

There were no significant differences in stoll consistency, frequency of defaecation, perineal descent or rectal sensation between the groups. ARI is associated with reduced resting pressure in the anal canal and an increased risk of anal incontinence. The risk of incontinence is greatest amongst AR subjects with reduced maximum squeeze pressure.

http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/8459377

RESULTS: Resting pressures were significantly lower in subjects engaging in ARI (70.7 +/- 3.2 mm Hg vs. 91.4 +/- 5.2 mm Hg; mean +/- SEM, p < 0.003), whereas there was no significant difference in the mean maximum squeeze pressures, compared with controls (177.1 +/- 14.1 mm Hg vs. 151.8 +/- 19.6 mm Hg; mean +/- SEM, p = 0.32)

http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/9068471

Many receptive partners experience stool incontinence (leaking of stool or poor control) when they have anal sphincter tone decrease.

Firstly i would note the conditionality of first to the second half of that sentence, also question the use or accuracy of the term "many" in medical advice. The 'many' experiencing actual occurrence of fecal incontinence talked about does not seem backed up by the talk from the previous two studies, only the symptoms (whereby i interpreted them stating the symptoms of lower resting pressure associated but not indicative of fecal incontinence, rather than actual occurrence of fecal incontinence, which i interpreted them as saying was not experienced by any members of either test group.)

When a penis or object initially enters the rectum, it pushes against the internal sphincter, which contracts immediately. During the initial insertion, it is very important that the “bottom” or receptive partner have full control. If inserted too deeply, too quickly, the penis or object can cause pain or even push through the closed sphincter causing an anal tear. Although the threat of fecal incontinence from anal sex is small, it can occur from repeated injury to the internal sphincter. This occurs when a penis is repeatedly inserted through a contracted internal sphincter. Over time the muscle may be unable to properly seal tightly, resulting in fecal incontinence. Rates increase with fisting and insertion of large sex toys into the anus.

http://healthydevil.studentaffairs.duke.edu/health_info/Anal Stimulation and Intercourse.html
All in all from the sources you have provided i would conclude that so long as you take things slow initially, stop if theres pain, and dont do anything outrageously stupid over and over and over again, then your risk of fecal incontinence whilst still perhaps slightly elevated in comparison to the rest of the population, is still, as you said, statistically insignificant.

Happy 'poking',
Blue

 

[NewStart]

Thanks guys, this really help.

 

[blahblahblah2007]

This has become a huge fear of mine lately.

I have another question. Because I am with a guy right now who is very large (at least 7, probably 8 inches and very thick, I have been worried about how far up there he is going. I think I took it a little too fast a few times and have noticed discomfort in my ass the last few days. It doesn't help my worried self that I have also had horrible gas the last two days, but I am certain that's from something I ate.

In this picture, is there another "valve" or sphincter around #28? Because my fear is that I will be relaxed down around my asshole but further up inside, his dick is banging into another opening.

I don't want to become incontinent, with gas or with stools.

 

[KaraBulut]

What you are seeing at 28 is the junction of the large intestine and the rectum. The large intestine wraps around from the left side of the body where the rectums connects downward to the anus.

A 7 inch penis would barely reach that far unless you have a very shallow anal cleft.

I've made this comment in the forum before- what comes out of your ass is as thick (or thicker) and as long (or even longer) than a penis.

However, feces are not as rigid and do not pound your ass. It is your partner's technique that is the problem here, not his size.

 

[NewStart]

I'll share a very unscientific observation with you. I posted this about a year back, and have been having sex around at least 4 days a week. My bf is around 6" and very thick, and i don't feel the least bit loose or, god forbid, incontinent. As long as you stay from extreme things like fisty, you should be fine.

Now go forth and copulate.

 

[chrisw87]

That image makes me wonder if they literally just cut a cadaver in half... and if they did, DAMN that is a very sharp object.

 

[KaraBulut]

That image makes me wonder if they literally just cut a cadaver in half... and if they did, DAMN that is a very sharp object.

Yes, it's called a sagittal section.