Late last week, I started chatting with this guy online. We went on webcam and both wanted to meet each other ASAP. The only thing is, when we first started chatting, I asked him what he was looking for, and he said "friends and sex." And I said "not a relationship?" and he said "no" and I asked why, and his only explanation was, "my choice." I told him I'm down with that... which I am... but sometimes I fall for people and can't really control it. But I'm trying not to let his cautious attitude get to me: I recently hooked up with another guy recently and told him straight up that I don't want a relationship. I think what I mean when I say this to people is "I'm not actively LOOKING for a relationship, but I would not necessarily be opposed to one if that's what happened." I wonder if this is the same for other people who have their guard up.
But anyways, so Saturday night I went over to his house to meet, and I was kind of stunned the first second I laid eyes on him. He's so handsome it makes my head spin. I'm 22 and usually into guys younger than me so it was so awesome to finally meet a guy older than me that I found really attractive. He's 24, 6'2, athletic shape, dirty blonde hair. Really masculine, but has this soft side too. One of the things we talked about briefly was why he's not into the internet very much: he mentioned some internet drama happened with an ex and another ex so he decided not to go on websites like facebook anymore. What was interesting about that to me was that it was clear he'd been in long term relationships before, so it's not like he's one of those anti-relationship, anti-romance guys (they do exist).
So we hung out for an hour or so, talking, drinking some beer, and I felt really comfortable. I offered to give him a massage and we ended up having really hot sex. Really passionate, lots of kissing. It was around 1:00 AM and I had a party to go to, as he knew, so he gave me a ride and we even kissed before I got out.
I could tell I didn't feel like it was an ordinary hookup because of how I felt at the party. We texted a little bit that night.
Then the next day, he texts me again, asking what I'm up to, making small talk. Then he asks what I'm doing that night (Sunday). I tell him I might have plans with a friend but they might not come through. He tells me to tell him if I'm not up to anything, that he was cooking and rented a movie. I asked him if that was an invite and he said it was a "very good invite." So eventually I go over and this time we're both sober and it feels... exactly the same. We hang out for a bit, then watch a movie in his bed, cuddling, fooling around, holding hands. When the movie finished we had sex again... he had to get up early in the morning for work so I didn't want to stay the night because I'd keep him up, but he did offer. There is so much cute little stuff like, he laughs at all my jokes, when we were cuddling asked me if I'm ticklish, etc... we agreed I'd spend the night another time when I'm not on such a nocturnal schedule... joked about taking sleeping pills and how he could do whatever he wanted to me... haha.
I'm really trying to play it cool, so I've been letting him chase me a bit as I've made it really clear to him in person that I think he's extremely beautiful and I am obviously intrigued. I think it must be pretty obvious that I like him, as I can tell how I act during a normal hookup and I'm not nearly that affectionate or starry eyed. He messaged me yesterday too, just to say goodnight it seemed like. I know it's only been a few days but the thing is, I don't want to get my hopes up because of what he said in the beginning, and I'm just trying to really assess if when someone says that, if it's the only thing that matters... I say that to guys all the time and I know it's more of a defense mechanism than the truth. But that's just me. I really like being single and the independence that comes with it, and how confident I feel, so I don't want to get swept up in something false, but I like to think I know romance when I see it, but his initial words make me nervous. What do you guys think? Any advice? Thanks.
But anyways, so Saturday night I went over to his house to meet, and I was kind of stunned the first second I laid eyes on him. He's so handsome it makes my head spin. I'm 22 and usually into guys younger than me so it was so awesome to finally meet a guy older than me that I found really attractive. He's 24, 6'2, athletic shape, dirty blonde hair. Really masculine, but has this soft side too. One of the things we talked about briefly was why he's not into the internet very much: he mentioned some internet drama happened with an ex and another ex so he decided not to go on websites like facebook anymore. What was interesting about that to me was that it was clear he'd been in long term relationships before, so it's not like he's one of those anti-relationship, anti-romance guys (they do exist).
So we hung out for an hour or so, talking, drinking some beer, and I felt really comfortable. I offered to give him a massage and we ended up having really hot sex. Really passionate, lots of kissing. It was around 1:00 AM and I had a party to go to, as he knew, so he gave me a ride and we even kissed before I got out.
I could tell I didn't feel like it was an ordinary hookup because of how I felt at the party. We texted a little bit that night.
Then the next day, he texts me again, asking what I'm up to, making small talk. Then he asks what I'm doing that night (Sunday). I tell him I might have plans with a friend but they might not come through. He tells me to tell him if I'm not up to anything, that he was cooking and rented a movie. I asked him if that was an invite and he said it was a "very good invite." So eventually I go over and this time we're both sober and it feels... exactly the same. We hang out for a bit, then watch a movie in his bed, cuddling, fooling around, holding hands. When the movie finished we had sex again... he had to get up early in the morning for work so I didn't want to stay the night because I'd keep him up, but he did offer. There is so much cute little stuff like, he laughs at all my jokes, when we were cuddling asked me if I'm ticklish, etc... we agreed I'd spend the night another time when I'm not on such a nocturnal schedule... joked about taking sleeping pills and how he could do whatever he wanted to me... haha.
I'm really trying to play it cool, so I've been letting him chase me a bit as I've made it really clear to him in person that I think he's extremely beautiful and I am obviously intrigued. I think it must be pretty obvious that I like him, as I can tell how I act during a normal hookup and I'm not nearly that affectionate or starry eyed. He messaged me yesterday too, just to say goodnight it seemed like. I know it's only been a few days but the thing is, I don't want to get my hopes up because of what he said in the beginning, and I'm just trying to really assess if when someone says that, if it's the only thing that matters... I say that to guys all the time and I know it's more of a defense mechanism than the truth. But that's just me. I really like being single and the independence that comes with it, and how confident I feel, so I don't want to get swept up in something false, but I like to think I know romance when I see it, but his initial words make me nervous. What do you guys think? Any advice? Thanks.
What do you hope to get in a "boyfriend"? Sex and friendship. Well, that's what both of you want...and still get to see other people.
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