Getting concerned about the porn I've been watching (bareback, cum in ass, HIV)

[dreambelieve]

So all of a sudden I've had this weird change when it comes to porn. I got so horny looking at guys being fucked bareback and getting a load in their ass, and now it's my go-to porn type.

I feel so horrible watching these, a deep guilt. I've even gone as far as to look at videos of HIV negative guys getting barebacked and a load in their ass from HIV positive guys. And that really makes me feel bad. I'm concerned also because what if this gets into real life? What if I start fucking bareback and getting fucked bareback, and I get diseases and such? What if this turns me on so much that I get the urge to get HIV positive loads?

Please help me. Also note that I used to get horny from both bareback and protected porn, but now only the bareback turns me on a lot. Imagining fucking a nice ass bareback and cumming in it gets me so horny.

I'm a virgin, so these things are really scary for me.

 

[Telstra]

So all of a sudden I've had this weird change when it comes to porn. I got so horny looking at guys being fucked bareback and getting a load in their ass, and now it's my go-to porn type.

I feel so horrible watching these, a deep guilt. I've even gone as far as to look at videos of HIV negative guys getting barebacked and a load in their ass from HIV positive guys. And that really makes me feel bad. I'm concerned also because what if this gets into real life? What if I start fucking bareback and getting fucked bareback, and I get diseases and such? What if this turns me on so much that I get the urge to get HIV positive loads?

Please help me. Also note that I used to get horny from both bareback and protected porn, but now only the bareback turns me on a lot. Imagining fucking a nice ass bareback and cumming in it gets me so horny.

I'm a virgin, so these things are really scary for me.

Are there such videos? "Hiv positive guys fucking negative guys on purpose" ?
The producer should be put on trail.

 

[dreambelieve]

Are there such videos? "Hiv positive guys fucking negative guys on purpose" ?
The producer should be put on trail.

Mostly amateur videos. And it's the bottoms that want the "infected" load. There are blogs out there all about this kinda thing.

 

[dozyk74]

I think they're called bug chasers. Or something.

I love a good barebacking video with cumming inside but haven't really come across HIV+/- as a theme yet.

 

[crzyrazn]

I have the same liking for bareback porn. Honestly, it's hot and a turn on, but also, it's a fantasy. Most of that kind of porn is filmed by a studio, which follows STD/HIV testing requirements with selected models who know and understand the risks. There is no need to feel guilty about it, as an outbreak is very rare since testing requirements became the norm.

And such risks are real life. Diseases are very much real. And if you ever decide to take that risk, you very well know the consequences given your fears here. The best way to ensure that doesn't happen is to always wear protection, and know your status, and the status of the guy you are with.

Why you would ever knowingly have unprotected sex with a HIV+ guy is contrary to the fears you expressed here. Do you fear it's becoming a fetish of some sort you can't control?

I hear these days a lot about PrEp. An antiviral drug taken daily to reduce the risk of contracting HIV. However, this is in NO WAY A REASON TO HAVING PROMISCUOUS AND UNPROTECTED SEX.

As a sexually mature adult, you have to draw the line between fantasy and reality. Yeah, the fantasy is more alluring and forbidding, but trust me, it is not worth your health and your life.

 

[dreambelieve]

I don't know...these guys are making it look like having HIV is something cool and something to be proud of, a "gift". They're directing men to sites to meet HIV+ guys and have bareback sex with them, and they are doing it and contracting the disease.

Then lots of them get this cool "biohazard" tattoo, and show off and infect other guys who want the disease.

Yeah, I do think it's becoming some sort of fetish...and IDK it does seem interesting to me.

 

[crzyrazn]

I don't know...these guys are making it look like having HIV is something cool and something to be proud of, a "gift". They're directing men to sites to meet HIV+ guys and have bareback sex with them, and they are doing it and contracting the disease.

Then lots of them get this cool "biohazard" tattoo, and show off and infect other guys who want the disease.

Yeah, I do think it's becoming some sort of fetish...and IDK it does seem interesting to me.

It didn't look so cool to me when I watched as my cousin died a slow and painful death from AIDS related complications. All that for a tattoo? Hmph.

Just a point to make. That kind of porn is probably fictionalized and not real. Knowingly infecting someone with HIV, I believe, is a serious crime in some states, and could even lead to murder charges if the person dies from related health complications.

If you feel you couldn't control these impulses, I would seek counseling or therapy.

At least, stay away from those sites that portray this type of sex for a while. There is plenty of more healthy bareback porn.

 

[Seasoned]

I'd guess many people are attracted to fantasy situations that wouldn't be something they'd do in reality and therefore it's not a problem.

Some people keep raising the ante in real life so I do understand your concern. There is experimentation and self-destructive behavior and the two are, if course, different.

I'm describing two things here. The first is being attracted to what most would describe as taboo porn. The second is willfully being attracted to danger. The latter can be a sign of sex addiction and I'd urge a strong caution if that becomes an attraction in real life.

As you explore with sex partners you may discover that being with someone is enough and that things can be explored safely and provide everything you need and want. If you ever go down a path that frightens you or could cause harm that's when I'd suggest a therapist.

Sometimes people seeking the "gift" assume it's only a matter of time before they become HIV positive and want to be done with the anxiety of waiting. Please don't fall into that trap.

 

[Ganoderma]

hi dreambelieve,

Good you have made this posting about your concerns. Your profile indicates that you are 20 and you say that you are still a virgin. I have no idea at all about your experiences with gay guys / gay friends and if you are closeted or not (or something in between).

Anyway, I would like to advise you to get some 'real life' experiences with gay guys. Maybe you will soon realize yourself that porn is just a fantasy and that a real life experience with a sweet guy is totally different (be it that you just kiss him, that he is playing with your hair or whatever).

Seasoned is totally right that many people are very used to a large variety of fantasy situations, including with handsome guys they adore (but who are straight, etc.).

Good luck and feel free to react and/or ask addition questions.