The Original Gay Porn Community - Free Gay Movies and Photos, Gay Porn Site Reviews and Adult Gay Forums

  • Welcome To Just Us Boys - The World's Largest Gay Message Board Community

    In order to comply with recent US Supreme Court rulings regarding adult content, we will be making changes in the future to require that you log into your account to view adult content on the site.
    If you do not have an account, please register.
    REGISTER HERE - 100% FREE / We Will Never Sell Your Info

    PLEASE READ: To register, turn off your VPN (iPhone users- disable iCloud); you can re-enable the VPN after registration. You must maintain an active email address on your account: disposable email addresses cannot be used to register.

  • The Support & Advice forum is a no-flame zone.
    The members offering support and advice do so with the best intention. If you ask for advice, we don't require you to take the advice, but we do ask that you listen and give it consideration.

From walked all over to well respected and feared. [merged]

So i've been through the same thing and I used to eat it away. But 1 thing that keeps me going is knowing I will find my perfect man pretty soon. And u are unlucky since people don't show respect to people who are fat and gay I think bing gay is the most fantastic thing to exist since it gave me a purpose in life. You should search for joy and happiness in your life and never let anyone walk on you and well it's really mean to say but if you want a semi-closeted gay guy to come out for you you need to lose weight since they all don't got the guts to come out. I am still closeted too which is killing me but I will come out when I find my true match for me. I hope what I wrote was useful and keeP on dreaming don't turn away from what you wanted and always see life from the bright side. Greets Robbert
 
There is a huge difference between confidence and arrogance.

People respect confidence.

People despise arrogance.

You are arrogant. You can't demand respect. You must earn it. You haven't earned it but you demand it. That is why people dislike you. Nobody "deserves" respect. You seem to think you do and that is why you don't get any.


You refuse to take any advice from anyone here in order to help you... All you want is to whine and bitch and complain but nothing else. Since you don't see any problems with yourself and refuse to get the proper help you need, you will always. ALWAYS. feel this way and have an unending cycle where you will be lonely, depressed and bitter for the rest of your life.

So you can still choose. Get help and become someone who can be respected or continue being a bitter old queen and expect the same shit outta life.

Be a man and make a choice.
 
Glancing at the thread title again, it strikes me that it contains a contradiction that is destructive to the goals expressed. One can be well respected, one can be feared, but only one in a million can be both -- and they usually blow it anyway.


Here's a hint: the greatest respect is bestowed on those who care not at all if they get any.
 
Further responses to this thread simply feed the need of the OP. It makes no difference whether he is a deeply disturbed real person or a troll. There are other people posting to JUB whose problems are real and who will profit from your advice. But the OP is not one of them.

The cure for all this is to STOP TAKING THE BAIT BY RESPONDING IN ANY WAY.
 
NeedingHelpASAP, after contributing to many of your threads, I am beginning to think that I don't like you.

It would be pointless and cruel to say this if I thought that was my final opinion on the matter. In fact I still think the potential exists for me to like you, and it is in the hope of this occurring that I mention it at all.

Perhaps I am wrong, and even to doubt you for a minute is a sign of my own problems and not yours. But considering your experience with other people, I encourage you to have a discussion with someone like me about what is going wrong. Take me as an example of other people you've had problems with, except one who is willing to talk things out and get to a better place.

Let me tell you what I like and what I'm kind of choking on:
  • the fact that you ask for help: total positive.
  • the fact that you have self confidence in your appearance and call yourself handsome: total positive.
  • your drive and career aspirations: positive.
  • the fact that at least some people have made their best efforts to help you, even if they gave advice that doesn't work for you, but I can't remember you even thanking them once, or doing anything except brushing off their suggestions: highly negative.
  • the idea that prostitutes owe it to you to drop everything and everybody just for a chance to have you buy their time: highly arrogant and negative
  • the fear that you haven't even really tried any of the different ideas people have given you for getting help: negative
  • the fact that you see honesty as disrespect or humiliation: negative.

So in all honestly that's why I'm kind of leaning negative at the moment. There are too many things on that list that bother me compared to the positives. But I fully admit I could be wrong. So you have a choice: ignore me, slam me and blame me, or show some compassion and respectfully explain to me how I made a mistake, or even listen to some of these ideas and change your ways.

It is truly up to you.
 
^ Good post.

I'll chip in here -- I have two main problems at this point:

Often it seems as though you're more interested in the attention you get from whining

You come across as seeming so fragile you're afraid to actually try changing anything because you don't think you can hold yourself together when things get different.


Here's another tidbit for you, from someone who spent so long convicted that he was a blot on the universe that needed removing: you're afraid that if you work at changing, things will get out of control, and destroy you. Well, you're right -- things will get out of control, inevitably, because you're trying to change in short order what got built over years -- but you're wrong, because 'things' will not, can not, destroy you: only you can destroy you, and that, when you get down to it, is a choice you make alone.

Know that there are people here on the outside cheering for you.
 
Can't you people stop feeding the fire? Is there anything that can be said here that hasn't already been said in a dozen different ways?

The OP is a TROLL or SO FAR GONE that continuing this thread is a total waste of time and bandwidth. Let it die!
 
MrRochesterNY said:
Can't you people stop feeding the fire? Is there anything that can be said here that hasn't already been said in a dozen different ways?

The OP is a TROLL or SO FAR GONE that continuing this thread is a total waste of time and bandwidth. Let it die!
Click to expand...

People are really just coming here to look at your avatar. :p
 
Happy Holidays to all!!

OP I wish nothing but the best for you. Perhaps your New Years Rez could be to learn to like yourself just a little bit more. Life is worth living to the fullest. Good luck bro.
 
Okay, Its easy in your post the only thing I see is i want a BF and I want to get fucked.

This is really easy since most men are pigs

1. Look good

That's it

The best solution ever ^^

Okay so if u want some affection from a man u need to show off u need to meet people go to bars clubs pubs etc
And flirt with some guys dont go on the street and watch at someone cause straight guys are most of the time homophobic jerks.

And u need another attitude towards yourself you need to think that you are on this world for a reason. I've been depressed and the way I came out of my depression is because I thought i was here for a reason. The most motivating thought is that i will find a guy who loves me for who I am

I suggest to start a thread about weight loss cause I think its bothering you. And you need to open up to everyone get relations with people and eventually you find your dream
 
NeedingHelpASAP said:
I've been feeling really down as of late. I'm a 23 year old homosexual male who's been suffering from depression for a very long time now. I've been mistreated and belittled basically my entire life and have never received the amount of respect that i deserve. I always feel unattractive and victimized. I always feel upset and scared to even live my life sometimes because there's always been someone there to ruin my parade. I've been consistantly depressed for some time now... but recently my depression has reached new depths. I've been thinking about what my life would be like if maybe i just ended my life. If i'm never to be where i want to be in life, or if i can NEVER have what i really want in life, or be treated the way that i really want to be treated....and SHOULD be treated.....and respected the way that i SHOULD be respected. I feel like i don't know if i could go on like that and die in my elder years knowing that i never became what i so badly wanted and never had a good time here...
The things that I would normally do in an attempt to have a break from the turmoil aren't helping anymore.
For instance I won't lie...I personally have a thing for living a sexual lifestyle and enjoying myself sexually. But when i go out to events or places with people of a sexual nature (sex parties, bathhouses, sex clubs etc...) i often find myself leaving in tears (literally) because the guys there are so rude and mean to me. It makes me feel like they are able to take my happiness away even when i try to take part in an extracurricular activity that is an escape from the pain i endure on a daily basis. Which beats me up even more. Having whatever little joy i have taken away from me by others...I cant even have a place to escape. I'm homosexual....when i go to places for meet and greats with other gays and when the guys are so cold and distant it hurts....there's no unity within my own community.
I've had experiences before in the past where my own employees were snarky to me and acted as is they were the persons of power and not myself.

I hate feeling like guys don't like me. I've never been shown affection from a guy...no warmth.......i've never felt like anyone's ever liked me. I've never had a relationship before. I've never had any friends. My family isn't great. And I just feel alone and unwanted at all times. I've had sex before but even that seems EXTREMELY COLD and distant.

I hate feeling like all guys think i'm ugly and litterally go out of their way to give negative very off putting cruel reactions vs just giving a more decent response.

Even escorts, gogo boys, strippers, and sex industry guys have been mean to me not even greeting me at events and literally ostricizing me..... it hurts. Especially since those guys are paid workers and they still refuse to be decent towards me.

I've done nothing to anyone in my life.

I've spent the entire day crying...and have been depressed for years. I need help and I have no idea of what to do.
Click to expand...


You should realize a few things about yourself.

1/ Come to terms with the fact that you're ugly and socially awkward and few people want you

2/ Come to terms with the fact that you're too immersed in your own self-pity that nobody wants to come near you

Now after you have made those realizations, you should also start brainstorming a few things:

1/ Obviously you can't improve your physical appearance. So ask yourself how you can effectively improve your social skills. WORK HARD to improve your social skills

2/ How to STOP FEELING PITY FOR YOURSELF. DO SOMETHING TO GET OUT OF ALL THIS. LIFE IS SHORT, YOU HAVE TO RUN RIGHT NOW, RUN FAST, DEVELOP INTO A BETTER HUMAN BEING. Stop giving a fuck what people think about you and START PAYING ATTENTION TO WHAT YOU THINK ABOUT YOURSELF.
 
boredass123 said:
Obviously you can't improve your physical appearance. So ask yourself how you can effectively improve your social skills. WORK HARD to improve your social skills

2/ How to STOP FEELING PITY FOR YOURSELF. DO SOMETHING TO GET OUT OF ALL THIS. LIFE IS SHORT, YOU HAVE TO RUN RIGHT NOW, RUN FAST, DEVELOP INTO A BETTER HUMAN BEING. Stop giving a fuck what people think about you and START PAYING ATTENTION TO WHAT YOU THINK ABOUT YOURSELF.
Click to expand...

Quoted for truth. Very strong and appropriate advice.

I don't remember seeing a picture of the OP here anywhere - have you seen one? He may not even be ugly at all...I'm thinking just as likely he may be trying to deal with BDD (Body Dysmorphic Disorder), which is more common than I had thought. I invite him to look it up, and objectively think-out whether it may apply to his situation or not.

I came to realize a long time ago that being able to put an "official scientific label" on a phenomenon (which includes mental/physical issues) is an extremely helpful thing, and it is often one of the biggest initial steps. A very common example is that an alcoholic must first admit to his/herself that they indeed have that issue, otherwise a remedy or successful treatment is unlikely.

Though I've never seen this guy's picture, I have the feeling that if he were to post photos he'd end up with comments about his hotness, etc. as much as "the next guy."
 
Is this thread being kept open so that the Mods can feel like they're "good deed doers." (Credit Wizard of Oz.) There can be no other reason. Someone needs to lob a hand-grenade into it. (Do grenades make flames?)
 
Re:

palbert said:
Is this thread being kept open so that the Mods can feel like they're "good deed doers." (Credit Wizard of Oz.) There can be no other reason. Someone needs to lob a hand-grenade into it. (Do grenades make flames?)
Click to expand...

I think the OP has stopped visiting this thread. His last posting here was on December 20, and on December 21, he tried to start a similar "woe is me" thread on HOT TOPICS. But Corny, as Mod, closed that after the OP's one posting.
 
Wow!
You guys have so much patience,,,
I think, I will cry to get some attention.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top