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Funniest thing someone said when you came out.

L

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It's been a while since I've seen one of these threads and there's been enough new people come out that I figured a new one is warranted.

What was something funny someone said to you when they found out you were gay?

When I came out to my dad he said "Well no shit." Apparently he was not surprised by my revelation.
 
The funniest response I've gotten thus far came from the fourth person I told. Her response was a blank stare for a second and then she went "You're not gay."

It took a few minutes for it to sink in for her, but to top off her already hilarious reaction, she cited an incident relating to her ex-boyfriend from a month or so before that. Her ex is bisexual and after he broke up with her, he tried to get chatty with me on Facebook, so my friend joked (before she knew I was gay) that I took her boyfriend from her.

Her final reaction was, "You really did steal (ex's name) from me you son of a bitch!"

Then we laughed our asses off and she gave me a hug.

A close runner up is the third person I told, who when I told him thought I was kidding then forgot about it for a few days.
 
I came out on msn to a straight male friend. I told him that I have been dating with somebody who is really cool. He asked "what is her name?" answer: "Charles" reaction: "Fuck you, Andy. Fuck you."

We remained friends.
 
One of my best female friends asked, "You just now figured that out?"
 
My Mom: "If you like to buttfuck, why can't you do it with a woman?" :eek:
 
All mine have been oddly funny. The last one, we were at a fast food, and this girlfriend of mine was depressed because her BF was fucking with her brain, so my two other girlfriends were using signs to tell me "TELL HER YOU'RE GAY!" I obviously said no.... she heard me and said "What, what is it?" "Come on! Tell her... she deserves to know..." "No! I decide that, not you" And we eventually built up enough momentum for her to scream "TELL ME WTF IS GOING ON BEFORE I THROW MY COFFEE ON YOU!". She was definitely going to.... The whole restaurant stared at us and I went ahead and said "I'm gay..."

She started laughing and said "Nice try!" I gave her a blank stare "OMG! But like, are you sure? How do you know? Tell me more tell me more!" She eventually said "Wow... so you like salami up your dumper huh?.... we have something in common! Yay!" She had a crush on me a while back....
 
I told my good friend, and he was really cool with it. I was going to tell his long-time girlfriend, and he said, "Oooh, let me be there when you tell her. Because I know PRECISELY what she'll say."

"What?"

"Her eyes will get big, and she'll say 'Really?!' like she would've never thought that could ever happen. And THEN, maybe five seconds later, she'll sort of nod and say 'Well, yeah, that makes sense'."

He may as well have scripted it. That ended up being PRECISELY what she did. :)

Lex
 
I "came out" a little later in life than you guys. The first thing out of the mouth of my best friend of 20 years (we were in the Army together) was, "Have you talked to a shrink about this yet?"
 
My Dad: Okay, pass the potatoes
 
Since i only have one so far, she said:

"I've known since kindergarten"
 
Mine is with my friend Jeremy. I was chatting with him over MSN and I told him I was bi. He asked me with I was sure and I told him I was. I asked him if he cared and he told me "fuck no dude, I wouldn't care if you were as queer as a two dollar bill."
 
I was joking around with a guy at work and he says to me, "if we were not both straight I would totally marry you." I looked back at him and said "you know I am gay, right?"---He laughed and said "then lets run off to Connecticut."
 
fjancsi80 said:
I came out on msn to a straight male friend. I told him that I have been dating with somebody who is really cool. He asked "what is her name?" answer: "Charles" reaction: "Fuck you, Andy. Fuck you."

We remained friends.
Click to expand...
Wow, I told my best friend on AIM and he said the EXACT same thing, haha. He couldn't tell if I was joking or not.

But eventually he knew I was telling the truth and we talked about it in person and he and I are still best friends to this day.

When I told my cousin, he said, "So all this time, when we were talking about girls, you were just blowing smoke up my ass?" He's cool with it, too. ;)
 
When I told my (gay) roommate--"And here I thought my gaydar was broken again".
 
One drunken night I told a couple of my friends that I was gay (I was already out of the closet to some of them), one of my straight friends said "Bullshit. If you were really gay, you'd suck my dick right now." I found it pretty funny, because the dude is kind of a creep when it comes to chicks... and apparently with dudes too!

Uhh, let's see... when I came out to my parents during an argument my dad chuckled and I said "i'm no typical faggot, I'll knock you the fuck out", and his only reply was "that wouldn't be good"... then tried to tell me that he didn't believe me and that I was only going against the norm because I've always been rather counter culture. To which I replied, "oh yeah, one day I just woke up and decided that I liked dick, because society says that's weird" or something like that, I don't remember my exact phrasing.
 
Actually quite recently I was working and two regulars come up to me a woman and a man.

Woman: C'mon Chris I think I can turn you *tries to stick her tongue down my throat*
Me: I don't need turning!
Man: Yeah leave him alone, hes not gay
Me: well I'm bi if that helps
Man: Wow, good for you for coming out of the closet, I thought there was something about you.
Me: I've been out for a while....
Man: what ever, but good for you.

It wasn't so much funny as a WHAT THE FUCK! moment.
 
I have several. The second person I told, one of my best friends to this day, was walking to class with me when I had a break-down moment and told her that "on top of everything else...I'm bi!" (at the time I thought I was bi, but after coming out more I admitted I was just gay). I looked up and realized she was no longer walking next to me but had stopped and was staring at me, wide-eyed, mouth hanging open and screamed "NO! REALLY?" After a while she screamed "I STILL LOVE YOU!" and then 2 seconds later screamed "damnit, I defended your sexuality to so many people!" Yeah, it wasn't a big secret.

My second favorite was when I told a friend right before seeing a movie and she said "Yes!" and made a funny little gesture to show how happy she was. The girl above^^ started laughing and asked her if she knew already, to which Amanda replied "well, duh. I mean, I knew there was a reason why me and him talked non-stop about america's next top model and he loved to go shopping with us."
 
well, mine just happened 2 nights ago. I was chatting with my close friend who is a Muslim but very open-minded and a typical straight guy that talks about girls all the time. So i'm not really sure how he would react when i do tell him. Here's our conversation:

Me: I need to tell you something.
Him: What is it?
Me: I'm gay
Him: You have gay frens? No big deal. I got quite a few gay and lesbian frens too.
Me: (0.o) what?? Nonono. I mean i'm gay
Him: Hahahaha sorry i read your msg wrongly.
Me: It's ok
Him: Hmm... why do gay can always attract girls more compare to normal straight guys.

He also mentioned to me that one of his ex-gf ended up being a lesbian.

He's the first one to say these funny replies. A few of my friends just gave me the normal replies, i.e. no kidding. u sure, how u know, when u know, does ur parents know?

:D
 
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