Good fetish threads...ruined.

[SGTMaster]

There has been something I have noticed while lurking around here for a while. I will glance through the list of threads, something will catch my eye so I will open it up to see what fun lies in store. Normally some person states something about what they like, want to see or have done...then it goes south.

I consider myself pretty open when it comes to sex, hence why I am looking in the "fetish" area on here. I tend to think that if someone likes it, good for them. Granted there are some things that I will never do or do to another (or at least I think there is, time will tell) so I don't really bother with those threads (either open them or comment on them). Until recently I thought that was rather the unwritten rule, don't like it...don't partake.

So what I am sitting here wondering is, where did this "have to call you fetish/desire wrong and lecture you on why you are a bad person" fetish start? After all, we are on a fetish section and it sure looks like some people get off on it as much of it as I have seen lately. Do certain people get off feeling morally superior and publicly showing how upset they are by others thoughts and desires? Does attacking a person for their fetish an act that these people jerk off to?

If not, then why do I see it all the time on here? Just take the normal responses of "that's not safe/healthy" or "that is sick" I see on threads on here. Guess what, to over 90% of the world, just plain old gay sex fits both of those categories. Or the b.s. I just read about it is wrong to humiliate someones penis size...but it is okay to humiliate the person over all online? Is it because some of us are hiding behind a computer screen that is makes it okay or are just some of us more saintly than the rest?

So what is up with all the degrading and harassing statements on all these threads? Are we witnessing the birth of a new "I'm better than you online" fetish or are we just oppressing ourselves instead of the rest of the world doing it for us?

 

[BINOWGAYLATER]

Maybe the mods could look at those types of "comments" in a different light to help determine their appropriatness.

I'm all for "everyone's entitled to their opinion" -- but I also see how that can bring down the hard cock to Mr. Limpy status. I agree, it's not the place to lecture.

and definately - if you don't like it - or not interested - why are you here loking at it? Fetish police? i think not !

I'm not here all that often - luv the funny pics thread -- and haven't seen anybody say that one is going to send you to hell - but I think you make a very good point !!

 

[Nomenclature]

Fetish police?

Police officers in jock straps, leather, ball gags and tying each other up with rope?


"You have the right to remain sexy."

 

[Eagle653]

I agree completely, and I'm glad SGTMaster brought this up.

In general, posters' fetishes are respected here (as long as it's legal, of course). And, we try to remove inappropriate and judgmental posts from these threads. Unfortunately, sometimes some get away from us and we don't catch them.

If you all could do a Post Report on an inappropriate or judgmental post in this forum that would help direct us to it so we can deal with it.

Many thanks.

 

[Mike68]

Maybe the mods could look at those types of "comments" in a different light to help determine their appropriatness.

I'm all for "everyone's entitled to their opinion" -- but I also see how that can bring down the hard cock to Mr. Limpy status. I agree, it's not the place to lecture.

and definately - if you don't like it - or not interested - why are you here loking at it? Fetish police? i think not !

I'm not here all that often - luv the funny pics thread -- and haven't seen anybody say that one is going to send you to hell - but I think you make a very good point !!

I have always wondered this too.

 

[Seasoned]

That morally superior stuff could be someone hiding something. Back in the day I liked gloryholes. I had a friend who was horrified. Then I came to find out he lost his business because he was giving away free product to straight guys who would allow him to service them. I guess it's all from which side of the fence you are on. Of course, I'd be hoping there would be a hole in that fence.

I say live and let live when it comes to adult consensual sex.

 

[cocksucker4use]

Glad that someone brought this up. It is pretty consistent. I think it is fair for someone to comment that they could never do whatever. However, to lecture and shame the originator and judge all those who chime in with their own experiences of the topic, well....why? I agree that this is some sort of fetish onto itself. Some fuckin Pilgrim trippin bitches must be jerkin off over what perfect unsullied motherfuckers they truly are!

 

[NineOfClubs]

Are Kink threads in a no-flame zone?

If they were/are, then couldn't the mods consider all the tsk-tsk, naughty, naughty posts as coming from flamers? Couldn't they remove them?

 

[UncutBrit]

Hear hear. It's like vegetarians gatecrashing a butchers on some threads.

 

[medic1]

i posted a thread on this exact subject only a few days ago, i remember going to town on this guy because of what he had posted.
Then within a few hours i was getting posts saying who gave you the right to act as a moral superhero it was only then that i realised the post was from the fetish forum. I went straight back on and pubicly said sorry to this guy as the fault was all mine, then after more thought i had to agree nothing gives me the right to dictate to anyone what they may or may not do in THEIR private lifes.
I deserved that well placed kick in the balls and after thinking about it i realised what an asshole i had been, as long as it is consensual and legal then no-one has the right to dictate how some guys get their kicks.

 

[Telstra]

That morally superior stuff could be someone hiding something. Back in the day I liked gloryholes. I had a friend who was horrified. Then I came to find out he lost his business because he was giving away free product to straight guys who would allow him to service them. I guess it's all from which side of the fence you are on. Of course, I'd be hoping there would be a hole in that fence.

I say live and let live when it comes to adult consensual sex.

what an interesting story.
Can you tell in more details about the guy and his business ... etc. ?

 

[wooffy]

There is a lot of moral superiority and hate on JUB, and the mods do a poor job of stopping it. Any post on kinks will get a hate reply sooner or later, it seems inevitable.

My advice: find another venue to discuss kinks and fetishes.

 

[FanofFiction]

To hell with flamers. Ban the bastards!

 

[wooffy]

Here's an idea: move "Fetish And Kink Discussion" to its own sub-forum, and make it a no-flames zones with active moderation (and WTF are these topics doing with "other porn" anyway??????).

 

[MrBubulino]

Some gay people amaze me. They come all judgy to criticise other people's habits or turn-ons.
Maybe because they're too used to being judged? IDK.

Some of us are real hypocrits when it comes to respect others. We want our rights to be respected but we throw shit to everyone else. And that's just sad.

 

[medic1]

^
Woofy raises a very good point as i did not spot that the post i was reading came from the fetish forum.

 

[bankside]

SGTMaster, it depends a lot on the original post and how you asked the question too.

Like "Tell us about your wildest hottest evening of watersports" will get a very different response than "Do you like watersports?" And it should get a different response too. The first post is probably more what you're looking for. But if you ask a question like "Do you enjoy it?" then a lot of people who don't enjoy it will say so because that's what you asked.

 

[PocketAdonis]

People just have strong feelings about sex. I mean I'm gay, and I like some stuff that would be considered kinky by some, so you'd think i'd have an open mind - and I do, but I have to actually "keep" it open. Sometimes I have a kneejerk reaction to something and I find myself criticizing it, and THEN I think well, whatever trips your trigger as long as it's all consensual. So I can understand how less conscientious douchebags just rip others with no consideration.

OK once or twice I've dne it on here when the topic is "bareback sluts" or something, cuz it's like, when you fuck 100 guys in a single night bareback while tweaking, you're kind of a social biohazard. But even with that, I guess it's not like I can stop people from doing that if they feel compelled, and I guess the lesson is just that we all have to be even more careful who we fuck. The only thing I can really critcize with no reservations is like I said, non-consensual, or underage shit.

 

[EJMichaels]

...how you asked the question too.

Like "Tell us about your wildest hottest evening of watersports" will get a very different response than "Do you like watersports?"

That's a good point - asking for opinions will get them. In all forums, two of the things that can happen are: The OP is vague about the purpose of the thread and/or people don't read the first few posts to understand what sort of comment will be appreciated. The other common thing is complaints that a clearly labeled thread contains the thing stated in the label. Generally, no one is forced to scroll past the first post in a scat thread, for example.

Like Wooffy said, maybe we need a no-flame zone for kink. If we tried to bring up these topics in, for example, Coming Out (a no-flame zone), the post would probably get moved to Fetish.

And to answer the original question - yes and no - raining on the parade of others is popular, but not new. It could be a simply an attempt to be funny or to get attention. Anything short of actual hatefulness is a normal, expected part of this sort of forum (except for no-flame zones). At some point, they cross a line, and that's when you use the "report post" button. Before that point, use the scroll button. For repeat offenders, I think there's an "ignore" feature.

 

[LittleDove]

Perhaps those who frequent this particular portion of the forums couple petition the kind and wonderful, suave and enchanting, hunky and witty powers that be to enable thread tags/prefixes for this forum?

If there were, for example, a way to tag an individual thread as being "On Topic", then those who wanted to discuss a certain fetish from a generalised positive point of view would be pretty much allowed to do their thing without interference. When a more general discussion was desired -- which could include pro and/or con -- posters could not use the tags/prefixes, and leave the thread open for more opinions.

I do agree that sometimes posting styles/fuzzy writing seems to invite the problem. If you just start out with a statement of "What do you think about subject X?", for example, you do seem to be inviting a variety of opinions on the subject. OTOH (from my point of view, at least) I can see a problem where someone is asking about something which can present problems in any one of a number of areas. Suppose someone asks for help in exploring auto-erotic asphyxiation. Is it prohibited to note the possible life-threatening complications this could present?