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Gday. Hope you can help.

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newguyaus

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Hi everyone,
I found this website through google and decided to sign up.

I'm not sure if I should post this in another thread, but the reason I've signed up is because I'm after some advice. I'm 21 and live in Australia. In July last year I got married and in November we had a gorgeous little girl. The problem here is that for years - since adolescence - I've been attracted to men just as much, if not more, than women. I think I even loved my best mate in high school and I often find myself watching gay porn, probably more often than straight or bi porn.

I suppose I'm just wondering if there's anyone else here who's faced the same predicament and wondering what I should do, if anything.

Thanks guys.

Cheers.
 
Hello love,

Check out the forum titled "Coming Out/Bisex Talk". I think you'll find that there are many men here to whom you can relate, and there's been lots of excellent advice given to many regarding this and other situations. This link should take you there, if I've done it correctly:

http://www.justusboys.com/forum/forumdisplay.php?f=70


Welcome to JUB, and best wishes.


J.
 
Thanks for your quick reply, J. I'll check the thread out now.

I'm really excited to be a part of the community and look forward to actively contributing in the future.

Cheers
 
9.gif


also i agree i think you should check out the other forum. in fact I think you thread here will get more replies in the other forum, so i've moved your thread over there. there will be a redirect link for about a week.

- mikey
 
newguyaus said:
Thanks for your quick reply, J. I'll check the thread out now.

I'm really excited to be a part of the community and look forward to actively contributing in the future.

Cheers
Click to expand...


You're welcome!

Glad you've found a place to at least express yourself and get things off your chest. I'm sure some of the many wise men here will be along shortly to give you their take on the situation, but do have a read around the other topics, as I think you'll at least see you aren't alone.
 
Welcome to JUB.

Well, I see you've made a few "little" mistakes already. :) Jeez, buddy!

To answer your question: Yes, there are lots of guys who realize/accept too late that they're gay. I'm one of them (was married for over a decade myself).

It's time to turn your life around. It won't happen instantly. Don't do anything rash. Don't do anything for now. Stay here and read others' stories. There are lots of them.

Learn to accept yourself for who you are. Learn to love yourself.

Eventually, you should probably get divorced and live your life true to yourself. But you've got major complications, so as I said, don't make any rash decisions.

Again, welcome! (*8*)
 
Welcome to JUB. You have found a great place to hang out and exchange ideas.

I've posted my story before so I'm not going to do it again. Just do a search and it will come up. Like you I was married and had children (a son and a daughter) when it became clear to me that I was indeed gay. I thought I was bi and for several years had convinced myself that I could live the "straight" life. I thought I would just get off to gay porn and everything would be ok. It didn't take long and the feelings/desires became too great. I had to admit to myself that I was gay. It didn't take long and my marriage was over. Shortly after getting divorced I came out. It felt amazing to not have to lie and hide any longer. It was very liberating. Of course there are still the daily struggles of life however I'm not hiding who I am. That feels pretty good. Not saying you need to come out right now. I'm saying don't make the same mistake I did. Don't get years into the relationship and regret not coming out sooner. Dont think you can suppress and ignore those feelings. They don't go away. I'm sure some will say they are dealing with it and wont change. It's their life. Who am I to judge. I'm just offering my experience and thoughts. What you do is up to you.

I'll be more than happy to PM with you if you wish. Just drop me a note and I'll be happy to chat.

Best wishes and welcome.

Steven.
 
Welcome to JUB, newguy. You've found a great site and there are plenty of guys here who have trod a similar path to yourself.

There are loads of Aussie guys on here as well so you'll get some local "flavour".

You've got some tough times coming up for you and your wife as you work through this. I've not been in your situation but just to let you know that you've got lots of support here as you take this journey.

We'll be here to listen and advise and maybe sometimes tease you and give you a bit of stick if necessary! ;)

Look after yourself and again, welcome to JUB. You've taken a big step to join up here; you won't regret it.
(*8*):wave:
 
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