Gay Porn = Gay Boy?

[nakedboy]

Your user name tells it all. Enough said on this thread.

 

[FlyingCheeseSteak]

I totally get you. I, however, like girls bodies but not their personalities. But I am in full agreement with the fucking like crazy part.

I do think you are gay though - if not "gay" then definitely homosexual.

 

[Reprobate]

Hey Group,

I have something I need to get off my chest: I LOVE gay porn. I like to watch it and jerk off to it and then watch more of it.

The appeal of it, from what I can gather through some self inspection, is the raw, uninhibited passion displayed in the videos. The scenes where "anything goes" and guys fuck like crazy really turn me on.

For whatever reason (society probably) I have no moral or social conflicts in watching two (or more) guys fucking like animals. I have no problem with viewing men as purely sex driven animals who craze sex and love it.

Straight porn, however, does nothing for me, because I do not like seeing women degraded and have a hard time seeing them as merely sexual objects. In real life, I am attracted to women and date them, but I primarily drawn to them for their personalities not their bodies. Once I get to know a girl, I start to feel a sexual attraction.

In real life, I may think a guy has a great body, but I never have any romantic thoughts for men. In fact, outside of gay porn, men do nothing for me. And I certaintly could never be aroused by actually trying anything sexual with a man since the mere thought repulses me.

So my question is does enjoyment of gay porn mean someone is gay? I mean, liking military movies doesn't make you a soldier anymore than liking horror movies makes you a murder, right?

I like women, I like seeing beutiful women as long as they have clothes on. The moment the clothes come off all the magic goes away but when I see a mans chest, legs, ass, cock it just drives me wild. I get what you are saying about not liking straight porn but it is not for the reasons you state. You are gay or bi but you damn sure are not straight but it sounds like you have some homophobic issues to deal with before you can be comfortable with your attraction to men or gay porn.

 

[Reprobate]

I lived a straight life until I was 38, allot if not all of those "straight" men who like gay porn are hiding what they really feel, maybe they are bisexual or maybe they are gay but you like watching guys sucking dick or being fucked then you are not 100% straight. I am not saying that you should go have sex with men, just that there is a part of you that is attracted to men and it is just easier to acknowledge that then go on with your life. Part of me is attracted to women but I do not and have never realy enjoyed sex with them, it was always more of a task to get done as quickly as possible and when I came out to my wife she was like "no wonder, that's why" but I still find women attractive as long as they have clothes on, to me a muscular hairy mans chest is far sexier than a womans chest any day.

 

[RicanDAB]

Your user name tells it all. Enough said on this thread.

AND

... but you like watching guys sucking dick or being fucked then you are not 100% straight.

These pretty much covered my sentiments exactly.

 

[probeteam1]

Well, this gets into some tricky questions.
Certainly, getting off to gay porn fall outside of what is generally considered to be "straight." But "straight" and "gay" aren't the only two options.

I suppose part of it comes from the idea of why we watch movies.
Enjoying military movies doesn't make you a solcier, but it probably means that some part of you likes the idea of the military in some way. And while watching horror movies doesn't make you a murderer (or a murder victim), it does probably mean that some part of you enjoys the thrill of being scared out of your pants. Likewise, it seems reasonable for many to assume that if you enjoy watching gay porn, then some part of you likes the idea of gay sex.

This doesn't necessarily make you gay, but it's possible that you're a little bit bi.
More importantly, the only people who need to be privy to your porn-viewing habits (much less form opinions about your sexuality from them) are you and anyone with whom you end up viewing porn. If you want to continue calling yourself straight, no one here can stop you.
Labels are a matter of convenience; if you only intend to ever have sex with women, and only form relationships with women, then you can go ahead and call yourself heterosexual with no problem; even if on some more essential philosophical level you should be "properly" labeled bisexual, it hardly matters if that bisexual potential is never expressed.
Saying "I'm bisexual" but only having relationships/sex with women is as pointless as saying "I'm straight" while having relationships/sex with the same sex, or saying "I'm gay" while still having sex/relationships with the opposite sex. Labels are there so people can know what's in the container; if the label ceases to match the contents, then it serves no purpose.

Given the lifestyle that you describe (enjoying men only in porn, and having no desire to actually have sex with a man), the only reason you should call yourself anything other than straight is your own comfort; if the label of "heterosexual" doesn't seem to fit you any more, then select a new one that suits you better.
If you feel differently later, you can always call yourselfsomething different then.

 

[Elworth]

I think Probe expressed my sentiments fairly well. I see nothing wrong with liking gay porn based on the seemingly uninhibited animal sex that may be contained in some of the videos.

I don't think it makes you gay. "Gay" is most definitely a label, and I tend to agree that you fall outside of this one, although you may not be 100% straight. It makes me think of Kinsey's scale.

Anyways, enjoy yourself. Don't worry about what it makes you. It makes you yourself, a unique individual. I wouldn't necessarily tell people, as it would cause undue speculation, but I think you can relax about it.

 

[gewhite3]

Yup!! Uh huh.......

 

[josher]

I don't know any straight men who would "enjoy" gay porn to the point of arousal and ejaculation. Were you in a situation where sex with another attractive guy could easily take place anonymously, I wonder what you might actually find yourself doing.

 

[Soilwork]

Didn't we just finally put that "I'm not gay so why do I like gay porn" thread to bed like last week?

Sorry.. but if gay sex turns you on and straight sex doesn't... Sir, you're gay.











now, the real question is why do you not have any interest in sex in the real world but instead only have an interest in sex on DVD?

 

[RicanDAB]

Didn't we just finally put that "I'm not gay so why do I like gay porn" thread to bed like last week?

Sorry.. but if gay sex turns you on and straight sex doesn't... Sir, you're gay.

now, the real question is why do you not have any interest in sex in the real world but instead only have an interest in sex on DVD?

And THIS is why I admire Soilwork

 

[Something Else]

I am one that believes that you are NOT what you think of, but what you do.

So, if you're not engaging in man to man sex (from frottage, oral to penetrative sex); then I wouldn't say you are gay because of what goes in your mind.

I would actually consider you, if you want a label, as someone whom is Bi Curious. As it has been just thoughts thus far--i'm presuming.

However, that said...

I would be remiss to say that I'm wondering if this is a cognizant resistant effort on your part to NOT cross that, proverbial, line. Where you no longer can say it's just a fascination or fantasy, because of the fear of what you'll discover then.

For me, that was a struggle for some time. However, I finally challenged myself to find out if I truly had the ability or capacity to enjoy sex or possibly love another man--as I have with women.

I've found that I could, for what it's worth. But that's only after I made myself entirely uninhibited to finding out just what is it that I truly want.

Of course that was what made me feel better.

Knowing myself and knowing all of my wants and desires. However, for you it may be different. It may suit others not knowing everything--as everything as they are has been perfectly fine.

I believe, ultimately, that unless you want to bring confusion to the woman you are dating, labeling yourself as Bi or anything is premature.

If you don't mind me being presumptuous, I would STRONGLY suggest finding out once and for all whether your fantasy & reality mesh. But then again, I've always been more the type that HAS to know, lol

i'll quote what probeteam1 said since it captures the whole concept of labels, and what it means to others.

Saying "I'm bisexual" but only having relationships/sex with women is as pointless as saying "I'm straight" while having relationships/sex with the same sex, or saying "I'm gay" while still having sex/relationships with the opposite sex. Labels are there so people can know what's in the container; if the label ceases to match the contents, then it serves no purpose.

 

[SilverRRCloud]

Didn't we just finally put that "I'm not gay so why do I like gay porn" thread to bed like last week?

Sorry.. but if gay sex turns you on and straight sex doesn't... Sir, you're gay.

now, the real question is why do you not have any interest in sex in the real world but instead only have an interest in sex on DVD?

I'd like to agree with Jasun here.

Yet, I'd rather stick with the notion that actions speak louder than words.

Homosexual is not so much, what turns you on but whom you usually have sex with. It describes your actual behaviour not your sexual fantasies.

So, you'll be a gay guy for the rest of us, once you overcome your own inner barriers and start fullfilling your fantasies in real life.

In other words, knowing that you are gay makes sense for the rest of the world only if you:

a) have sex with other men
b) actively intend to have sex with others

What fantasies make you hot and what porn you jerk off to, are of little consequence to the rest of the world.

SC

 

[bayern20]

The only reason, the ONLY reason, you dont get turned on in real life by the idea of gay sex, as opposed to getting turned on watching gay porn, is that you are not comfortable. I know it seems too simple.."but that cant be it", but it is my friend. For a long time I was only able to get turned on by just gay porn, but I knew it was that reason. I knew because I allowed myself to consider it because I had already accepted I was gay. If you dont accept that you are gay, you cant even consider this seriously.

Personally, I like straight porn, sometimes more than gay. Does that mean I'm straight though? No, because I watch it because I like to see the guy doing "what guys do best". I dont get disgusted by the thought of pussy, therefore, I can watch. But watching any hot guy fucking is hot IMO. Maybe this is especially true for guys that are more bottoms than tops because you can put yourself in the situation too.

 

[ludolfo]

hmmmmm weird. you like gay porn and wank off to it yet dont want to grab a dude in real LIFE...? have i got you RIIIGHT...(this is where i'd place a smiley but QR dont have em)

well. i dont think women ARE the little abused ever so fragile things you think they are in straght porno. shit, not the ones I've seen. they seem as hungry as their male lovers more so in some scenes.

i am not mad about this division between 'straight' and 'gay'--i think it sucks. now dont get me wrong. I definately only get off fantasizing bout men, but i am open to bisexuality in others. i see sexuality as like a spectrum. all different flavas. you just seem ---put it this way. you teach me i learn something new everyday. had never heard of THAT before

 

[RenaissanceMan]

Homosexual is not so much, what turns you on but whom you usually have sex with. It describes your actual behaviour not your sexual fantasies.

In that case, a man who has sex with women but only fantasizes about sex between men is straight?

I think many gay men aren't able to see themselves in gay sex at some point...but the fantasy of SOME men having sex, being intimate, is still there. It probably most often passes with time, and you become comfortable with the idea. Romantic feelings for a guy take a while to get comfortable with too (in a very heterosexist society which doesn't like men getting a little soft inside for another man). It helps to have met a man or two who brings out feelings like these...

Straight porn really isn't any different from gay porn...they're enough "passion" and "raw fucking" in either, and there's a lot of different types. And I think watching other kinds of movies is different: we watch porn because it turns us on, not because the story-line is deserving of an Oscar, no matter how much the subject matter might not appeal to us.

 

[spreadeagle]

I'm with you, queerboi - you are not what you do, but what you think.

You're gay if your primary emotional connection is with other men. That means that you need never have sexual contact with a same gender partner - you might be married with kids - but you are still gay if you feel your primary connection is with other men.

Your initial post says it all - the thought of ever having sexual contact with another man repulses you - ergo, you are not gay.

On the porn question:
Porn is designed to be compulsive, exciting and addictive.

Men respond far more readily than women to visual stimuli.

Especially in gay porn, the (male) viewer is seduced by various techniques - camera angles, stereotypical characterisation etc - to identify with one or other of the performers.

Both gay and straight men have identical physiological mechanisms for sexual arousal and release.

The majority of men will masturbate many more times in their lives than they will ever climax though sexual intercourse.

 

[Soilwork]

That's pretty much it... just because you're celebate doesn't mean you're not gay.

Sorry, but gay isn't something I DO, gay is something I AM, and no amount of saying "well, yeah, but" is going to change that.

 

[Eagle653]

now, the real question is why do you not have any interest in sex in the real world but instead only have an interest in sex on DVD?

This is my question too.

What you are attracted to in terms of porn, and what you fantasize about during masturbation, are pretty strong indicators as to your sexual attraction.

In your case, how that makes you anything other than gay, I don't know. It's not such a bad thing, really.

 

[Just_Believe18]

Come on. If you're going to pull this kind of bull on us, you might as well use a more convincing name. Queerboi?

We provide support and advice based on a level of trust that what people bring to this board is true and honest.

That said, do you really expect us to believe a man who doesn't find himself gay outside of jerking off to gay porn is straight when using "QueerBoi" as a name? If such a man even existed, would he really call himself "QueerBoi?" With the cutesy little "i" in place of the "y"?