Gay dating sites or apps…

[firsttimeagain]

Just curious of other’s experience with gay dating sites or apps. I am still only curious and would like to change my status to experienced. Not looking for just a hookup, I really want more than that. Friendship, dating, relationship and of course safe sex. I am simply clueless how to find likeminded guys. I’m not interested in coming out to the world, just meeting and finding someone that is interested in getting to know each other for a possible partner to take it slow…no horn dogs of weirdo’s.

 

[FitzTwombly]

I haven't had a lot of luck with casual or friendships/dating personally, although I could try harder (tendency to reply after long delays). I've used Grindr, Sniffies, and bumble (used friend finder, had no luck).

 

[TotallyLostatLife]

Grindr is for quick, forgiven hook-ups, you hit with somebody, talk some bit, share some pictures and if one of you had a place to fuck, the thing is done.

Most of gay apps are like that (Gaydar, Planet Romeo, Scruff, Growlr, Hornet) it depends on what you are looking, some apps are only for specific categories (like Growlr, where is for Chubs, Bears and Chasers mainly)

If you want friends or try a more serious approach into dating, try Facebook Dating, Tinder or even Badoo.
You can even try Grindr with the proper description if you want friendship, but remember, most guys are just looking for a quick round.

 

[BiBtm64]

Just curious of other’s experience with gay dating sites or apps. I am still only curious and would like to change my status to experienced. Not looking for just a hookup, I really want more than that. Friendship, dating, relationship and of course safe sex. I am simply clueless how to find likeminded guys. I’m not interested in coming out to the world, just meeting and finding someone that is interested in getting to know each other for a possible partner to take it slow…no horn dogs of weirdo’s.

I've had experience of the website squirt dot org, which is geared very much toward hookups. There are lots of men in relationships looking to go behind their partners' backs, including guys married to women. I have seen guys on there looking for friends and more in-depth relationships and I made some good friends (with benefits / fuck buddies).

It allows people to search by neighbourhood or distance away, and you can specify preferences including safe sex in your profile. You would need to pay to use it to get anything from it, as the free version is so restricted that it's almost impossible to arrange to meet anyone.

It's probably not suitable for what you're looking for and I only mention it in case it comes up or you hear of it. As previous posters have suggested, these types of sites and apps are more geared toward quick casual sex, and you might do better with a more serious dating site.

 

[mywifewilllovebbcqueen]

I just don’t want to be caught on a gay dating site because I’d rather get my cheeks clapped on video instead

 

[TX-Beau]

I just don’t want to be caught on a gay dating site because I’d rather get my cheeks clapped on video instead

Anyone "catching you" on a gay dating site is also being "caught" on a gay dating site. I don't understand the next part of that.

 

[firsttimeagain]

I've had experience of the website squirt dot org, which is geared very much toward hookups. There are lots of men in relationships looking to go behind their partners' backs, including guys married to women. I have seen guys on there looking for friends and more in-depth relationships and I made some good friends (with benefits / fuck buddies).

It allows people to search by neighbourhood or distance away, and you can specify preferences including safe sex in your profile. You would need to pay to use it to get anything from it, as the free version is so restricted that it's almost impossible to arrange to meet anyone.

It's probably not suitable for what you're looking for and I only mention it in case it comes up or you hear of it. As previous posters have suggested, these types of sites and apps are more geared toward quick casual sex, and you might do better with a more serious dating site.

Thanks for your reply and sorry it has taken me so long to reply back. Yea the hookup route seems too risky in today’s world for me. And I know I want more. Once would never be enough and I know that. Once would be a good start, but hopefully once would be a start to more intimacy. Probably to spend time together to get to know someone without expectations and building a friendship in which you both know the deeper expectations to share intimately is the goal. To build trust is important for something lasting. I know it’s a long shot to think in those terms. But, as much as I want the sex, it would be special to be able to get to know each other to be able and willing to truly satisfy each others needs and desires.

So, I have joined a couple of prominent sites. The first one, no matter how you set the filters, lots of females still slip through to visit your profile. That makes me nervous because I’m not interested in letting everyone know I’m interested in like minded men. I only want to let potential males know what I’m interested in. The other site/app seems more exclusive and I like that because I can communicate openly. Its drawback is the guys are generally older than I’m interested in. Even after setting an age range.

Maybe I need to give it more time. I met one guy that I got together with to talk in a public place. He was cool but apparently not interested in me though it went really well. I think not having any experience turned him away.

I know I’m asking for a lot to start with. But, I know what I want more now than ever. Casual sex scars me. I can’t wait to get over that hump. I wish it could be easy and find a mutual jack off partner to explore with. Who knows? That would lead to other things maybe quicker than it should.

If you have any other ideas of sites please let me know. Thanks again…

 

[TX-Beau]

Strong emotional connections develop over years, not days. You also need the other guy to want more from you than getting off. Not that there is anything wrong with getting off. If that's truly what you're after, find people of like interest in places they go, outside of a pixel that is dating/sex related.

Of all the stable couples I know, none of them met on a website. Sure, sometimes that happens, but your chances are higher without guessing who you're dealing with, the possibility f being catfished, fake ages and professions, and all the baggage that comes with trying to find intimacy in an anonymous arena. Go volunteer for something, assholes generally self-select themselves out of helping other people.

Websites are not the only option for meeting people.

 

[firsttimeagain]

Strong emotional connections develop over years, not days. You also need the other guy to want more from you than getting off. Not that there is anything wrong with getting off. If that's truly what you're after, find people of like interest in places they go, outside of a pixel that is dating/sex related.

Of all the stable couples I know, none of them met on a website. Sure, sometimes that happens, but your chances are higher without guessing who you're dealing with, the possibility f being catfished, fake ages and professions, and all the baggage that comes with trying to find intimacy in an anonymous arena. Go volunteer for something, assholes generally self-select themselves out of helping other people.

Websites are not the only option for meeting people.

Yea you are probably right. Wishful thinking on my part. I’ve just never had any luck in my everyday life. Of course I’ve pretty much been in the closet forever. It’s a crazy dilemma because I’m finally ready to open up and be what I’ve always truly wanted to be. I’ll never be totally out flaunting it in public, But, with the right guy I’m going to be so dedicated to pleasing on every level. I never want anything other than being the best gay lover and partner that I can be. I should have been years ago. But, I am here now…

 

[BiBtm64]

Thanks for your reply and sorry it has taken me so long to reply back. Yea the hookup route seems too risky in today’s world for me. And I know I want more. Once would never be enough and I know that. Once would be a good start, but hopefully once would be a start to more intimacy. Probably to spend time together to get to know someone without expectations and building a friendship in which you both know the deeper expectations to share intimately is the goal. To build trust is important for something lasting. I know it’s a long shot to think in those terms. But, as much as I want the sex, it would be special to be able to get to know each other to be able and willing to truly satisfy each others needs and desires.

So, I have joined a couple of prominent sites. The first one, no matter how you set the filters, lots of females still slip through to visit your profile. That makes me nervous because I’m not interested in letting everyone know I’m interested in like minded men. I only want to let potential males know what I’m interested in. The other site/app seems more exclusive and I like that because I can communicate openly. Its drawback is the guys are generally older than I’m interested in. Even after setting an age range.

Maybe I need to give it more time. I met one guy that I got together with to talk in a public place. He was cool but apparently not interested in me though it went really well. I think not having any experience turned him away.

I know I’m asking for a lot to start with. But, I know what I want more now than ever. Casual sex scars me. I can’t wait to get over that hump. I wish it could be easy and find a mutual jack off partner to explore with. Who knows? That would lead to other things maybe quicker than it should.

If you have any other ideas of sites please let me know. Thanks again…

There's no need to apologise for taking time to answer, buddy. It's great that you took a first step in meeting a guy and you can mark it down to experience. A thing about dating apps/sites is that they're oriented toward sex, and they attract people who want to get together for sex. You can make it clear in your profile that you're looking for friends with a view to a longer-term relationship, and try to use it in that way. It would take time, firstly to find a guy who's looking for the same, and is compatible, and to develop a connection. A problem with meeting someone in person that you found online is that you need to filter out all the bullshit artists. You go from meeting a complete stranger, trying to get to know them, and all the time you're both asking yourselves will this be the guy that I'm going to have sex with. I can imagine that it would be a long stretch and a remote possibility to go from arranging a first date online to forming a long-term relationship. You need to give it time. It's not going to happen quickly or easily, if at all.

One thing to consider is whether your approach and your nerves make you come across as needy or desperate. I'm not suggesting you are, I'm just saying to consider this. Try to relax, make friends, see where it goes. Be clear that you're seeking a relationship, and you're not meeting for casual sex, but don't make it seem like a job interview for that dream job. Think of yourself as having a lot to offer, and that he'd be lucky to connect with you. You don't have to say this or come across as arrogant or full of yourself, but think of yourself this way and it may help you to relax. There's no need to talk about lack of experience on a first date. Did you ever date a girl and start out talking about whether she's a virgin or how many partners she has had? There's no need to go there with a guy. Just let it develop.

Another thing to ask yourself is why casual sex scares you. Casual sex would be a way to gain confidence and to explore and learn what you enjoy, and how to give pleasure to another guy. You can start out with light stuff like mutual jerk-off and see what you feel like getting into. If it scares you because of safety concerns, you can easily meet a guy and use your instinct to judge him and whether you think he can be trusted to stick within your boundaries. Any guy who has casual sex has to take this chance and make this judgement about the other guy. A potential casual sex partner will be thinking the same about you. I can say from experience that while many guys will want to do things that I wasn't prepared to do, such as unprotected anal, when I politely declined it was politely accepted and we'd go on our separate ways. You can be safe by using your instinct and stating and sticking to your limits.

Maybe also ask yourself what you're looking for online, and whether you're making it clear in your profile and when chatting online. Are you looking for a relationship or a jerk-off buddy? Someone who is willing to have casual sex is unlikely to be the right person to develop a long-term connection with. Be honest with yourself, and then you can be honest with others.

Also, you might consider broadening your options. Don't only look online. Join local community groups or take part in hobbies to make friends. The people who are most attractive to potential partners are those that have lots of friends and are easy-going and fun to be around. How will gay guys know you're looking for a same-sex relationship? It's up to you when or if you come out, but if you keep your feelings entirely to yourself, nobody will know the real you.

 

[firsttimeagain]

There's no need to apologise for taking time to answer, buddy. It's great that you took a first step in meeting a guy and you can mark it down to experience. A thing about dating apps/sites is that they're oriented toward sex, and they attract people who want to get together for sex. You can make it clear in your profile that you're looking for friends with a view to a longer-term relationship, and try to use it in that way. It would take time, firstly to find a guy who's looking for the same, and is compatible, and to develop a connection. A problem with meeting someone in person that you found online is that you need to filter out all the bullshit artists. You go from meeting a complete stranger, trying to get to know them, and all the time you're both asking yourselves will this be the guy that I'm going to have sex with. I can imagine that it would be a long stretch and a remote possibility to go from arranging a first date online to forming a long-term relationship. You need to give it time. It's not going to happen quickly or easily, if at all.

One thing to consider is whether your approach and your nerves make you come across as needy or desperate. I'm not suggesting you are, I'm just saying to consider this. Try to relax, make friends, see where it goes. Be clear that you're seeking a relationship, and you're not meeting for casual sex, but don't make it seem like a job interview for that dream job. Think of yourself as having a lot to offer, and that he'd be lucky to connect with you. You don't have to say this or come across as arrogant or full of yourself, but think of yourself this way and it may help you to relax. There's no need to talk about lack of experience on a first date. Did you ever date a girl and start out talking about whether she's a virgin or how many partners she has had? There's no need to go there with a guy. Just let it develop.

Another thing to ask yourself is why casual sex scares you. Casual sex would be a way to gain confidence and to explore and learn what you enjoy, and how to give pleasure to another guy. You can start out with light stuff like mutual jerk-off and see what you feel like getting into. If it scares you because of safety concerns, you can easily meet a guy and use your instinct to judge him and whether you think he can be trusted to stick within your boundaries. Any guy who has casual sex has to take this chance and make this judgement about the other guy. A potential casual sex partner will be thinking the same about you. I can say from experience that while many guys will want to do things that I wasn't prepared to do, such as unprotected anal, when I politely declined it was politely accepted and we'd go on our separate ways. You can be safe by using your instinct and stating and sticking to your limits.

Maybe also ask yourself what you're looking for online, and whether you're making it clear in your profile and when chatting online. Are you looking for a relationship or a jerk-off buddy? Someone who is willing to have casual sex is unlikely to be the right person to develop a long-term connection with. Be honest with yourself, and then you can be honest with others.

Also, you might consider broadening your options. Don't only look online. Join local community groups or take part in hobbies to make friends. The people who are most attractive to potential partners are those that have lots of friends and are easy-going and fun to be around. How will gay guys know you're looking for a same-sex relationship? It's up to you when or if you come out, but if you keep your feelings entirely to yourself, nobody will know the real you.

Wow. Thank you so much for your thorough thoughts and insight. I might be back to square one a some level, but you sure give me a lot to think about. I have made a little progress getting together with the one guy I met on the app. But, it was obviously not meant to be as he was very experienced in a long relationship living with a guy for many years. I’m sure he knew I was nervous and inexperienced and he was not willing to even consider getting together again. I know it will take awhile to develop a relationship that is trusting and worth of a long term commitment. On one hand I’m so ready for that to happen. I know I want more than just a hook up and casual sex. On the other hand I guess I wish I would have had the casual sex when I was younger to at least have that experience under my belt.

Now casual sex scares me because if they are open to casual sex with me then they are open with others and that’s not healthy. Hence the reason I prefer someone I can trust to be monogamous. That’s asking a lot and yes it takes time to develop a trusting relationship with someone.

I’ve made some progress in my mind. But, I’m light years away from where I imagine wanting to be. I’ll keep working through it. I need to broaden my opinions, so I will have the wheels turning of how to get involved and meeting other people. I’m not going to find that just looking on the web.

I’m not ready to come out to the world, but if I met someone I’m interested in…trust me, I will let them know I’m interested. I guess that mind set is progress too. I’ve always been scared to open up and I know I had a missed opportunity years ago at my gym because I was scared he didn’t feel the same. Probably the only guy I’ve ever met that I truly knew I wanted. He was very attractive and a cool guy. Of course seeing him in an open shower a couple of times a week drove me crazy. He was a good looking guy with a similar physique as I and a beautiful cock that I could not stop looking at. Lol. Though I’ve always known I was gay from an early age, being around him just confirmed to me that it was not just some passing fantasy. The attraction and the way it made me feel was really eye opening. From that point on it’s all I can think about and it’s all I want.

Thanks again for your time I appreciate it. I will get there probably when I least expect it. But, I know now that I will not let an opportunity pass me by without at least letting my feelings out. I may strike out, but I’m confident in who I am now and I will let that be known. Eventually, I will find that opportunity and I look very forward to it…

 

[Alex Rose]

I've had experience of the website squirt dot org, which is geared very much toward hookups. There are lots of men in relationships looking to go behind their partners' backs, including guys married to women. I have seen guys on there looking for friends and more in-depth relationships and I made some good friends (with benefits / fuck buddies).

It allows people to search by neighbourhood or distance away, and you can specify preferences including safe sex in your profile. You would need to pay to use it to get anything from it, as the free version is so restricted that it's almost impossible to arrange to meet anyone.

It's probably not suitable for what you're looking for and I only mention it in case it comes up or you hear of it. As previous posters have suggested, these types of sites and apps are more geared toward quick casual sex, and you might do better with a more serious dating site.

I tried squirt, it was all right but not worth paying for. There weren't enough guys in more area and I live close to a major city. To me no dating app is worth your money. They are so overpriced and only care about one thing keeping you single and on there apps.

Sniffies is very similar and free. It also gives you a free trial of there premium version. I chatted with more guys then actually met irl. And my opinion you can give a try to see if you can find a fwb it worked for me and on other similar sites. I met normal guys never had bad experiences, but keep in my that this site is designed for guys w/ kinks, fetishes and are very horny. I'd say only one guy I met recently that was too much for me.

I honestly deleted my acct and am trying my best to stay off those apps cause they could be addictive

 

[firsttimeagain]

Thanks for all of the input. With my little bit of looking at apps and sites it’s probably not going to be a fruitful way to find what I’m looking for. Money wasted and not much to take away from it. Looking for respectful normal likeminded guys on those platforms looks like Russian roulette so far. I know it will take time, but hopefully I’ll find my way one way or another…

 

[magicdick]

Thanks for all of the input. With my little bit of looking at apps and sites it’s probably not going to be a fruitful way to find what I’m looking for. Money wasted and not much to take away from it. Looking for respectful normal likeminded guys on those platforms looks like Russian roulette so far. I know it will take time, but hopefully I’ll find my way one way or another…

Good decision. All the apps and sites I even used were endless money holes run by charlatans.

 

[BiBtm64]

Thanks for all of the input. With my little bit of looking at apps and sites it’s probably not going to be a fruitful way to find what I’m looking for. Money wasted and not much to take away from it. Looking for respectful normal likeminded guys on those platforms looks like Russian roulette so far. I know it will take time, but hopefully I’ll find my way one way or another…

I have to say I'm not surprised. Apps and sites in my experience have been a lot of guys just looking to meet, fuck and leave, and guys who have no intention of doing anything. More recently, they're a lot of guys who want to meet, fuck without any protection with a complete stranger, and leave. They're not for me either.

I guess you had to try and find out, but I do think you're better spending your time finding what you seek in real life. Good luck.

 

[CochondeMontreal]

So I just got ghosted, that's what the apps really amount to in my experience. Not even for a hook up. I think most guys are just jerking off while chatting with you and they nut and they ghost. Best case scenario. Then there's the part where I actually think most guys on the apps are pic collectors looking for free DIY porn.

I was talking with this guy about a week ago. Had not shared my private album at this point, just my public one. He had what seemed like a friendly chat. He was visiting the city, wanted to know where was what. It was long responses, which is not necessarily a bad thing for me, we all have lives outside Grindr. And sometimes trying to keep a conversation with one person on Grindr can be difficult and annoying cuz other people or bots or spam are messaging you when you want to focus on the one person. Anyway, last night our talk finally got spicy. We started sharing pics, nudes, etc. and we agreed to meet today at 3:00 P.M. it's currently 1:00 P.M. he wanted more pics last night, but I was pretty tired and just wanted to sleep, besides, we'd be meeting today, right? I woke up today, had my coffee, etc. I messaged the guy at 11:00 A.M. and said: Hey, we still on for 3? I'm gonna do a bit of tidying up, here's my number.

I went to check Grindr just some minutes ago, and his message is gone. He blocked me. Went to check my albums to see who it's being shared with; no one. So, he's gone.

That's Grindr man. Squirt, I never get any hits on. Gay411 just endless chat that goes nowhere... Scruff I was never to use properly, seems to want money in order to actually use.

As for friends. Personally, I'm not on the apps for friendship. Primarily I'm here for sex and hopefully make it regular and perhaps into a relationship. But these days, it seems to me that no one is serious. I honestly think that it's because guys are just jerking off and collecting pics. The guy last night got my address, phone number and pics. Granted the pics are in the private album and can't be screencapped, but clearly he wasn't actually looking for anything serious. I find also that when guys say: looking for something deeper and conversation, generally these guys can't come up with anything other than monosyllabic words, like 'hey' 'yeah' 'no'.

 

[magicdick]

So I just got ghosted, that's what the apps really amount to in my experience. Not even for a hook up. I think most guys are just jerking off while chatting with you and they nut and they ghost. Best case scenario. Then there's the part where I actually think most guys on the apps are pic collectors looking for free DIY porn.

I was talking with this guy about a week ago. Had not shared my private album at this point, just my public one. He had what seemed like a friendly chat. He was visiting the city, wanted to know where was what. It was long responses, which is not necessarily a bad thing for me, we all have lives outside Grindr. And sometimes trying to keep a conversation with one person on Grindr can be difficult and annoying cuz other people or bots or spam are messaging you when you want to focus on the one person. Anyway, last night our talk finally got spicy. We started sharing pics, nudes, etc. and we agreed to meet today at 3:00 P.M. it's currently 1:00 P.M. he wanted more pics last night, but I was pretty tired and just wanted to sleep, besides, we'd be meeting today, right? I woke up today, had my coffee, etc. I messaged the guy at 11:00 A.M. and said: Hey, we still on for 3? I'm gonna do a bit of tidying up, here's my number.

I went to check Grindr just some minutes ago, and his message is gone. He blocked me. Went to check my albums to see who it's being shared with; no one. So, he's gone.

That's Grindr man. Squirt, I never get any hits on. Gay411 just endless chat that goes nowhere... Scruff I was never to use properly, seems to want money in order to actually use.

As for friends. Personally, I'm not on the apps for friendship. Primarily I'm here for sex and hopefully make it regular and perhaps into a relationship. But these days, it seems to me that no one is serious. I honestly think that it's because guys are just jerking off and collecting pics. The guy last night got my address, phone number and pics. Granted the pics are in the private album and can't be screencapped, but clearly he wasn't actually looking for anything serious. I find also that when guys say: looking for something deeper and conversation, generally these guys can't come up with anything other than monosyllabic words, like 'hey' 'yeah' 'no'.

I’ve tried sevral apps and they all sucked for the reasons you mention. Even on JUB I’ve encountered guys who looking for nothing more than titillating pix and narratives. Having said that, JUB is, by far, the best website for finding and sincerely conversing and interacting with guys of like mind. I love JUB, have even found a lover local to me. I’m going to suck his nice very cock and he’s going to fuck me this Tuesday (17 September).

My sole goal is sex. Sucking cock for a mouth full of cum or a face covering facial.

Monosyllabists do abound. Ignore them. And I’ve had my share of no-shows.

I long for the good ol’ days of Craigslist personals. I sucked and got laid more times than I can count. Slurped cum by the gallon. I still mange to occasionally slip a “coded” personal by the CL censors. It’s tough these days hooking up. But it is so worth the effort for us dedicated cocksuckers and fuckees.

Good luck, baby.

 

[BiBtm64]

So I just got ghosted, that's what the apps really amount to in my experience. Not even for a hook up. I think most guys are just jerking off while chatting with you and they nut and they ghost. Best case scenario. Then there's the part where I actually think most guys on the apps are pic collectors looking for free DIY porn.

I was talking with this guy about a week ago. Had not shared my private album at this point, just my public one. He had what seemed like a friendly chat. He was visiting the city, wanted to know where was what. It was long responses, which is not necessarily a bad thing for me, we all have lives outside Grindr. And sometimes trying to keep a conversation with one person on Grindr can be difficult and annoying cuz other people or bots or spam are messaging you when you want to focus on the one person. Anyway, last night our talk finally got spicy. We started sharing pics, nudes, etc. and we agreed to meet today at 3:00 P.M. it's currently 1:00 P.M. he wanted more pics last night, but I was pretty tired and just wanted to sleep, besides, we'd be meeting today, right? I woke up today, had my coffee, etc. I messaged the guy at 11:00 A.M. and said: Hey, we still on for 3? I'm gonna do a bit of tidying up, here's my number.

I went to check Grindr just some minutes ago, and his message is gone. He blocked me. Went to check my albums to see who it's being shared with; no one. So, he's gone.

That's Grindr man. Squirt, I never get any hits on. Gay411 just endless chat that goes nowhere... Scruff I was never to use properly, seems to want money in order to actually use.

As for friends. Personally, I'm not on the apps for friendship. Primarily I'm here for sex and hopefully make it regular and perhaps into a relationship. But these days, it seems to me that no one is serious. I honestly think that it's because guys are just jerking off and collecting pics. The guy last night got my address, phone number and pics. Granted the pics are in the private album and can't be screencapped, but clearly he wasn't actually looking for anything serious. I find also that when guys say: looking for something deeper and conversation, generally these guys can't come up with anything other than monosyllabic words, like 'hey' 'yeah' 'no'.

I've had so many no-shows too. Like you say, I think many guys have no intention of meeting. My experience of Squirt was that it's run as a business, and they're more than happy to have people paying them to collect pictures or to jerk people around. I left the site after I outed a guy for being a habitual no-shower (others had said the same thing about him), and it was taken down. They're not there to facilitate guys getting together.

I also found the level of human intelligence on there made me despair for the future of the human race. Guys who couldn't read a profile about location options and safe sex, and act surprised. Like you I'm primarily after sex not deep and meaningful conversations, but I prefer some basic level of sentience.

I would have expected, with a body like yours in your profile, you'd get lots of attention. It's not you, it's them. Most of them are tyre-kickers. Good luck buddy.

 

[CochondeMontreal]

I've had so many no-shows too. Like you say, I think many guys have no intention of meeting. My experience of Squirt was that it's run as a business, and they're more than happy to have people paying them to collect pictures or to jerk people around. I left the site after I outed a guy for being a habitual no-shower (others had said the same thing about him), and it was taken down. They're not there to facilitate guys getting together.

I also found the level of human intelligence on there made me despair for the future of the human race. Guys who couldn't read a profile about location options and safe sex, and act surprised. Like you I'm primarily after sex not deep and meaningful conversations, but I prefer some basic level of sentience.

I would have expected, with a body like yours in your profile, you'd get lots of attention. It's not you, it's them. Most of them are tyre-kickers. Good luck buddy.

Oh my god, dude! I've noticed the exact same thing about Squirt! They'll do these stupid little promotions where they'll say things like: add a video and we'll put you in a ruffle to potentially win free membership. It's like... I'll post videos FOR the free membership not some random ass ruffle that I more than likely will not win, and yet now I've uploaded content for your site to get transit. It's a fucking SCAM. And Squirt is totally not about facilitating any kind of hook up. They do a lot of the same tired and obnoxious PC banter about respect and diversity and half these sites can't even implement that.

I'm primarily looking for a good lay, but the thing is, I don't cancel out that a good lay might turn into something deeper. This, I find to be the hypocrisy of gay men. For all the talk about 'Don't kink shame' this and 'Diversity that' and 'Sex Positive' this and 'Don't slut shame' that, gay men are pretty moralistic about sex. It's like a healthy relationship cannot exist if you come across sexual. It's the very heteronormative approach to sex that queers claim to denounce that plays itself out: If you want to find a relationship, you shouldn't lead with sex. Well for me, I'm a very sexual person. My relationship has to be sexual. But somehow to be sexual, even the apps is grounds for not wanting something serious. And I agree with you 100% man. Guys don't bother reading profiles and then get shocked when you say you're not into quickies or anon stuff.

I also find it pretty telling that all these people who go off about 'I don't do labels!' "Why can we more than just tops and bottoms!" haven't the slightest bit of imagination outside that very binary they chastice. For example, I'm a bottom. 100% bottom. I finger my ass when I masturbate, I PHYSICALLY need something in my ass to cum. All these guys and myself included when I try to cum just from stroking my dick, it won't happen. I need something in my ass. This, doesn't mean that I'm only looking for exclusive tops. I love rimming a guy, I love playing with a guy's hole, shit one of my biggest fantasies is to share a doubleheaded Dildo with another guy. I'm pretty much open, willing and would love to find other bottoms to have all ass, all hole play. And yet these very same guys who are all about fluidity, and don't label me, are the very ones looking for masc tops to make them into cumdumps.

And then lately everyone seems to be this Dom or Sub. Like nothing exists in between or even outside of that while BDSM, Domination, stuff. That stuff doesn't interest me in the least. And I say it very clearly in my profile. Next thing you know, I have all these guys who want me to be their slave. Something else I'm very clear about in my profile is 'No married, anon, DL guys'. Why? Because I LOVE sex. I really, really, really love sex. I love to lick a guy's body, I love kiss, I love body contact, caressing, touching, taking my time, exploring a guy's body. And married, anon, DL guys seem to be looking for quickies more than anything. I think quickies are such a waste of time because I spent hours douching my asshole for some guy to come in for 5 mins, not even look at me in the face, dump his load and leave. So what the fuck did I spent an hour or two douching for? What do I get out of this?

Anyway, it doesn't matter cuz these days I'm not even getting laid. Like I said, I got ghosted this morning, this guy is probably posting my pics online, or whatever, I haven't had sex in like three or four months, and it doesn't seem like that'll change anytime soon. So I guess I'm entering my incel era.

 

[Alex Rose]

Oh my god, dude! I've noticed the exact same thing about Squirt! They'll do these stupid little promotions where they'll say things like: add a video and we'll put you in a ruffle to potentially win free membership. It's like... I'll post videos FOR the free membership not some random ass ruffle that I more than likely will not win, and yet now I've uploaded content for your site to get transit. It's a fucking SCAM. And Squirt is totally not about facilitating any kind of hook up. They do a lot of the same tired and obnoxious PC banter about respect and diversity and half these sites can't even implement that.

I'm primarily looking for a good lay, but the thing is, I don't cancel out that a good lay might turn into something deeper. This, I find to be the hypocrisy of gay men. For all the talk about 'Don't kink shame' this and 'Diversity that' and 'Sex Positive' this and 'Don't slut shame' that, gay men are pretty moralistic about sex. It's like a healthy relationship cannot exist if you come across sexual. It's the very heteronormative approach to sex that queers claim to denounce that plays itself out: If you want to find a relationship, you shouldn't lead with sex. Well for me, I'm a very sexual person. My relationship has to be sexual. But somehow to be sexual, even the apps is grounds for not wanting something serious. And I agree with you 100% man. Guys don't bother reading profiles and then get shocked when you say you're not into quickies or anon stuff.

I also find it pretty telling that all these people who go off about 'I don't do labels!' "Why can we more than just tops and bottoms!" haven't the slightest bit of imagination outside that very binary they chastice. For example, I'm a bottom. 100% bottom. I finger my ass when I masturbate, I PHYSICALLY need something in my ass to cum. All these guys and myself included when I try to cum just from stroking my dick, it won't happen. I need something in my ass. This, doesn't mean that I'm only looking for exclusive tops. I love rimming a guy, I love playing with a guy's hole, shit one of my biggest fantasies is to share a doubleheaded dildo with another guy. I'm pretty much open, willing and would love to find other bottoms to have all ass, all hole play. And yet these very same guys who are all about fluidity, and don't label me, are the very ones looking for masc tops to make them into cumdumps.

And then lately everyone seems to be this Dom or Sub. Like nothing exists in between or even outside of that while BDSM, Domination, stuff. That stuff doesn't interest me in the least. And I say it very clearly in my profile. Next thing you know, I have all these guys who want me to be their slave. Something else I'm very clear about in my profile is 'No married, anon, DL guys'. Why? Because I LOVE sex. I really, really, really love sex. I love to lick a guy's body, I love kiss, I love body contact, caressing, touching, taking my time, exploring a guy's body. And married, anon, DL guys seem to be looking for quickies more than anything. I think quickies are such a waste of time because I spent hours douching my asshole for some guy to come in for 5 mins, not even look at me in the face, dump his load and leave. So what the fuck did I spent an hour or two douching for? What do I get out of this?

Anyway, it doesn't matter cuz these days I'm not even getting laid. Like I said, I got ghosted this morning, this guy is probably posting my pics online, or whatever, I haven't had sex in like three or four months, and it doesn't seem like that'll change anytime soon. So I guess I'm entering my incel era.

I hear you mean I haven't bottom in months and its tough for me finding the right person. I usual just have solo fun but its the same.

I guess all depends on where you live. Maybe try sniffies its free and I've had some great experiences.
I've been back and forth between that and taimi but that can be a pain cause alot requires a membership.

I really hope you find someone thats right for you!