Guy at gym is bisexual.

[jstud]

OK there is a gym I am going to at the moment where I live, its in a fairly conservative area. One of the trainers is drop dead gorgeous. He is a black, muscular guy, tall, the whole thing. Well, I happened to come across a myspace profile that I had seen before and to my surprise I see this guy and I recognize him this time because he's one of the trainers.

From the looks of things he's more leaning towards being gay and he seems to be more into the brothers than the white folks but I don't think that will stop me. My question is, how do I play this? He is not training me and thus far I really haven't paid much attention to him because I was convinced he was straight. He does not show any traits of being gay/bi, he is confident, masculine, everything I am not lol... well, I'm more masculine than a lot of gay guys but still.

There is a slight fear that this guy's myspace is fake, but for I am pretty sure its real because the profile user's location is within the area in which I live. I don't want to come on too desperate in case he is straight or thinks I am a fool. What should I do?

 

[Scottyboi]

Say "Hi"

Then ask him about weight training, give an indirect compliment to his body

 

[chace1617]

say ''hi''
then ask him to show you how to do an excersice or what time is it or where the bathroom is...

 

[jstud]

Hmmm lol. I thought about flirting by saying something really nice if he happens to open a door or something for me. I have to be careful how I play this one I think. I don't know if asking about gym equipment will work and its really not my style anyway. I am gonna see what happens when I see him next week, maybe even tomorrow if I get to the gym early enough. Maybe I can charm my way into his pants.

 

[jstud]

Someone made a comment on his myspace page that suggests the page is fake. Weird! Maybe I should ask him about it, don't know if that would be appropriate.

 

[Scottyboi]

^- would be weird

 

[stevexxx]

wow what a pansy. look if you are attracted to a gay black guy just be straight forward. all you have to say is "your dick, in my ass, right here and right now."or "my dick, in your ass, right here right now". i said that to a woman before except i said my dick, in your pussy, right here right now

 

[SayWhat]

Someone made a comment on his myspace page that suggests the page is fake. Weird! Maybe I should ask him about it, don't know if that would be appropriate.

^- would be weird

^ Agreed. Strongly.



I don't see what the hesitation is with asking him about gym equipment... It is, after all, his job. You could also ask him about supplements (i.e. what brand of protein powder he'd suggest, etc.) Then you also don't have the pressure of him staring at you while you do an exercise in front of him.

 

[Luke Lighthart]

Get to the gym very early one morning and fill the entire place with flowers. Then -- when he walks in -- ask him out on a date.

But seriously, just become friends with him and as you get to know him better you'll probably find out. If you don't hit it off as friends, he probably wouldn't be a good match anyway. Maybe one of the ways you can become friends with him is get to know a friend he talks to there frequently and maybe through that friend you'll meet him if you're having difficulty.

 

[pat grimshaw]

....From the looks of things he's more leaning towards being gay and he seems to be more into the brothers than the white folks but I don't think that will stop me...

mess with brothers?

 

[innocentbychoice]

mess with brothers?

He means the guy is into other black men.

 

[Yves Grey]

I agree with the direct straightforward approach. "Can I suck your dick?" is always very clear and unambiguous, and saves a lot of wasted time. Surprisingly it can result in a "Yes" answer if asked at the right time. Guys don't really like game playing, and can be surprisingly businesslike when it comes to arranging a sexual encounter. But it takes a lot of courage to ask that. If you don't have the courage for that question, "Hey, want to hang out?" is easier, and if he's interested, he will respond in a positive way.

Bravo! There is so much to be said for courage and just letting things go if they don't have the desired effect. I think it was old Teddy Roosevelt who said "The only thing we have to fear is fear itself," ja? Besides, I'd say 90% of the time the undesirable result isn't nearly as bad as anticipated.

I love this Herodotus quotation by Earl Nightingale: "It is better by noble boldness to run the risk of being subject to half of the evils we anticipate than to remain in cowardly listlessness for fear of what may happen."

If asking him out in his workplace, kindly recall that it is at least in part his livelihood, and so it is unkind to jeopardize it or sully his dignity. Ask him out when the two of you at least have some semblance of privacy--just not in the bathroom. I find the following works well for me, particularly if I'm not sure whether a guy is gay:

"I apologize if this is untoward, but I was wondering if you'd care to go out sometime."

If it goes south, I just smile self-assuredly, offer a wink and something along the lines of "too good an opportunity to pass up" as I excuse myself and apologize for any undue inconvenience.