Gay guys on dating sites the most judgmental?

[e2ksj3]

Just wanted to get everyone's opinion on this, but is it me or does it seem like a lot of gay people seem pretty judgmental and just down right rude, at least on a lot of dating sites? I've noticed a lot of ads that just seem, not very friendly for lack of better word, lol.

I've seen a lot that use words in their ads like "no fatties or old people" and saying that they would be blocked if they even contacted them. I've even had situations where I would be talking to people for awhile and we would have a lot in common or what not, but then the instant they saw my pic they would block me or just stop talking to me. I understand people having preferences that's fine, but I don't think people have to be rude about it.

I find it ironic that we want people to be accepting of us and not be so judgemental, but at the same time it seems like a lot of gay guys are. What's everyone's experience with this?

 

[SLOPPYSECONDS]

Just wanted to get everyone's opinion on this, but is it me or does it seem like a lot of gay people seem pretty judgmental and just down right rude, at least on a lot of dating sites? I've noticed a lot of ads that just seem, not very friendly for lack of better word, lol.

I've seen a lot that use words in their ads like "no fatties or old people" and saying that they would be blocked if they even contacted them. I've even had situations where I would be talking to people for awhile and we would have a lot in common or what not, but then the instant they saw my pic they would block me or just stop talking to me. I understand people having preferences that's fine, but I don't think people have to be rude about it.

I find it ironic that we want people to be accepting of us and not be so judgemental, but at the same time it seems like a lot of gay guys are. What's everyone's experience with this?

cause they put word GAY on theirs profile? it internet MOST no idea what their butt contain ans da da butt their eyes nose ears stuck ta

Internet not da world!!!!!!!!!!!!!! any dead meat figure it but sures lot das crap of it end up spit their shit on it

 

[e2ksj3]

I definitely don't disagree, there is a lot of shallowness all over, but I don't know it seems so blatant there though. It's probably the whole anonymous factor of Internet. I don't think people would directly say that to a person's face, then again I maybe wrong about that, lol. I think people should realize though there is another person on the end of that screen who maybe reading that who may already have low self-esteem. I'm probably preaching to the choir here, but after reading a lot of ads lately, it started to really bother me.

 

[cliffdweller]

I haven't been on dating sites in a long time, but yeah it's true. I wonder if a lot of these guys just don't want to get too close to people, on a subconscious level, so they act like assholes. It always struck me as extreme defensiveness more than anything.

 

[Mr-Pickles]

I see where you're coming from, but it's kind of just being blunt so you don't waste your time messaging them and so they don't get numerous messages off people who they aren't particularly interested in. Surely listing the types of guys they are into would be far nicer, but I'm sure that list would be long and more restricting.

Not looking for: 25+, fat, etc

At least indicated to you that this person isn't interested in you and/or that they are shallow.



I don't use dating sites, but I do know the type you are referring to.

 

[SLOPPYSECONDS]

I definitely don't disagree, there is a lot of shallowness all over, but I don't know it seems so blatant there though. It's probably the whole anonymous factor of Internet. I don't think people would directly say that to a person's face, then again I maybe wrong about that, lol. I think people should realize though there is another person on the end of that screen who maybe reading that who may already have low self-esteem. I'm probably preaching to the choir here, but after reading a lot of ads lately, it started to really bother me.

theys a no anonymous ins real world but lot da toons slap their crap down across internet sure a live farty ballons such is cultures around world stink theirs a cocoons

maybe da countrys stoooopid educates discova what crap they create call da public what talk out their assholes what no say much a fors da systems in many countrys what folk

already know stink like rots fish way past vommit

ans what amazin da toons scuk each other vommit cause theys alls dead farts ta life ans look fa somethin ta doooooo

unless it what it a call da civlization ans it high culture thens lot coutrys sure love vommit with knapkin of a course
( please )
#BARRF you welcome #
( URM so kind )



ya do know internet before internet!

say hi ta da millions of public watch reality tv shows! go figure

 

[SLOPPYSECONDS]

Gay dating sites aren't the most judgmental IMO. They are probably the most truthful. They tell you what they want and what they expect. Not everyone fits the mold, but not everyone will. Lots of ways to meet guys without relying on the Internet. Yup, the Internet can mean an instant connection, but it can also mean instant disappointment.

no think most folk slides theirs fingers ons ta internet figure where Gay born from
ans lot da words born forms da stills ons a goins of da great ans wonders of many cultures what barkin loonys stills think theys a super civlized HA

but maybe fact tiny number folk ons forums across internet good thang or not

but of no consquence ifs da real world countrys startin look da puss exploin zit right their faces



no forget lickin porn pics on internet will not turn ya inta latest IBOD < titters

 

[GPK1984]

Just wanted to get everyone's opinion on this, but is it me or does it seem like a lot of gay people seem pretty judgmental and just down right rude, at least on a lot of dating sites? I've noticed a lot of ads that just seem, not very friendly for lack of better word, lol.

I've seen a lot that use words in their ads like "no fatties or old people" and saying that they would be blocked if they even contacted them. I've even had situations where I would be talking to people for awhile and we would have a lot in common or what not, but then the instant they saw my pic they would block me or just stop talking to me. I understand people having preferences that's fine, but I don't think people have to be rude about it.

I find it ironic that we want people to be accepting of us and not be so judgemental, but at the same time it seems like a lot of gay guys are. What's everyone's experience with this?

I agree with you 110%!! The same always happens to me also.Where is the love??

 

[SLOPPYSECONDS]

I agree with you 110%!! The same always happens to me also.Where is the love??

it charge by da hour me hear

or da minute depend ons da wishes

ans so on all around da world



but me give it free

 

[SLOPPYSECONDS]

I don't think so.

I just think going on these kinds of sites anywhere you're going to get the most shallowness and judgmental type of people because they can be. Some are looking for legit dates while the majority are looking to just straight hook up.



This is something I kind of get tired of hearing. It sucks and I get the point, but the unfortunate part of it is we are people like anyone else. We have our ignorant/racist/judgmental/shallow people just like anyone else.

A lot of people are judgmental in general. A lot.

dat assumesins theys a people ans if a people what is their total self da cultures spawn um ans lots? might be 6 dudes ons roundabout

maybe internet jelp countrys professionals ans folks suffer da crap dump on um of so call educate civlize sustems

get a there act tagether ans catch up ta 21stcentury not stuck middle ages bewteen da bull ans miss henrieta what singin sweet mary ta lord dufus head what cryin cause not likes his a dinner unless spoon feed at him

 

[GL]

it feels like it. i know i've been rejected and i have rejected others myself but at the end of the day i don't think we as gay folk own the mantle of 'judgmental.' people being what they are i'd say everyone is judgmental in some form or fashion.

 

[SLOPPYSECONDS]

I think some of the reasons why guys are like that on "dating" sites is that they're looking for sex and want what they like. They can be blunt and straightforward (even rude) about it.

For a metaphor, lets say someone goes to a restaruant and they HATE mushrooms. When they look at they menu, they're not gonna waste their time looking at items with mushrooms and they don't want the waiter to talk them into an item that has mushrooms. They know what they want and what they don't want.

I think rudeness happens more online than IRL is because of the "anonymous" factor. Since it's online, they can send a quick message of rejection, maybe block them, and move on, or even not respond at all. They don't have to deal with the reaction to rejection, they don't have other people around to witness, so it doesn't really matter how they handle it.

Although not all guys online are rude, although I think it's easier to be rude. Although there's plenty of rude guys in bars and stuff. Also plenty of great guys online as well.

customers meetins their own face in mirror? titters

life it maybe start out da soup of whateva
maybe internet da soup ans humans who know figure it

how many thousands years take humans learn where theirs a feet is?

HA



bless da dead what die in wait

 

[Georgiadude]

I know exactly what your talking about. I've learned there are jerks everywhere you go and the net seems to be crawling with them. It's very easy for them to be rude and down right mean as they hide behind their computer. There's a difference between being honest about what you are looking for and being rude/mean. If you aren't a match that's fine. It happens but you don't have to be a dick about it. Simply tell the person in a nice way that you aren't a match or that you have changed your mind. Instead some people have to play the disappearing game or act like your the ugliest person on the planet. If you say it nicely and they dont take the hint then block them. simple. All I can hope is that someone along the way treats them the exact same way.

Steven.

 

[bripatrick]

When I did use those sites, I'd prefer if guys had things like "no fatties" or "if you're not hot, I'll block you" comments in their profile...because I knew immediately they were probably assholes, or, to be less extreme, did not share my core values of respect and tact. We wouldn't get along, so why waste my time?

 

[HouseOfHedon]

There are two peices of advice that were shared with me as I came out of the closet that I'd like to share with you. 1) there really is someone for everyone. Yes, it is a bit cliche but also true. The are dating sites for chubs who like twinks and sites for older. Guys who like twinks. I even stumbled across a site for gay amputees. Figure out which slice of meat you are and get ib the meat market.

2) most gay boys are 5s and 6s chasing after 9s and 10s. Just as you have a tad of a self esteem problem, many guys have the opposite. I do porn for a living, trust me, I've met some real crAzies. ( stories for another thread someday lol)

You sound like A lovely person. Go meet some better. Guys

 

[treanir]

Sometimes I wanna put no gay men on my profiles. But I know that won't help.

Plenty of "no men!" profiles. They're looking for transsexuals ("or very feminine transvestites", kinda defeating the point of 'no men' ). So there ya go.


Gay guys are shallow and judgemental on dating sites because it's so easy to click that delete/block button, or send a nasty reply to the oh so hideous guy who dares to send you a message. The other guy is nothing more than pixels on a screen, so you don't have to deal with (don't even have to think about) the consequences of your words and actions.

 

[hylas]

i dont know wether gay dating sites are more hostile than straight dating sites (do those even exist?), and i think we should be careful about making statements about "gay guys". but i know what youre talking about.

there is a fine line between being clear about what youre looking for, and being an asshole about it. many are so stupid/insensitive/self-involved that they dont even realize there is such a line. in my experience, its the best to just ignore those people and move on.

but while i agree that decent people make an effort to not be assholes about their prefernces, i also have to roll my eyes at the "5s and 6s chasing after 9s and 10s" mentioned above. first going after those who have desirable pictures/stats, then crying foul because they get rejected for having less desirable pictures/stats themselves. just a general remark, not specifically aimed at anybody here (obviously, since i dont know how most of you guys look like, or what kind of guys youre after)

I've even had situations where I would be talking to people for awhile and we would have a lot in common or what not, but then the instant they saw my pic they would block me or just stop talking to me.

cant help but think, though, couldnt you easily avoid these situations by being upfront with your picture?

 

[FanofFiction]

No fats, no fems, must be out/must be descreet, must be under 30, must be smooth/must have chesthair, etc etc etc.

I think gay men are certainly a lot more judgmental than anybody else. My poor chubby friend can't meet anyone because he is overweight and not terribly attractive. It's sad because he's actually a great guy. Good job. Has a car, a nice apartment, etc.

 

[e2ksj3]

When I did use those sites, I'd prefer if guys had things like "no fatties" or "if you're not hot, I'll block you" comments in their profile...because I knew immediately they were probably assholes, or, to be less extreme, did not share my core values of respect and tact. We wouldn't get along, so why waste my time?

You definitely have a point there, lol. It just seems to be so many of them out there though.

 

[e2ksj3]

i dont know wether gay dating sites are more hostile than straight dating sites (do those even exist?), and i think we should be careful about making statements about "gay guys". but i know what youre talking about.

there is a fine line between being clear about what youre looking for, and being an asshole about it. many are so stupid/insensitive/self-involved that they dont even realize there is such a line. in my experience, its the best to just ignore those people and move on.

but while i agree that decent people make an effort to not be assholes about their prefernces, i also have to roll my eyes at the "5s and 6s chasing after 9s and 10s" mentioned above. first going after those who have desirable pictures/stats, then crying foul because they get rejected for having less desirable pictures/stats themselves . just a general remark, not specifically aimed at anybody here (obviously, since i dont know how most of you guys look like, or what kind of guys youre after)

Why? What may appeal to me, may not necessarily appeal to you and when did we get into a situation of ranking people by numbers.

cant help but think, though, couldnt you easily avoid these situations by being upfront with your picture?

I do now, but at the time, I was fully in the closet and didn't want people to know. It still doesn't justify being rude. All they had to say was "umm, you seem like a nice guy, but you aren't my type, no offense" or something along those lines.