No idea how to deal with this situation so I was hoping to get some advice on here. This is only my perspective, so any advice or different points of view is welcome. Here's what went down:
I met this guy, we'll call him B, about two months ago. It was purely for hooking up at first, but overtime we started talking and hanging out. We have become pretty close as friends. As a friends with benefits, I trusted him with only two rules on the benefits part of our friendship:
1. Tell each other if we hook up with someone else to prevent STDs.
2. The benefits end if we enter a serious relationship.
Because of these rules I trusted that we wasn't hooking up with anyone else and wasn't currently in a relationship. He told me about his recent dating/sexual history and how he had broken up and cheated on a girlfriend a month before we met. I was fine with it because he was willing to tell me and we weren't dating.
During our time together, I did notice he'd get random calls and texts late into the night. I figured this was from a booty call and didn't care as long as he was honest about them. He told me it was from a friend, nicknamed on his phone as Drama. He said Drama was a friend of his who made a big deal out of everything. I'd ask him if he had hooked up with anyone else just to be sure, and he told me he hadn't yet.
The whole friends with benefits was working pretty good up until today. I finally came face to face with this Drama character. B and I were hanging out when he got a phone call. B then rushed me out and told him he was getting a random visit from his mom. I ran over to the back gate and waited for him to open it up for me, because he had told me to stay there until he came. As he rushed to open the gate, I started to hear yelling going on from inside. "WHO THE FUCK IS HERE!?" I was worried that we had been caught so I rushed out in hopes of getting to my car without being seen. Instead I had a dude three times my size chasing me with his fist aimed at my head. I successfully escaped into the street and turned to watch my friend with benefits get a punch to the face. I panicked, and turned right into a flight response. Jumped into my car and raced home.
I calmed a bit at my place and quickly called a friend to vent my situation. I was considering going back in order see the aftermath of the event. I figured this would be the only time I could get the truth and understand what was going on. Instead, I found B and Drama at my doorstep and Drama demanded I come out and talk. It was uneasy and awkward. I remained quiet, Drama ordered me to speak and he told B to shut up. I decided to talk to Drama alone.
Turns out Drama has been dating B for the last three years. The only reason why he didn't end things was because he liked the family. I felt sorry, and couldn't believe what I just got myself into. I was questioned for a bit in front of B, he wanted to see our stories line up. He then left B and told me to bring him home. He also said that he was going to out B.
I was confused, sad, and felt a little betrayed. But I at the time, all I really wanted were answers. B told me that he had been trying to break up with Drama for months. B, however, is in the closet, and Drama had threatened to use that against him if they break up. B told me he was going to break up with him within the first year, but Drama outed him to two of his close friends. They stopped talking to him and he became worried that Drama would indeed out him. This pattern occurred with numerous of his friends over the last three years. I didn't know what to believe, but I ensured him I'd stick around for support because despite the events of today, I still trusted him.
We went back to his place and I found everything trashed. The TV was broken, the laptop was broken, juice was poured all over the place, broken picture frames. B then told me he didn't want me involved, but Drama had pulled a knife on him. I stayed, just trying to comfort him and figure out what the hell just happened. I left eventually though because B's sister was coming over to talk to him about something.
I later found out that Drama went through with his claims. He outed B to his friends and his sister. He is still threatening to cause more trouble to the both of us. I'm slightly worried as to what this guy is capable of. He's already said he'd post naked pictures of B all over their campus. He also made B read a letter he had written to his mom which seems to twisted story of the events today. Drama is now using the letter as blackmail, asking B to apologize and come back to him.
I'm confused. I'm not sure what to believe, but oddly enough I still trust B's word. I want to help him out, not sure what to do though. What do you guys think? Should I just leave this all alone? Am I wrong to still consider B a friend? Am I being naive? I do feel responsible as the catalyst of this event though.
I met this guy, we'll call him B, about two months ago. It was purely for hooking up at first, but overtime we started talking and hanging out. We have become pretty close as friends. As a friends with benefits, I trusted him with only two rules on the benefits part of our friendship:
1. Tell each other if we hook up with someone else to prevent STDs.
2. The benefits end if we enter a serious relationship.
Because of these rules I trusted that we wasn't hooking up with anyone else and wasn't currently in a relationship. He told me about his recent dating/sexual history and how he had broken up and cheated on a girlfriend a month before we met. I was fine with it because he was willing to tell me and we weren't dating.
During our time together, I did notice he'd get random calls and texts late into the night. I figured this was from a booty call and didn't care as long as he was honest about them. He told me it was from a friend, nicknamed on his phone as Drama. He said Drama was a friend of his who made a big deal out of everything. I'd ask him if he had hooked up with anyone else just to be sure, and he told me he hadn't yet.
The whole friends with benefits was working pretty good up until today. I finally came face to face with this Drama character. B and I were hanging out when he got a phone call. B then rushed me out and told him he was getting a random visit from his mom. I ran over to the back gate and waited for him to open it up for me, because he had told me to stay there until he came. As he rushed to open the gate, I started to hear yelling going on from inside. "WHO THE FUCK IS HERE!?" I was worried that we had been caught so I rushed out in hopes of getting to my car without being seen. Instead I had a dude three times my size chasing me with his fist aimed at my head. I successfully escaped into the street and turned to watch my friend with benefits get a punch to the face. I panicked, and turned right into a flight response. Jumped into my car and raced home.
I calmed a bit at my place and quickly called a friend to vent my situation. I was considering going back in order see the aftermath of the event. I figured this would be the only time I could get the truth and understand what was going on. Instead, I found B and Drama at my doorstep and Drama demanded I come out and talk. It was uneasy and awkward. I remained quiet, Drama ordered me to speak and he told B to shut up. I decided to talk to Drama alone.
Turns out Drama has been dating B for the last three years. The only reason why he didn't end things was because he liked the family. I felt sorry, and couldn't believe what I just got myself into. I was questioned for a bit in front of B, he wanted to see our stories line up. He then left B and told me to bring him home. He also said that he was going to out B.
I was confused, sad, and felt a little betrayed. But I at the time, all I really wanted were answers. B told me that he had been trying to break up with Drama for months. B, however, is in the closet, and Drama had threatened to use that against him if they break up. B told me he was going to break up with him within the first year, but Drama outed him to two of his close friends. They stopped talking to him and he became worried that Drama would indeed out him. This pattern occurred with numerous of his friends over the last three years. I didn't know what to believe, but I ensured him I'd stick around for support because despite the events of today, I still trusted him.
We went back to his place and I found everything trashed. The TV was broken, the laptop was broken, juice was poured all over the place, broken picture frames. B then told me he didn't want me involved, but Drama had pulled a knife on him. I stayed, just trying to comfort him and figure out what the hell just happened. I left eventually though because B's sister was coming over to talk to him about something.
I later found out that Drama went through with his claims. He outed B to his friends and his sister. He is still threatening to cause more trouble to the both of us. I'm slightly worried as to what this guy is capable of. He's already said he'd post naked pictures of B all over their campus. He also made B read a letter he had written to his mom which seems to twisted story of the events today. Drama is now using the letter as blackmail, asking B to apologize and come back to him.
I'm confused. I'm not sure what to believe, but oddly enough I still trust B's word. I want to help him out, not sure what to do though. What do you guys think? Should I just leave this all alone? Am I wrong to still consider B a friend? Am I being naive? I do feel responsible as the catalyst of this event though.
