Just a thought, but I like to say that I'm all about servicing someone else. I enjoy the fact that they are enjoying what I am doing. I guess all my life, I've been doing a lot of the giving, but receiving little in return. Maybe i should start being selfish?
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From Bottom to Top???
- Thread starter Madmen
- Start date
I tend to have a lot of trouble staying hard the first few times I'm with a guy. In fact, the guy I've been dating for 8 months now is the first guy I've actually managed to cum with when we're having sex, though it always takes a lot longer for me to climax. For me, it's just a matter of getting completely comfortable with the other guy. Practice makes perfect, it took several weeks of us having sex before I could cum in his presence, I guess I'm just wired that way. I just told him in the beginning that I usually don't come very quickly and made sure he knew that it wasn't a problem of me not being turned on by him. Like you, though, I really enjoy giving him pleasure, and if I don't climax everytime he does that isn't a problem to me.
You might still go see a doctor and see if he can give you some helpful tips or something. I get the feeling you're putting too much pressure on yourself by worrying you won't stay hard, just as thisisinteresting said. Sex shouldn't be about worrying, just have a great time with him, even if you don't cum or stay hard all the time. Good luck!
Just take the damn Viagra and stop over-anal-lysing it!
And stop beating yourself up because you don't get/keep hard during oral sex. A lot of guys care for oral sex because they can't feel it much.
It's all about pleasuring your partner, and communicating your likes and dislikes. If you don't like or care for getting your dick sucked, just tell him that! You can give him positive feedback, by telling him.... "you know what really gets me hot? You licking the back of my knees, kissing my abs, sucking my nuts, etc...." Just because you don't like one sexual act or one sexual position doesn't mean anything.
But if he would like you to top him once in a blue moon, just take the damn pill.
And stop beating yourself up because you don't get/keep hard during oral sex. A lot of guys care for oral sex because they can't feel it much.
It's all about pleasuring your partner, and communicating your likes and dislikes. If you don't like or care for getting your dick sucked, just tell him that! You can give him positive feedback, by telling him.... "you know what really gets me hot? You licking the back of my knees, kissing my abs, sucking my nuts, etc...." Just because you don't like one sexual act or one sexual position doesn't mean anything.
But if he would like you to top him once in a blue moon, just take the damn pill.
I'm getting the point - Thanks!
I have to get it in my head that what's on screen is a fantasy. I've been myself and had to pleasure myself for so long all those images go through my head when I'm in the intimate moment. The best thing I need to do is the regain my appetite and then see a doctor.
This guy has been so supportive. I sent a text regarding the matter and he sent this e-mail:
"Hey, chill on the "issue" thing, we don't have any issues yet.
I suspect the "issue" can be dealt with by giving Mark, and his relatively short attention span, a little more physical and verbal direction."
beyonder69 what things did you do to prepare/get yourself ready - if any?
I have to get it in my head that what's on screen is a fantasy. I've been myself and had to pleasure myself for so long all those images go through my head when I'm in the intimate moment. The best thing I need to do is the regain my appetite and then see a doctor.
This guy has been so supportive. I sent a text regarding the matter and he sent this e-mail:
"Hey, chill on the "issue" thing, we don't have any issues yet.
I suspect the "issue" can be dealt with by giving Mark, and his relatively short attention span, a little more physical and verbal direction.
"beyonder69 what things did you do to prepare/get yourself ready - if any?
Prepare in what way? You're probably overthinking everything, it's "just" sex 
Stop worrying about it, and it'll be far easier for you to stay hard and cum. And even if you don't, just enjoy the ride and maybe next time you will. No point in ruining the experience for you by worrying all the time. And I'm guessing your friend would agree, even if you don't stay hard all the time
Stop worrying about it, and it'll be far easier for you to stay hard and cum. And even if you don't, just enjoy the ride and maybe next time you will. No point in ruining the experience for you by worrying all the time. And I'm guessing your friend would agree, even if you don't stay hard all the time 
Blueboy369
JUB Addict
You are a great bottom and there is nothing wrong with that. There are plenty of total tops out there. If your friend wants to be pleasured anally you can use your mouth, fingers and toys. Sex is best when both partners are trying to 'get off'. Show him how you like to masterbate , place his hand exactly where you like it and enjoy. Jerk off together. when you are having sex just think about "Getting Off". You are one hell of a bottom, embrace it!
beyonder69 I WAS over thinking stuff the situation and then at some point during the day, something clicked and I all I felt was a little stupid. Preparing??? What was i thinking this morning?
I'm having fun... a lot of fun and I apologize if it appears that I boasting, but here's the deal: I'm little older than some of you, I'm asian (Filipino/Thai) so people have to have no or have to have a specialized interest in me and I'm balding which is a total strike out for most people. I haven't had sex in years!
I'm going forward with a go-with-the-flow kind of attitude with just a little passion sprinkled in.
Blueboy369 you're absolutely right, if I am a bottom why should I change? The bottom line is I need to chill and just have fun.
I'm having fun... a lot of fun and I apologize if it appears that I boasting, but here's the deal: I'm little older than some of you, I'm asian (Filipino/Thai) so people have to have no or have to have a specialized interest in me and I'm balding which is a total strike out for most people. I haven't had sex in years!
I'm going forward with a go-with-the-flow kind of attitude with just a little passion sprinkled in.
Blueboy369 you're absolutely right, if I am a bottom why should I change? The bottom line is I need to chill and just have fun.